bright light city

Sam, if you come near my sister again I'm gonna rip your lungs out. Possibly some other vital organs as well. Got that?

My own apartment and no parents? Schway! Hey Big-time, are you here too?

Uh, excuse me?

I'm sorry to bother anyone, but I was wondering if anyone could read this message somehow and could maybe tell me where my parents are?

Actually, I'd kind of be real grateful if somebody could tell me where I am. Last I knew I was in Climax, North Carolina. This don't look too much like my daddy's farm, though.

Is it Hell? Did I die? I know we're all sinners, but I didn't think I'd been able to do so so much bad in thirteen years.

(The typewriters are real funny. I like them, though.)

I'd like to go home now. Preferably to yesterday.

Oh, yeah. Not even death can conquer me!

Seriously, though. Guns. Not my favorite thing right now.

Okay, who is responsible for this rather poorly thought out practical joke? And, just so you know, practical jokes that leave permanent marks are actually horrible, no one likes them.

So this is the network thing Ginger was telling me about. I don't really see why she was making a big deal over it.