bright light city

( Filtered to Max )

Not sure exactly what's going on around here, but it's way too heavy. I'm hitting up Vegas' finest strip joints and spreading some of Zenner's cash. Who's with me?

Remember, strippers have kids too. And those Christmas presents aren't going to buy themselves. Give a little, get a lot.

Sweet. Co-ed rooms.

I had a very disturbing dream last night that culminated in my being eaten by a Lion.

First i tumble through a portal back into this world, then I find myself in Las Vegas, only to immediately be confronted by... a fan? My life is a cartoon.

I think I really need a drink. Where's Eric when you need him?

You want to know what's even worse than finding out you're a fictional character? Realizing that all of your worst hairstyle decisions have been broadcast publicly.

( seriously. why did no one stop this travesty? )

When I get home, Liz and I are going to have a serious talk. Friends should never let friends get haircuts worn by 12 year old Mormon boys.

Let's play a game. Word relation.

I say "Superman" and you think what?

Funny, no head bump, and yet here I am in Vegas with a barcode tattoo and a black card.

Okay, subconcious, I get it. I'm wasting my life in retail.

Can I wake up now?