Network comm for The Land of Make Believe

How interminably long is winter break? For Merlin's fucking sake. Does anyone want an obnoxious teen to come bother them for, god, an hour? I'll take an hour's peace.

His latest talents include blowing bubbles with his spit and marveling at my disgust, making weird clicking sounds and claiming he's learning to speak 'Velociraptor', and asking 'are we there yet?' in song - we aren't even going anywhere!!!

Help.