Involuntary RPG Journal Entries

u know what, imma confess sumthin. all u negative nancys n u paranoid freaks n u i-told-u-soers, u gonna sit ur asses down rite on top of ur smart lil hands til da end of dis post b/c i aint in the mood 4 y'alls smartassery, i got sum HONESTY 2 lay on y'all n dats moar thn some of y'all ever done up in ur ivry towerz of bein rite all the time so basiclly wht im sayin is stfu

look. i LIKED rathborne, ok? sure he was all scary n crazy-eyez at first n yellin at us n callin us names n workin us til our weak bodies was gonna collapse like he was saddam hussein n dat lady from teh biggest loser all rolled in2 1, and yeah his face gets all red n blotchy n all his veins pop out n hes from some hick-ass place in kentucky or w/e where they eat squirrels a la scabies, but u know he was tough on us b/c he loved us n he brought us out 2 da ravine so we would secrtly start 2 all luv each othr n beat peacock @ capture teh flag n turn from a lameass grasshoppr emergin from its cocoon 2 a badass ninja warrior n he taught me how 2 shoot a gun and i nvr told anypony b/c i didnt want yall 2 think i ws bein a traitor n he let us watch movies @ trainin n play wit teh sprinklr n listen 2 my awesome playlists n the othr day he even admitted dat teh georgia satellites were baller

but now he done thrown 1 of his own in2 solitary so errything from teh past 11 months wz a LIE n im feelin real betrayed rite now so if u r readin dis FUCK U, RATHBORNE

dat said i will continue 2 luv + tolerate teh shit out of u bc dats how i do, punk.

HOOOOOOOOLY SHIT Y'ALL I JUST SAW ANIKA

THEY WERE TAKIN HER 2 DA LAB

n b4 anypony says "shit kody, were u trippin out lookin thru ur kalaidescope again" no i wasn't also if IVI killz me shortly aftr this entry is posted plz remember 2 play "school's out" at my funeral n make sure it is teh original alice cooper vrsion n not teh fuckin glee covr thx

4 my bday (which b on sunday) (the 9th) (dats 4 days from now) (write it down) i wish 4 errypony i don't like 2 magically disappear from my sight n nvr return

imma tell y'all dis b/c it aint comin true anyway. hey hey, wht can i do.

[Skull & Vols]

dis satrday nite, girlfrands, we gna do sumthin EPIC. u may now discuss amongst urselves*

* but b warned, if i catch u out whinin abt ur feelngs imma GIVE u sumthn 2 whine abt

[SKULL & VOLS]

yo punks

guess what i found in a sportz supply closet n rathborne said i could have as long as i tried rly hard 2 fall on my head and die



let's form a gang. what shoe size r y'all

from da pony's mouth, y'all

Click to Play

[Embedded is an audio file, taken from the harddrive of a technologically-outfitted Rainbow Dash plushie (aw yeeeeah) of the following dialogue from Spanish class an hour prior to this post:

Omar: [From further away] [...] —this is about? Really? [...] Who gives a fuck? Stop being such a dumb bitch about it and get over it.

Sadie: [Closer, louder — jarringly so] Fuck you, asshole! 'Get over it'?! Seriously?

Sol: [Indistinct, with Sadie talking over him] Jam your hype, you tw—

Sadie: [Progressively louder] Don't fucking tell me to get over it like you wouldn't be just as pissed if I laughed if someone stuck a voodoo doll of your kid full of pins, don't fucking tell me I'm a dumb bitch when you're the asshole here, okay, you're the one fucking person who gets it and then I have to put up with this shit? Fuck you!

[Silence]

[Static; end]]

WHEN DIS ASSHOLE LETS ME DOWN I AM GNA
FREE DAISY

WHO'S WIT ME????

yo i gotta interrpt all y'all doomsdayerz 4 sumthn rly important. build a bear got mlp stuffed animals but only pinkie pie n RD, n u know i be rollin in dough now so teh $$ ain't no thang, but gurl dis gna be a real hard decision b/c obvs RD is teh best, but if i get RD thn fluttershy gna be real jealous b/c imma be playin wit RD all teh time n not her and im prolly gna feel guilty 2, but if i get pinkie pie idk idk idk i rly want rainbow dash but look @ dis face



do u evr wish u could just do 1 lil thing w/o it hurtin somepony's feelings??

10 rolos
handful of cadbury mini eggz
fun size bag of easter candy corn
bout 50 bunny gummies, some sour, some sweet
imma say like 100 jelly beans
duck sweet tartz
3 peeps, i couldn't eat no moar
teh earz off the choclate rabbit
half a roll of starburst
6 air heads
blue pez
a lil box of nerdz (pink)
fun size swedish fish
3 twizzlers
a jawbreaker but i didn't get 2 far on dat one (anypony wanna finish?)
edible easter grass (2 cleanse da pallet)

i think imma die but first do y'all wanna place bets on what color my puke's gonna be
(bookie takes 10%, yo)

whoa why is errypony talkin abt davi jerkin it b4 class like dat super intrsting or sumthin. i talk abt stuff like dat all teh time and nopony evr all atwttr about ME. whats so special abt dat punk anyhow. so hes a lil gay. NEWSFLASH, ERRYPONY IS A LIL BISEXUAL, NO1CURR. i could b bizexual if i wnted 2 i just choose not to ovrcome my fear of actual intimacy and dats ok

ftr here is a list of errypony i dont like so stay away from me

hugo
jordana
mike
carter
jet sometimes
amber but it aint personal
don b/c he looks like he h8s me so GUESS WHAT I H8 U BACK
dat mean nurse who made me take a bath
clownz EDIT: and juggalos

no moar pillz, they said. i don't believe it. im tryn 2 tell dis nurse here dat teh rite aid dwn the street be open til 9 and they got teh medz there, they got all the medz. but she won't get off hr lazy punk ass, no siree. n they call dis healthcare.

hey sistrfrands

get yo fingers out of yo asses, we got work 2 do. u c dem bb noobz, teh young, teh unintiated, w/o frandz, w/o food or shelter, all shudderin shakin cryin alone n shit. we gotta help dem. we gotta welcum dem 2 da fold of brothrhood so they may achieve highr glory. xcept.......how do we know they aint punkass bitches gna disturb the groove, u kno? nopony b upsettin teh chill under my watch, yo. we gotta prove dat they r worthy. we gotta put em thru the TESTS.

so imma suggest a panty raid. any othr suggestions?

TO: bad girl lo
FROM: kody

r u in there?

bored



DANCE OFF IN TEH COMMON ROOM IN 10 MINZ

be there if u game but dont waste my tiiiiiime, muthrfuckas. i will be takin bets on the winnar now so ready up them dolla billz

[SKULL & VOLS]
yo anypony got sum hand santizr? i got plan 2 make mad $$ if yall aint chicken

as a follow up 2 audra's q:

how r babiez made?

tyia

[Embedded is a grainy cell phone video of Kody's tween self, facing the camera up close. What you can see of the background is dark and smoky, and the audio is dominated by loud, pulsating reggaeton. He grins without speaking and tosses back a shot, then, trying desperately not to grimace at the taste, takes a long hit from a bong proffered by a body off-screen. He coughs the smoke into the camera, and when it clears, he can be seen cheerfully extending both medial digits in a rather impolite gesture. It is, in a word, charming.]

haaaaaaaaaaay sup y'all. i'm in bed with my mom rn

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

n dats y u dont mess, son

[Filtered to Abandoned Fairground]
r u guys mad @ me?
[/Filter]

man, i was happy as a filly 2day when they were takin out all teh cotton from my mouth n lettin me eat ice cream 4 breakfst lnch AND dinnr. livin teh dream yo, livin the dream. but shit son, if i aint got a lisp worse thn karim now. nopony better laugh or ill fuck u up b/c dis shit b temporary

well now they done taken away my gurl karim's inter- and intra-net access so i hope yall tricks is happy. if u need 2 speak 2 karim u can leave a msg wit me n maybe ill read it to him, maybe i wont. dats as gud as ur gonna get, bitches, i aint nopony's answerin machine.

anypony know if they still got corpral punishment in australia? b/c tbh id rather get beat up then suffer teh cruel n unusual slow trture of zero bandwith, yo. is there a waiver u can sign?

yo if u jizz enough in teh showers, will it rly clog up the drains? food 4 thoght yall, just chew on dat om nom nom.

[Filtered to the Males of 1995, or: Brotherhood of the Conquest, or: whatever the hell they call themselves, idek]

dis pub nite we gna do sumthin epic

[Posted following an epic temper tantrum in the 6th floor boys' common room upon discovering he wouldn't be able to get his dubiously acquired e-bay profits transferred into his IVI account. It went something like this, only he was 5.]

i h8 everything n i wanna go home