Freedomtown IC

This is quite the predicament.

Hello, Galador. My name is John Henry Holliday. But you can just call me Doc.

I intend on staying in Purgatory until such a time that my family comes to me, or until I return to my family. I see that my friend, Nicole Haught, is here, so I can only hope that we're all reunited soon.

Until then, I have some experience running a bar, so I can be found at Shorty's. Considering the current owner isn't among us, I don't suppose he'd mind if I kept the place running for now.

I know that with the existence of Monster Island common knowledge now, a lot of people are going to want to see it. To see the creatures that live there.

Here's the thing, y'all.

We can't go treating this like some overblown petting zoo. This is their home. Would you like it if people started visiting your home just to butt into your business, get in your way, and bother your ass? Hell no you wouldn't. So we're not gonna do that to them.

That said, as the chosen caretaker of the land, I will allow small (VERY small) groups to take guided tours approved and scheduled by myself and Queen Emily. This way we can be sure to not bother the inhabitants, nor anger them.

This has been a public service announcement from the Kingdom of Monstropolis. If you don't like, fuck off.

Emily Wilson
Hey, babe... wanna come see our newest "residents" with me?

Alright. Anyone who knows me knows that I try to do the right thing, even if I end up doing it in a really, really stupid way.

This right here is one of those stupid ways.

When Galador had a single ruling family, they contacted me about helping with something. As some of you might remember from a few years back, two kaiju (Kong and Clover) appeared here, brought by the gem.

Clover was defeated by having a starship explode in it's face, and Kong was knocked out by Ant-Man in a moment that hopefully gave him a lifetime of pussy being thrown at him.

Nobody ever really asked what happened to the kaiju after this, and I'm guessing everyone just assumed the gem took them just like it brought them. Well... that's not the case.

Those were far from the first kaiju to appear here. In fact, the first of them arrived shortly before we relocated to Galador. Trust me, it wasn't just people that were taking up too much room on Knowhere, folks.

So, we picked out a large, unoccupied continent on the other side of Galador, and have been using it as a habitat for any kaiju that are brought here. We've put one-way shields around it, that enable people/creatures/etc to enter the area, but not to leave without having the shields temporarily lowered.

We called it Monster Island (if you love cheesy old monster movies, you get it), and since I was (at the time) princess of a Monster Kingdom, I was told about it, so that I could help oversee it. I wasn't thrilled about the idea of hiding it from everyone, but a combination of getting their reasoning (if people knew about it, they'd be tempted to visit it and/or weaponize the kaiju) and the fact that they told me I could keep my widdle Jason if I went along with it convinced me.

These monsters are not evil. Not in any way. They're more like wild animals... who happen to be roughly the size of skyscrapers. We'd rather keep you AND them safe. That said, a woman that was just brought here, a half-monster called Mileena, somehow sensed the presence of the kaiju on arrival and stole a ship to get there.

We're sending a retrieval team to get her, but clearly this is gonna make keeping the place a secret any longer pretty much as likely as Joss Whedon ever having a career again.

For now, we're still keeping the coordinates private, for YOUR safety. But I assure you, as Queen of Monstropolis (and by proxy, of Monster Island), once this is over, Queen Emily and myself will sit down with whoever we need to, to devise a method of allowing you all to satisfy your curiosity while also keep you safe.

Bea out, bitches.

ROYALTY/SHIELD/RETRIEVAL TEAM
A'ight, peeps. Here's all the info I could get for you at the moment. There's a shit ton of creatures on that landmass and the surrounding ocean. But obviously, the ones to be extremely careful of are the BIG-ASS BUILDING-SIZED MOTHERFUCKERS.

So, here's a list of the ones we've had placed there, along with any pertinent info that could help. 
( Read more... )

I just wanna throw some thanks out.

Thank you to everyone who attended me and Emily's wedding, and to those who weren't there but sent their well-wishes.

Thank you to my friends for being there to witness my special day.

Thank you to Emily for marrying my crazy ass.

And thank you to Stephanie Whitmore and Danny Lawrence for getting so into each other that they literally fucked on my property. Yes, the cameras caught that. And yes, I enjoyed every moment. Encore, please.

I'M GETTING MARRIED TONIGHT!!

So I've done a thing.

Hard to believe how shit works out, ya know?

Little over six years ago, Emily Fitch arrived on Knowhere. She wasn't there long, but we got drunk and hooked up a few times. Had a good time, went forearm-deep in her a few times, then she vanished as quickly as she arrived.

Then, years later, she reappears, this time on Galador. Turns out she fell for me all those years ago, and never stopped loving me. But I was married to Tea by then.

The purge happened, and Tea was taken by the gem. It gutted me, but who was there to help me pick up the pieces? That's right, Emily Fitch. And now... the feelings I'd always had for her quickly blossomed into undying love.

And here we are, six years after meeting, and on April 1st, I'ma wife that woman.

I love you, Ems. I look forward to seeing what I can fit inside you for many years to come.