Some Reality Web

Who wants to stab pumpkins with me?!

I do not like these trees. I have nothing against sentient trees, after all I have Baby Groot but these are evil. He assumes they are family and tries to talk but they are mean to him and try to hurt them. If they do it again, they will meet the steel of my blade.

I could really get used to the convenience of farm-to-table cooking when the farm's right outside the door for pickup. Nothing's better than fresh, and 'tis the season for trying out new recipes. So far the apple cinnamon pancakes have been the favorite.

Side note-- they all tend to taste as they sound. Sweet, juicy, but my favorite: full of tart.

Is there any particular place that these things seem to be gathering? We could a group together and meet them where they are and take them on. They do not appear to regenerate once they're dead.

[voice post]

Gamora, babe, can you maybe grab that stabby sister of yours and scoot around to the vintage record store near the bagel place Carol likes?

Quickly. If possible. Not meaning to rush you [...] but if you could maybe hurry?

There's something visceral about witnessing a half-android assassin curb stomping a scarecrow while calling it a 'pussy bitch'. Someone take away Nebula's subscription to reality television please.

Also, don't let her watch Toy Story ever again.

[ TEXTS TO GAMORA ]

» I need your help to get Nebula's arm back on.
» She still wants to go beat the shit out of some scarecrows with it and I think she's about done with the Buzz Lightyear impersonation.

[Carol]

Are you busy? I thought we could go get some coffee and then I wanted to go shopping. There is an antique store that I want to visit, they have ancient weaponry. I could use
a few thing.

[Nebula]

I have offered to take her out so you should be able to get everything done. Let me know when it's safe to come back.

[ Avenger Types and Families & X-People & Kara Danvers & all kids ]

Today is Carol Danvers' birthday, she has been my roommate since her arrival here and I believe that it is important that friendships have strong foundation. There will be a birthday celebration in our room today. You are all invited to stop by for cakes, party games and to dance.

Baby Groot is planning to have a dance party at 3pm. Because his nap time is 4:30pm. If you wish to dance party with us. Arrive sharp.

You do not need to bring presents. Your presence will be presence enough. However, offerings for the Flerken Chewie will likely mean you are not hissed at.

There will be goody bags if Quill doesn't screw it up. Which means there might not be goody bags.

Please attend our party.

[ GAMORA ]

You have to distract Carol for a few hours. I recommend shopping. Apparently it can take hours. But be home by noon.

[ MORGAN ]

Will you come decorate with me?

Given we've sustained so many losses lately and given what happened last time it's probably time to check in on who's here, and what they can do.

I'm not just talking about fighting. Last time when things went South we had a lot of people step up and help provide food and shelter when it was needed and that's important. Then there's those of you with medical experience, and the ones good with technology.

I don't know if there's still a list, but if there is it's out of date, and I'd like to get it updated.

Last time there was a battle to be fought everyone ran in with their own agenda. Myself included. And while the intentions were good, it's not the smartest way to do things. We need a plan. I'm not saying this is just my call. There are people here from worlds I don't know, and those of you who don't know me.

But I'd like to be ready.

Where the frick am I? This isn't Titan. What am I wearing? How did I even get here?

Mantis? Did you break something?

What the heck is going on?

This uniform clashes with my... well, with me.

Groot and I will be searching the woods for sentient trees, I do not anticipate he will find his kin, however it is something he wishes to try.

Does anyone have a portable music box?

I dislike this.

[ FRIENDS ]
I believe I am malfunctioning. I may be unhelpful for as long as this is occurring.

[ GAMORA ]
I feel everything. I believe my endurance and tolerance have dwindled. It is unpleasant. How do humans deal with this?

A competent and indestructible flyer is required to check the sky. I can find no trace of signal, but there may be a ship in orbit, cloaking its signal. If found it should be destroyed instantly. By any means.

Corvus Glaive and Proxima Midnight of the Black Order are in the city. Do not engage. Gamora and I shall deal with our siblings.

[GAMORA]

We did not get the chance before, I would like very much to kill them.

Shall we?

I am very excited. Look who appeared in my apartment last night! His name is Groot and he's very special to me. I didn't think I would ever see him again. He can only say one sentence so he's not much of a conversationalist but he's very sweet if anyone wants to come by and meet him.

I am always curious as to how no one in these odd places we visit reacts to strange people appearing. Or an apartment building forming from nowhere. Even after events on Earth, my visits were always carefully planned to avoid exposure to humans due to my appearance.

I am unused to a lack of reaction.

[GAMORA]
I need you to come shopping with me. But you cannot tell anyone what we purchase.

[CLINT, NAT, GAMORA]
I have located an event in this place that I wish to partake in. Would you all join in a ghost tour with me?

[MORGAN]
I am uncertain what to get your parents as a congratulatory gift. I believe it is too early for them to know your siblings gender. Do you think they would enjoy a gift experience to somewhere relaxing?

Is there anyone who would be willing to help me choose a dress for the wedding tomorrow? I'm not sure what's appropriate and what is not. There are a few things that appeared in my closet but it's confusing to me.


[Barton]

Since both of us are going to the wedding with people who are in the wedding, would you mind if I sat with you? You can explain it to me since this is a new experience.

[Nebula]

Are you getting nervous? I think I would be because weddings at home aren't like this from what I can remember.

Of all the things that have occurred here, I despised this the most. I wish to hate him forever, those times are

I wish to break things.

TONY&PEPPER
I wish to apologise for any awkwardness that presented while I was regressed.

I hope it was not troubling. But I thank you for your attention.

GAMORA
It is bad, but... I prefer these memories to my own.

MORGAN
Thank you for teaching me tea parties again.

You are all going to be in big trouble if you do not return me to my father at once.

He will rain fire down upon you all to retrieve me so send me back if you want to live.

Who still needs to get out of the maze? Maya, do you have list?

Check in here, I guess.

{Notifs are turned off, so don't be afraid to spam.}

Nebula

Blue, you in that maze? Keep a look out for Nat, yeah? I don't suppose you have any handy gadgets to help with this?

Gamora

Do you want to kill some corn maze? (That reference might go over your head, it's an Earth thing, I'll fill you in later, either way. Maze.)

Avengers (all universes)

On the off chance that one or more of us has not been sucked into that nightmare of a halloween mess, is there an actual game plan here? I'm guessing flying out isn't an option or Tony would've done it, right?