Some Reality Web

[*he's drunk enough for it to be flexible. I'm also good with people having side convos in the comments if they come up.]

( filtered to adult friends; cw for death and alcohol ab/use )

Hello Goodland, I've just arrived here. My name is Maria Hill and I believe I know some people here already?

SHIELD Agents & Avengers

Report.

I was talking to this bloke I was serving asking about fun games and he suggested life-size Angry Birds.

Haven't a clue why the birds are angry or the pigs are green, but looks like fun.

Okay wait. Did I die? Is this like a 'welcome to the next place' type thing?

Why are there ostriches? Who thought of that? Is there a Morose Entity to counteract the Jubilant one?

I'm in a coma, aren't I? Some really elaborate coma.

I have found in my wanderings about, I have missed a lot going on in the past few weeks. What have I missed? Who is new?

If I don't know you, I am Jasmine. I am from a place called Agrabah, I was am a Princess, and I have a pet tiger (not here currently).

Lastly, these clothes are quite unuseful in hot weather.

OMGWTFBBQ.
I was about to enjoy some killer chili cheese fries and now I'm here, fryless. Rude. So is there anyone I know here? Prof? Wolvie? Anyone? X-Men? Guys, I'd even settle for the snowman or something. I need me some replacement fries, stat, and I haven't seen any Sugar Bombs in the store yet, so this girl is about to riot over her missing junk food.

Oh yeah, the peeps I'm sharing a place with, sorry if you hear fireworks. It's going to happen. So.. not really sorry sorry, just warning ya. Fact of life and all that.

I love the name "Jubilant Entity" though. It reminds me of me. I can totally get behind that.

I don't consider myself a violent woman by any means, but I miss the Deep Roads. It was easy to quench the ever so odd violent streak in there.

Are there any lessons in firearm [...] usage?

So I got a job as maintenance at Cogeneration Partners, L.P. They're a green energy company which I am happy to support. I started this week. Nothing like having to stay late through the night last night because of power issues. Fortunately, they gave me today off. Pretty much slept all day, but it's nice to have a long weekend.

Would it be weird to say that this isn't the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me? It might be in the top ten, sure, because being magically teleported about a hundred miles and roughly seventeen hours away from where I was is, gotta say, up there. But also, have you ever fought a giant octopus? Have you ever fought a giant octopus who was actually your brother? Cause that one still takes the cake.

I'm forgetting my manners, though. Here I am talking about cake and octopuses and I haven't even introduced myself. My name's Dick (Detective Grayson if you're nasty) and I heard there were leprechauns here recently. I'm glad I missed that. Not because I have anything against leprechauns, specifically, only that I try to keep my dalliances with sparkly green men to a bare minimum unless they have the word "Lantern" in their names.

So, where's a good place to get some Cantonese food around here? I wasn't in the city long enough to explore the last time I was here.

>> Hey you. Guess what.

( Near Rapid Succession of Texts to Tony Stark )