Welcome to Night Vale

I'm looking for people to join my study group, and by that I mean join me on an expedition through the Library. We may be in there a few days. We may have to face Librarians.

The purpose of the visit is to seek information about this place. How it exists, how it works, all the things that you really should be curious about. Since it is far from being the strangest revelation you are likely to hear this week, I can tell you that I am a magician. A skilled one, not a charlatan. I will also be seeking books on certain rituals and the use of certain artifacts. If you have personal or scholarly interests you need to attend to, you may. There's safety in numbers, and we can all find what we need.

We go next week. Who's interested?

I don't think I'll be watching Fight Club anymore. It was bad enough when it was just Laurel and Sara but watching Oliver fight... Someone said something about a book club? I just need something to do. What I wouldn't give for something to hack.

private to oliver
How are you settling in? Do you need anything?

I wonder if I should close up early. Would anyone be interested in a book club?

martin's friends.

Martin is unconscious in the breakroom and doesn't seem to be waking up. He's not dead but it seemed like a good idea to inform you in case someone wanted to fetch him.

zuko.

I guess we're in charge for now while Martin is indisposed. I'll take care of the business aspect if you want to take care of the tea and coffee.

You know, it dawned on me today that the end of next month will mark my year of being here in Night Vale. Time really did fly by! It's weird, but not in a bad way. This place is constantly being weird, but I have to admit that this place really has started to feel like home for me.

What are some things you love most about this place?

I know it's cliche, but for me, it's the people I've met here that I otherwise wouldn't have back home.

When this is over, I'm taking up gardening just to have the satisfaction of killing plants, since these fuckers won't die.

[ FRIENDS ]

Everyone doing all right? I'm holed up and running low on ammo. For what good it does.

UGH.

The protection seal on of the books in my handbag broken and is now just spewing curses everything. Are there any magic users available who might be able to lend a hand - or a wand - to help me get it under control?

The blasted book has already turned my cat into a teapot with claws, and I can't keep up with it.

I freaking hate snakes. There aren't any parselmouths around are there?

If a curry is food on top of starch...just, as a general category.

Is a loaded baked potato a curry?

Thoughts?

This goes against every rule but

What options are there for those of us with... nonstandard diets?

I haven't had a drink in years, but somehow, I have the weirdest hangover.

[616 Avengers + Arvin]

Does anyone know why I woke up this morning half naked, covered in bagels, next to an e-reader full of Harry Potter books?

[Hermione Granger]

If you haven't already initiated proceedings for a restraining order, I would just like to say that I am so sorry about whatever was going on with me last week.

I swear I am not usually like that.

Well.

I am not usually that much like that.

Hey!
Um. Hi!
Hello.
Salutations
Good evening
GOOD MORROW TO

Hi. Hey? You don't know me, but my name is Tony Stark. I'm not from around here either. So it seems like we have that in common. Like probably a lot of things. I also read books. I could show you. Some of the books, I mean. That I've read.

I mean, I can't, because I don't have them here. But I do have an e-reader. Do you like e-readers? You probably don't, because you like physical books. A lot of book people don't like e-readers. But I make a really good e-reader. Maybe you'd like the one I make? I could make it smell like a real book, if you wanted.

You know, you might like this. I actually read an article in the New Yorker about the reason books smell like that. It's something in the glue, and when it breaks down, it smells kind of like bourbon. Not that I drink. I'm an alcoholic. I mean, I'm recovering, so I'm sober. So I don't drink bourbon. It just, like. It's a fact that it smells like it. You probably don't drink bourbon either, because you're like 18.

I was wondering if maybe I could get your opinion on an interpersonal conflict? You know, because you're very smart and insightful.

Right.

Could someone please just direct me towards the nearest library? I'd be ever so grateful.

I'm supposed to be

Does this mean that I didn't

Hello, my name is Princess Allura of Altea, and I'm very confused.

I wish I had more words, but I'm a little shaken at the moment.

.