Welcome to Night Vale

Today is National Hug A Drummer day!

If you happen to know of any drummers in your life that are deficient in hugs. Today would be the day. Just saying.

In need of ideas to help get your girlfriend to not be pissed at you. Or flirt with seriously everyone and kiss stupid bartenders All I got is flowers and chocolate.


And yeah, alright, so I'm a shit boyfriend or whatever. I'm a work in progress.

BROOKE

do you wanna maybe not ignore me and walk around with like nothing on? this is practically torture catch a movie or something?

It's weird to think it'll be a year here next month.

steve.

Guess it's back to just us. I mean, and Brooke obviously. But El and Tommy are gone so it's just us in the apartment again. Unless you want to invite Brooke.

quistis.

You work for a private investigation office, right?

aelwyn.

Everything just kind of sucks and I need a break. Are you busy?

It'd be great if people stopped leaving.

Filtered to Pete Venkman

So, you realize it's been a year since we've met? Should we count our hayride as a first meeting, even though we spoke a few times before then?

Filtered to HP'verse

Hey, so our group is pretty small. Maybe we should get together soon for a dinner or something?

I'm probably showing my age when I say this, but: I understand FaceBook, I understand Twitter, I understand (but have been warned to avoid) Reddit. What I don't understand are memes. What's an "ok, boomer"? Why is everything "sus"? What ever happened to the cheeseburger-cat?

I don't get it.

Ah, dammit

Pretty quiet today. Could use a distraction. Open for a spar, or a run.

Okay, I'm calling it.

One of these snakes is most definitely a boy, and now I have absolutely got an egg situation. Curse you, St Patrick. On the flip side, tiny little baby snakes? My inner child is squeeing.

As impending grandmother-hood looms on my 20-something ass, I'm looking for a sparring partner. My condition is that you must be invulnerable, and I'm not talking 'oh, I can take a hit', I mean in-fucking-vulnerable. I can throw a tank to the god-damned moon, I don't need the guilt of punching your face through your skull and the healers not being able to fix it.

Hit me up; 1-800-AMERICA-KICKED-MY-ASS (don't dial that, i have no idea what weird kinky line you'll end up on here).

» Ya know what?
» I'm queue'd up at the market and I can't stop thinking about you.

» And the fact that you got to donnybrook with a bunch of dinosaurs.

You know there was a time when my friends and I had to be careful during the full moon. It always caused us to behave oddly, and let's just say that I'm very glad I don't have to worry about that anymore. I couldn't say what changed, but after a while, it was like we were immune to it.

So in the spirit of not covering my windows for the night, I'm going to check out the harvest festival this evening!

Have to say I am a fan of cheesecake.

Not so much celery? It tastes like something from the food synthesizer on the Falcon. Which is to say nothing - it tastes like nothing. And it's stringy.

But cheesecake is amazing. How much is too much? Also, forever open to suggestion for new things.

Hello friends! I have exciting news! Quill and I moved into another apartment because we missed living on a ship together. I am still sad that I do not live on a ship, but I am very happy to be sharing a space with my friend. We are in 908 and I am told that it is customary to host a housewarming party!

I do not think it needs to be warmed as it feels fine to me but a party does sound nice! All friends are welcome to stop by on Friday. We will have plenty of snacks!

» It's probably bad to go to the Devil's party, right?
» I mean, morally.

» I've been thinking.
» You should move to Shadowcrest?

» And also attend Lucifer's party with me tonight?
» Less serious a commitment, but equally as important a question.

That lovely season that I only just learned about, Fall, is fast approaching which means all the spiders are coming indoors to.... hibernate for the winter? Is that how that works? It sounds a lot better than 'lay eggs in our orifices while we sleep so their tiny children have a snack when they hatch.'

They are absolutely giant and no, I'm not scared at all. My shrieking is purely coincidental.

So my question is..

If I get bit by one of those strange spiders do I become a Spider-Pikachu akin to this world like the Amazing Cindy or like... do I just become a Galvantula?

Just for the record I would rather not get bit by anything, while here, so this is definitely not an invitation. I totally deleted my Bumble account specifically for those reasons.

are raccoons like cats? or. like. foxes? i dunno what group of animals they fall into.

googling is failing me, so like, someone else do it? also, what kind of disease causes a wound to go yellowygreen within like... nine hours?

furthermore. do cats sense when you're about to die? is that why they're being nice to me for the first time like. ever?

none of this is for a friend. it's all for me. by now everyone know this is all for me.

I was just asked to file a police report on a stolen ice cream cone. That sounds like the punchline to a joke, I know. It's not.

What I wouldn't give for an actual case to work.

How's everyone else's Wednesday going?

Inspired by the pen I want but can't afford (no, I'm not linking it because someone will buy it and then I'll feel weird about expensive gifts) - if you suddenly found yourself with an unlimited bank account, what's the most ridiculous thing you'd buy?

( Read more... )

Honestly glad that fear bullshit skipped me over

I finally tried Taco Bell. It's terrible and also I want ten more tacos. What the fuck?

Also I'm married now which...what the fuck?

quistis.

Thanks for all your help with everything. I really couldn't have done any of that without you.

jupeter.

So, Mr. Steel, how are you liking this whole being hitched thing?