Welcome to Night Vale

Hello friends! I have exciting news! Quill and I moved into another apartment because we missed living on a ship together. I am still sad that I do not live on a ship, but I am very happy to be sharing a space with my friend. We are in 908 and I am told that it is customary to host a housewarming party!

I do not think it needs to be warmed as it feels fine to me but a party does sound nice! All friends are welcome to stop by on Friday. We will have plenty of snacks!

I'm looking for people to join my study group, and by that I mean join me on an expedition through the Library. We may be in there a few days. We may have to face Librarians.

The purpose of the visit is to seek information about this place. How it exists, how it works, all the things that you really should be curious about. Since it is far from being the strangest revelation you are likely to hear this week, I can tell you that I am a magician. A skilled one, not a charlatan. I will also be seeking books on certain rituals and the use of certain artifacts. If you have personal or scholarly interests you need to attend to, you may. There's safety in numbers, and we can all find what we need.

We go next week. Who's interested?

I saw some pumpkins for sale, so this obviously means Spooky Season is officially begun. (No judgement, Christmas keeps creeping up closer and closer.) Which means that not only do I start my annual watch list (including the new movies coming out), I've also begun decorating.

But in other news, my new merch finally came in. We have; stickers, patches, shirts and sweaters (all in small, medium, large, and extra large), and the very much important little ghost plush. And because I don't really need the extra money, proceeds will go to both the SPCA (as someone claimed by a cat when I went to look in my local one, it's only fair) and other various charitable organizations. If you have something and would like donations, let me know.

The view from up here is quite splendid today! This is the kind of magical mischief I don't mind.

I am really writing with a serious request, however. This should have been my last year at school, and while I do think that finishing my education properly is the right thing to do, there is no appropriate establishment here in which I might do so. I would instead like to engage one or more private tutors, in the following subjects:

Magical Theory
Latin
Arithmancy
Astronomy

Potions
Charms
Transfiguration
Magical Duelling

For each subject you took up, we would meet for an hour or two once a week, and you would if you wished set me preparatory work to complete between those meetings.

My stipulations are that you do not have a dislike of young people, and that you will not ask or expect me to use any muggle machines or inventions as a part of my studies. I shall promise to be a responsible and diligent senior student and not to indulge in magical pranks or anything of that sort. And of course you would be suitably recompensed for your time and effort.

Do write if you are interested.

Well, August was definitely A Month.

I would like to thank everyone who pitched in to help during whatever that whole thing was (did we figure out a cause, or are we filing it under General Night Vale Weirdness?); however dispirate our origins, we're all stuck in the same boat.

The Night Vale Clinic remains open; please don't hesitate to seek our help if you need it, even if all you're really after is a cup of tea and a sympathetic ear. Alternatively, Chauncy the Very Small Bear is an excellent and incredibly soft listener (although not a great conversationalist) and can usually be found at The Black Emporium. I think I remember seeing we've a couple of Actual Therapists in our ranks so if that's you please consider this an open platform to advertise from.

[Caleb]
Does the offer to visit your Magical Cat Tower still stand? I think I'd like about a week's worth of kitty biscuits.

[Zelda]
How are you feeling now? Up to taking a look at something for me? It's kind of urg not particularly urgent.

I have made some...things.

One of them I do not think I can offer as something to buy.

But I am thinking of bringing my other thing to the shop if anyone is in the market for a tiny ball of fire in a jar- it changes colours. But also it can be held in your hand. But it still also burns things.




Okay.

Time really flies here. I was reminded I've been here almost a year which is just...wild.

I've been thinking of putting together some kind of educational program for people who want it. Some combination of core educational requirements, power training for those who need it, and magic for those that applies to. Not that there's anything wrong with the school system in Night Vale except all the things that are very wrong with it, but it might be nice to have something more suited to people who've been brought here.

tim.

So many holidays to plan for this month...

sasha.

It seems like everything's imploded a little with the Archive crew. It's bad when Tim seems the most put together.

How are you doing really?

emma.

How is everything with you? August was a bit of a mess between the serial killer and the hallucinations.

I was kind of hoping that the fight club would be good for some therapy. Turns out I am really only good at fighting one asshole in particular..

But I never got along very well with my therapists back home. I never could get them to believe me and it's hard to be open when you always feel invalidated. But maybe it's time to try again. If anyone has suggestions, I'm all ears.

SALUTATIONS ALL.

So, that was a bit of a fun week, right? This is sarcasm! Please don't take me seriously.

I know that sweet angel of a blond has already left us all the most delightful of cookies -they were super yummy, I feel a little tiny bit bad I stole some other peoples, but not bad enough that I will tell you whose I stole.

But I figured a more emotional pick me up might be needed for some people, so... I'm extending my powers to you all.

I live in 1108 with the decadent and perfect Kore, she is delightful, and if you need a boost of love, or affection, or warm fuzzies, I will give you hot chocolate and a hug. Guaranteed to turn any frown upside down and leave you all gooey inside.

Please note; I take no responsibility for awkward or non-awkward boners or the female equivalent. That is what happens when you are flooded with nice feelings, I get it.

I very rarely miss home.

After these past couple of days, I almost miss my horrible mother.

private to the archive gang + georgie
I'm so sorry for the trouble I caused everyone.

private to adaine + zuko
I'm very sorry for what happened at the shop. You guys did amazing and I really appreciate that.

private to jon
I'm sorry. I love you so much.

[Filtered - visible to all wizards, witches, mages, and other magical people of all kinds, plus Hawke]

I don't expect we shall ever find out whose magical working it is that is causing people to see alarming things that are not really there.

All the same, if you are reading this, I want to say that I think it is very cowardly of you, and if it is a prank, it is a poor one.

[Dob]

Good evening! If it wouldn't be a terrible bother, could I come to stay with you and your associates for a little while? I have good reason to believe that I am not safe in this tower building.

[Hawke and Anders]

Good evening! I hope you don't find it too strange for me to write. I promised Miss Hawke I would inform her if certain people arrived here, and truthfully I never expected it to happen, but I saw him today. The man responsible for a great deal of awful things. He knows where I'm staying and he said that he meant to kill me and he wouldn't be quick about it. If you see a man in a dark robe with a mask on in the hall, please stay out of his way. He is, unfortunately, very skilled in magic.

[Draco]

Did you see Miss Bell's message about the Death Eater? I think I know the man. He's here for me. It's a very long and unpleasant story, but whatever you do, don't open your door to him. I shall have to leave for a while, I think.

[Sirius]

Did you see Miss Bell's message about the Death Eater? I saw him too. His name is Robert Wilkes and he is here to take revenge on me. It's...rather complicated, but it relates to James Potter and what happened in that other place. If you encounter him, it is probably best that you say you did not know I was here.

Hello?

I need to investigate this. I am probably not the first person to go missing from Arkham and end up in another reality. I haven't yet determined whether I have actually travelled through time, but right now it seems likely. I thought I was being very careful. At least I'm not trapped in If you are from Arkham or its environs, please write back to me.

Is there a university here? My name is Asenath Waite, I was supposed to be am a graduate student from Miskatonic, and I really need access to a library. Specifically, I need books on ancient religion and anthropology, and under the circumstances, probably recent history too.

You guys are here, aren't you? It's Egbert.

I don't like this. It's too small to write on.

Did Binbag do this? I tried roaring his name into the sky but nothing happened. A few people stared but nothing helpful happened.

I wonder if I should close up early. Would anyone be interested in a book club?

martin's friends.

Martin is unconscious in the breakroom and doesn't seem to be waking up. He's not dead but it seemed like a good idea to inform you in case someone wanted to fetch him.

zuko.

I guess we're in charge for now while Martin is indisposed. I'll take care of the business aspect if you want to take care of the tea and coffee.

Let me introduce myself this time.

I am Costia. Your home is very different to mine, like something from legend. Here are the things that I like so far:

Phones
Radio
Bananas
Peanut butter
Ice cream
Getting the bus - I want to try to drive a car but nobody will let me.
Arby's
Bowling - but I do not understand the ritual of the shoes.

I want to do something useful while I am here. I can't sit and do nothing! I am a warrior. I know that there is no war here, but I could guard your store from thieves, or teach you to fight.

I too have a question.

If you are mortal, does that knowledge trouble your spirit? My people may die, but we are not mortal, for we die only to return, and we will live on until the end of the world.

Attention Night Vale residents.

We have been receiving reposts since yesterday of a large man in a hockey mask wielding a machete and menacing people, and also occasionally murdering them. We don't have much information but we do know he has been seen around town, according to witnesses, just "all over the place". So...keep that in mind when making your weekend plans. No telling yet what this means for Sunday's farmer's market, but maybe take the week off.

City Council insists that nobody has died, while other sources indicate several people might have died. As many as 20. But considering this is Night Vale, it really could be any number. We can't say for sure how long this whole serial killer thing might last, but we do advise you to be careful. Maybe just pretend really hard he doesn't exist and he'll choose to share in this fallacy.

Not that I am not happy to be out of there, but where am I?

Hakom ai raun hir? Bilaik ai stedaun?

Are we all dead?
I hope we are not dead. I don't want to be a spirit with her fatal wound paining her forever.

If we are not dead, I need to return to Lexa my Commander.
The message says I cannot, but I have done many things it was said I could not do.