Portland Net

Bloody hell.

At least I'm not a girl.

Hello there. The name's Crowley. Let's have a little chat, shall we?

I like to think I'm an all-inclusive sort of chap. And with that being said, I think we could all benefit from each others talents and skills. We all share the same sort of goal in the end, though our paths may lead us there differently. But if the "wormhole" put us here for a reason, let us use that reason to cause mayhem.

It'll be fun. I promise.

Ta!

I am looking for a man named Castiel. Has anyone here seen him?

I'M STILL A FUCKING GHOST

So what's a bloke supposed to do when the girl of his dreams ain't in love with him?

Anyone know where I can get some decent french fries around here? Not fast food. The good stuff, at a place where they change the oil in the fryer more than once a week. I've had a bitch of a day and I need a pick me up.



EDIT: Screw the french fries. Which of you have the Winchesters pissed off?

Private to Blaine's Friends + TFW:

Blaine's in the hospital, but he's not hurt. He's not possessed anymore, and an Angel was able to heal the injuries that the demon caused him. It's probably still too dangerous out there for anyone to try and come out and see him, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind the visitors. If you do decide to visit him, you should probably take it easy around him. He's been through a really traumatizing experience, and he's gonna be freaked about this for a while. Just be patient with him.

TFW Only:

I'm gonna be taking up some extra shifts at the hospital. It's still crazy here, and being home is only going to give me more time to think I'd rather be helping out where I can instead of doing nothing. Don't worry I'm fine. Everyone still okay?

Oh... before I forget... Hey Crowley? Fuck you.

I was just passing by the Grotto, you know, taking my afternoon stroll, smelling the blood and fear in the air, loving it all of course. Don't you feel it? The hate and the violence? It's like bloody Christmas around here! Anyway, I saw a big conglomeration of baddies all congregated here, werewolves and vampires and who the hell knows what else. Seems like a couple of them from different worlds are joining forces and taking civilian hostages. I say civilians, because none of them seem to be the silly, costume-wearing supersaps that I've been seeing around here lately. They're all wimpy and scared-looking.

Anyway, I figured you might want to test drive your new powers on them, save a couple of meatsuits in the process. You know? Do the thing you do. Well... that is if you think you're up for the task. It might just all be too much for you.

I could... always call the Moose if you think he would be better to handle the situation.

Now this is what I call entertainment. Those metal men? Classic. Vamps in every color, shape and size? Lovely. Crazy, bloody humans who skin people alive just for fun? Creative.

All I need is some popcorn and a recliner. So much better than that gender switching thing.

FILTERED TO CROWLEY:

A little birdie told me you might be hanging around here.

If you're in 'about to die' bad situation, pray. Mmkay?

[ voicemail left for dean (not the first one) ]

Dean, it's me. I don't know where you are, or what's happening, but... dammit, Dean, Cas is saying you're dead. Call me back or give me something, anything, just... let me know you're alive. Please.

[ text to crowley ]

» When I find out what you did, I'm going to kill you.

(OOC: after this)
[ incoming call to cas: sam ]

(even later)
[ voicemail for dean ]

Dean, it's me again. (long pause, and a sigh) Look, um. I know that whatever's going on, you're probably freaking out, but running away and getting help from Crowley isn't the smart move, here. You should be letting us help you. I think I... I have a theory about what's going on, and if I'm wrong, I'm pretty sure whatever it is that's happening can't be any worse. Whatever it is, don't... don't try to deal with it on your own, you know that never ends well.

Just... call me back, okay? Or better yet, come home. We'll figure it out.

TEXTS TO SAM WINCHESTER:

» Wake up.

TEXTS TO JODY MILLS:

» Are you awake?
» Have you seen Dean?

TEXTS TO ADAM WINCHESTER, CHARLIE BRADBURY:

» Has Dean spoken to you?

TEXTS TO JESSICA MOORE:

» Are you still with Sam?
» Dean was in bed. Where is he now?

TEXTS TO BENNY LAFITTE:

» Is Dean with you?

TEXTS TO CROWLEY:

» Where is he.

PHONE CALLS TO SAM WINCHESTER:

**INCOMING CALL: Castiel**
**INCOMING CALL: Castiel**
**INCOMING CALL: Castiel**

ANGEL RADIO TO GABRIEL; IN ENOCHIAN:

Gabriel. Find Dean. He has to be here somewhere.

[ INCOMING CALL: Not Moose ]

Oh my word.... This is a marvelous day indeed. Nothing like the smell of a newly-formed demon to freshen up my morning.

I do love when visions of the future go my way. Tah!

Thank the bloody pits of fire and brimstone. I detested being a woman.



And stop with the selfies! Who do you all think you are? James Franco?

This is so not amusing.

Okay, listen up people, because I'm only gonna say this once. If someone wants to say something to me, then you need to fucking say it to me instead of being the little bitch you are and saying stuff to my girlfriend(s) behind my back. In fact, you needs to keep your damn mouth shut about things you know absolutely nothing about.

I'm talking to whoever the hell this applies to, but mostly this is for you, Prancy Smurf. You don't know anything about what the hell I'm dealing with right now. You haven't even bothered to fucking speak to me since any of this happened so don't you dare pretend you know what's going on with me. Because if you thought I was a bitch before? You have no idea what I'm capable of now. Got it?

Consider this your PSA.

A little birdie sang this to me this morning.

Dean and Cas sitting in a tree

B-A-R-F-I-N-G


Remarkable the sort of things you read over the net.

Will the giant bugger doing a piss poor imitation of Godzilla destroying the city please come forward?

I'd like to shake your hand.