Portland Net

Private to Housemates

I know you're all British, but I fully insist we have a Thanksgiving dinner. Who's in?

Private to Serena

Haven't seen you since the zombies in a while. The wormhole hardly gave us any time to recover before body swapping us.

Anyway, get this. I'm trying to get my British housemates to do Thanksgiving dinner. Think you might wanna join in on this? British people celebrating an American holiday. Priceless!

I am not okay with this.

So, finally someone works out how to get me a life (or something approaching one) and the one credible drinking buddy I had has disappeared? Fuck you, Portland!

If anyone does want a mildly-angry ghost as a booze-buddy, feel free to apply within.

Has everyone in this city turned Scottish overnight?

So, Hal's got this plan to make me less-ghostly. If it works it'll mean I can feel and taste and maybe even get drunk again. Fair warning, boys!

We need to talk.

What do people do for fun around here?

[Private to T.J.]

You are not going to believe this! Hal has a double. So, buddy, you're not alone in clone land. God, he's hot, too! And an officer of the law, no less...with stubble!

[Private to Hal]

I thought I should probably warn you before anyone else *coughTomcough* starts making comments. There's a new bloke in town and he could be your slightly-less well-groomed twin. His name's Jack.

Because my week hasn’t been fucked up enough and now I have to deal with this. I’m still not too sure that this is even real. How the fuck do I get back home?

Private to Serena

You know when you get that feeling that something's about to happen, the one where you get cold sweats for absolutely no reason? Also known as paranoia?

Yeah...

Private to Alex

I need you to hold onto something for me please.

Alright, boys, the shit's hitting the fan again, Portland style. Where the fuck are you?

Private to Housemates

Just a head's up. Apparently, there's this big bad dude named Silas who just popped out of the wormhole, looks like Stefan except he's a total douche. He's got so many supernatural characteristics that I'm pretty sure he's made it into the Guinness Book of World Records. Ever heard of an immortal psychic witch doppelganger anyone? Yeah, me neither. But he's real, and he can get inside your head.

So please be careful. I'm gonna be staying with Serena for a while, because she's basically freaking out and with good reason to be honest. If anyone needs me, just holler.

Private to Sam Winchester (Adam and Castiel can read)

Hey Sam. So I know you just got here, and you're trying to get all settled and whatnot, but I feel like you should be caught up to speed with some of the people who are roaming about this place. Specifically this one guy that has a couple of people terrorized just by his mere presence here. If you're interested, let me know.

This isn't normal, is it?

This is elaborate. [...] And distracting.

This is brilliant! No more having to take sneaky peeks at all the pretty people, they're just naked as the day they were born!

Better yet, I got out of that fucking dress! Finally!

lmfao

Hi, I'm Alex and I'm a ghost who's been told to report for work at your modelling agency as a photographer's assistant. Does this sound like the sort of thing you can handle?

Holly may be a few pixels short of a picture but I could be handy to have around. Probably

Aiden? Josephine? Are y

What the hell is going on?

Okay so... kind of embarrassing, but I'm actually at the police station right now.

It's pretty much been a ridiculous day where all I tried to do was go to the supermarket to buy some deodorant and tofu. Well, I forgot that I was a little girl and tried to use my credit card. That... didn't go over too well. So, I said that I would just go to the ATM to take out cash. I really needed that deodorant, okay?

Anyway, I guess the lady at the cash register thought I was some lost child, so she called the cops. And now I'm writing this from the bathroom at the precinct. Ugh. Cops.

Can someone please come and claim me? I tried telling them that I know my way home, but they either didn't believe me or just wanted to give my "parents" a piece of their mind. And apparently, they're immune to a little girl crying, because I tried that already.

When is this crap going to be over? I'm tired of this.

I can't shift out of this.

Why the hell can't I shift out of this?



Please don't do this to me.