Title: Beach Blanket Blowjob
Author: Musyc
Characters/Pairings: Draco/Hermione
Rating: NC17
Word Count: @1800
Monthly Theme: The ABCs of Sex
Letter Assigned: B
Kinks/Themes Included: Outdoor sex, blowjob
Summary/Description: Sun, sand, drinks, umbrellas, everything she'd wanted. But there was one thing the travel agent had apparently forgotten to mention.
Author's Notes: Thanks to the mods for letting me claim a wildcard this month. And no thanks at all to my brain that wanted to make this far more comedy than smut. I fought it the whole way, but I think it won. XD (Also, I am really bad at being subtle. Any hidden theme or word is entirely accidental. >.> )



Hermione pursed her lips at the postcard in her hand. She flipped it over and stared at the picture. Waves licked at a pink-sand shore, a massive striped umbrella fluttered in the breeze, and a pair of sunburnt children waved from behind two giant balls of candy floss. Hermione stuck out her tongue at the photo, then glanced guiltily at the winged armchair by the tall windows. Draco still had his newspaper held up in front of his face and Hermione gave a silent exhale of relief. While she was sure he would agree with the sentiment, she didn't feel like giving him the opportunity to smirk about it.

"Ginny says hi," she said. She pushed the postcard underneath the tea tray. "She and Harry are enjoying Greece. The kids are having a grand time."

"Mm," Draco said.

Hermione sipped her tea, watching Draco's newspaper over the rim of her cup. "Ron and Lavender sent a card yesterday."

"Mm."

"I also heard from Neville. Pansy, Blaise, even Greg. Got lovely postcards from all of them."

"Mm."

Hermione set down her cup and drummed her nails on the edge of the saucer. "Every last one of our friends has sent us a postcard, talking about their holidays, all the lovely places they're seeing, the great fun they're having. At delightful resorts. In foreign countries."

The paper rustled as Draco turned a page. Hermione felt, more than heard, him take a breath.

"Draco Malfoy, if you say 'mm' one more time, I will...." Nothing came to her for a moment, then her eyes brightened. Deliberately, she slurped her tea.

The paper seemed to shudder. With a small wicked grin, Hermione slurped again.

The paper snapped down at the fold and Draco stared at her, one brow lifted. "What do you want me to say? 'Dear me, it does sound like all of your friends are having a marvelous summer. I hope they choke on the umbrellas in their sticky cocktails'?"

"I thought you might comment on--" Hermione waved her tea cup in the air. "Resorts. Countries. Hot sun and sandy beaches. Places we never go."

Draco folded the paper crisply and tapped the crease against his palm. "If you wanted to visit warm places on your holidays, should have listened to your friends and never married someone who bursts into flames when he goes into the sun."

"That was Ron and you know he was joking."

"And we go to foreign countries all the time. We were in Norway just last month. We've been to Russia, Estonia, Finland." He gave a tight grin and put what Hermione considered to be far too much emphasis on his next word. "Iceland."

"Cold places, Malfoy! Every place we've visited in the last five years has been cold! You never take a hint!"

"Hardly my fault if I'm Firemaster for the Fellowship of the Fiftieth. You encouraged me to go for the position. I did warn you," he said. He tossed the paper onto the table beside him and extended his legs to slump into the chair. "I light the fire at all conclaves, gatherings, ceremonies, et cetera, and it's not as if I can do that from a distance. When your organization is all wizards living above the fiftieth parallel, you go above the fiftieth to do your wizardy things."

"You did warn me," Hermione agreed. She finished her tea. Standing, she locked her hands behind her, arched her back, and stretched. Draco's eyes locked on her chest. Hermione gave him a smirk. "But I also warned you, Draco. I can be very devious. I get what I want."

He didn't look away. "Well aware. Potter's speech at our wedding was entirely on the topic of 'take that Malfoy, you bastard, you have to deal with her now'. Seemed a bit gleeful, if you ask me. Maybe I should have listened?"

Hermione ignored him. She took a deep breath and brought her arms forward, pressing them to her breasts. "No more hints. I'm saying outright. I want to go to a beach. White sand, sticky cocktails, sunset glimmering off the ocean waves." As she walked toward Draco's chair, she drew her fingers down the shadow of her cleavage. She stopped in front of him and cupped her breasts. "Beach, Malfoy. Sun and sand and little umbrellas in my drinks and great big umbrellas over my head."

Draco's focus didn't waver. His grey eyes darkened and he took a deep breath. "Beach?"

Hermione straddled his long legs, settled onto his thighs, and pulled the neckline of her shirt under her breasts. Draco licked his lips and Hermione smiled. She tugged the cups of her bra low to expose her nipples. "You want these? I want a beach holiday. Soon. Really, really soon."

He scraped his teeth across his lower lip and nodded. "Beach," he said happily. "Yes. Can do that. Will do that. Tits, please."

"Deal." Pushing her breasts together, Hermione leaned forward. She touched her nipples to Draco's mouth and closed her eyes as his quick, talented tongue set to work.

---

"Oh my god." Hermione covered her face with one hand and spun around, smacking into Draco's chest. "You didn't-- You never-- Malfoy!"

"Well," he said, his arm coming around her waist. "That's not what I expected. You'd think Nils would have said."

Hermione eased her fingers away from her eyes and peeked at the people scattered across the white sand of the beach. Draco had managed to find her holiday for her without going out of bounds of his responsibilities. A nice wizarding beach in northern Germany. Sun, sand, drinks, umbrellas, everything she'd wanted. But there was one thing the travel agent had apparently forgotten to mention.

"This," she hissed into Draco's shoulder. "Is a nude beach!"

"Yeah." Draco patted her hip. "I don't think you brought enough sunscreen."

"Malfoy!"

He exhaled sharply, then gently stroked her hair. "All right. I didn't see this coming. But it's not a total loss. As I see it, we have a couple of options. One, we cancel the holiday and go home. Two--"

"Two, we cast some kind of disguise charm and we strip off like everyone else." Hermione looked up at Draco, perversely amused by the look of bewilderment on his face. She went up on her toes and kissed his cheek. "I was surprised, not shocked. I don't have any problem being nude on a nude beach, not really. I just don't want anyone recognizing me. Last thing either of us needs is a photo in the Prophet."

Draco twisted one of her curls around his fingers. "True enough. Can't you just see the number of complaint letters they'd get about my pale arse and being struck blind? Mostly from Weasleys, I'd imagine."

Hermione snorted and wrinkled her nose at him. "C'mon. Give us a charm. I want this expensive bikini to go completely to waste."

Grinning, Draco drew his wand. "Sweeter words, Granger."

---

Hermione propped her chin on her folded arms and watched Draco's chest rise as he slept. They'd cast distraction charms all around their large striped blanket and the umbrella overhead, giving them privacy to spend several glorious hours totally naked. It had been perfect.

Nearly.

There was one more thing she wanted to do before they packed up for the day.

Hermione gently poked Draco in the arm, testing to see how far gone he was in sleep. He didn't move. She grinned to herself. Carefully wriggling across the blanket, she allowed herself a few moments to look her husband over. Long limbs, flat pink nipples, a smattering of scars, and a pale narrow trail of fine hair leading down from his navel. She pressed a kiss to his hip and let her lips trace down to nuzzle against the base of his cock.

There was a hint of movement under her mouth. Hermione hummed in satisfaction. She dragged her tongue along his full length, pausing to trace the small ridge around the head.

Draco gave a tiny grunt and his cock twitched against her lips. Head tipped, Hermione slowly enclosed the head and flattened her tongue. She waited for a heartbeat, then drew in a breath and sucked.

Draco yelped. His cock stiffened instantly. He sat up, breathing fast. "Jesus fuck, woman," he muttered. He wiped one forearm across his eyes and stared blearily down at her before dropping back to the blanket. "Don't tell my wife you did that. She's the jealous sort."

Laughing, Hermione propped herself up on one elbow. "What?" she asked innocently. "I thought you told me once that you wanted to be woken up that way some day. Now seemed like a good time." She lightly wrapped her hand around him and gave a slow stroke. "I could stop."

"Don't you dare."

"In public? Surrounded by strangers?" she teased. She licked the underside of his cock.

Draco made a stuttered moan and gestured vaguely at the umbrella above them. "Charms. Hidden. Things. Private. Total privacy. Keep going."

"You know you get near-incoherent when I'm doing things like this to you." She stroked him again, adding a gentle twist when she reached the base. Draco's long groan made her wriggle with glee. "Apparently I'm the only person who can get you to shut up for any reason. It's fascinating."

"Uh-huh." Draco shifted his hips. He groped to pat her hair. "More."

Hermione didn't have the heart to tease him any further. Or to tease herself, she admitted. She loved the way Draco's skin tasted. She set to her work with pleasure, sucking his cock until he was writhing and begging under her. His fingers drummed on his stomach, his hips rocked and bucked, and his back arched. Hermione listened for the deep grunt she anticipated, then opened her mouth and took him deep, swallowing around him as he came. Each thick, heated burst went straight down her throat.

She waited for Draco to completely collapse and push weakly at her shoulder before she released him. "Good?" she asked with an arch smile.

"Best." Draco closed his eyes and relaxed into the blanket with a sigh. "Should take holidays on beaches more often. Can't believe you never mentioned this before, Granger."

Shrieking in pretend outrage, Hermione grabbed a fistful of sand. Before she could attack him, Draco dodged. He snorted with laughter, grabbed her and rolled, pinning her under him. "All right," he said. "You were right. Beach holidays are more fun. I promise we'll have at least one of these a year from now on. Satisfied?"

Hermione wriggled beneath him. She caught his hips between her knees and locked her ankles in the small of his back. "Almost," she said. "That privacy charm is still working. I think we should use it to the fullest, don't you?"

Draco glanced down between them and back up to her with a wide grin. "Deal."