Daily Deviant
- there is no such thing as 'too kinky'
Kinky Kristmas Fic: Bad Girls Go Everywhere (Ron/Lavender) 
20th December 2012 22:32
Kristmas Wish Fulfilled for: [info]luvscharlie
From: [info]lunalovepotter

Title: Bad Girls Go Everywhere
Characters/Pairings: Ron/Lavender (with a mention of past Ron/Hermione).
Kinks/Themes Included: Light bondage, spanking, role-playing
Other Warnings/Content: None
Word Count: 3,881
Summary/Description: When Lavender told Ron that all she wanted for Christmas was for him to spice things up in the bedroom, this wasn't exactly what she meant.
Author's Notes: I must admit I was a little intimidated by the "funny" tone, as humor is really not my specialty. But the persistent [info]ragdoll talked me down, and I'm glad she did as I had fun writing it. A word of caution: there isn't really an overwhelming amount of humor in this (although a bit of snark perhaps) but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. Happy Holidays! Thank you also to my beta, [info]almond_joyz, for the last-minute help.



At first, Lavender Brown was perplexed when she saw her live-in boyfriend, Ron Weasley, stumble out of the Floo on the night before Christmas Eve, overloaded with bags. He'd been gone all day, and Lavender, who had finished her holiday shopping two weeks ago, had been left knocking around their flat, spinning all kinds of scenarios in her head as to what he might be getting her. Her list had contained only one wish, and it wasn't exactly something one could pick up in the shops. The look of bewilderment and uncertainty on Ron's face when he'd seen it had been somewhat disconcerting to her, and she'd worried that she had already ruined things with them after moving in together two months ago. The sight of all the bags in his arms and his earnest expression made her wonder if he'd misinterpreted what she meant, and was overcompensating for what really wasn't that big of a deal. Bollocks, she really should have just kept it simple and asked for baking supplies or perfume or something mundane.

This was Lavender's first truly serious, long-term relationship since the end of the war, and the fact that it was with Ron made it all that much more important to her. She had never quite recovered from their less-than-amicable breakup at Hogwarts, and when he'd finally gotten together with that bookworm, Hermione Granger, in their seventh year, she'd assumed it was all over. Everyone said that Ron and Hermione were "destined" to be together, although honestly Lavender couldn't understand what he saw in her. While Hermione was moderately pretty, she was also nitpicky and argumentative, refusing to admit when she was wrong - which wasn't often, granted, but it was still annoying. Plus, she really seemed to enjoy insulting him (albeit in a subtle, roundabout way so that Ron didn't realize she was putting him down). Hermione simply didn't appreciate him. Ron had seemed besotted with her. Lavender wasn't exactly an angel, but even she drew the line at nicking another woman's man, no matter who the woman was and how little she deserved that man.

Which was why it had been such a shock when they'd gone their separate ways less than two years later. Right out of the blue, Hermione had packed her bags and gone off to do a two-year intensive Wizarding Law study course in Germany. Encouraged by Ron's new single status, Lavender had poked around, and learned that he'd made the "mistake" of proposing to Hermione. At first, Lavender had been utterly befuddled by this, as she failed to see how any woman in her right mind would be upset about a marriage proposal from the man she loved - especially if that man was Ron Weasley. But apparently, Hermione had some sort of 'relationship plan' she'd mapped out right when they started getting serious, and marriage wasn't supposed to happen, by her calculations, for at least another two years so she could establish her career. Rather than seeing Ron's impulsive proposal as romantic, she'd seen it as an affront to her sensibilities, and proof that Ron "didn't understand her after all", so she'd just left him.

Her best friend, Parvati, who was very knowledgeable in the ways of men and relationships, had advised her to wait, and not to become the "rebound girl". But Lavender didn't listen. A week after hearing the news of the split she threw caution to the wind, showing no shame in her campaign to win Ron back. She was blatant and obscenely forward, using every clichéd move in the book. Under any other circumstances, she might have been embarrassed by her behaviour. But this was her moment, and she had to seize it. Now six months later, they were living together in her cosy little three-room flat above her bake shop just outside Diagon Alley, along with her temperamental tabby cat, Rufus, who didn't quite understand his mistress's taste in men. And she had almost certainly blown it by the state of things.

She worried her plump lower lip and twisted a lock of curly golden brown hair around her finger as Ron dropped the bags rather unceremoniously onto the floor and then stepped out of the pile. He wiped his hands on his brown corduroys, and then made a sweeping gesture toward his haul. "Happy Christmas, Lav! What do you think?"

"Erm, Ron…love, what did you do?" she asked, sweetly.

His blue eyes sparkled with confidence. "I figured it out."

"Figured what out?"

"What you meant, in your note. You want me to be more…adventurous, right?" He arched his brows and smirked.

"Well, yes, but -- " her eyes skimmed over the bags, and despite herself, she found her curiosity piqued. A smile tugged at her lips. Then she stepped forward to get a better look, her heart thumping excitedly. But Ron blocked her path, taking her arms and steering her away toward the kitchen nook. "Can't I just have one?" she protested. "Or at least a hint?"

Ron gathered her into his arms and gave her a long kiss that made her toes tingle. He squeezed her bottom, and then slid his hands up her curves to cup the sides of her ample breasts through her clingy sweater. Her nipples tightened in anticipation, her breasts longing to be freed from the confines of the industrial-strength bra she was forced to wear to contain them.

"After dinner," he said. "I've got it all planned out." There was a familiar mischief in his expression that she recognised from their Hogwarts days. An expression like that usually led to trouble.

"Got what planned out, Won-Won?" she asked, cocking her head and flashing him her favourite doe-eyed look that usually got her what she wanted. She kissed his chin, toying with the buttons on his shirt. She was momentarily encouraged by the sensation of his erection nudging her inner thigh. "Come on, give me a hint, to hold me over."

But this time, Ron was resilient. "Believe me, you're going to need your strength for what I have in mind," he said. "Now, let's eat. Is that beef stew I smell? Don't tell Mum this, as she'd hex me into next week, but you make the best beef stew on the bloody planet."

* * *

After they had filled themselves with her homemade stew and buttered bread, Ron rummaged through his piles of bags and presented Lavender with a large plain dark burgundy paper bag with sturdy handles tied together with a silver ribbon.

"Take this in the bedroom, and stay in there until I tell you I'm ready. While you're in there, take off all of your clothes - and I mean all of them, including your knickers - and put on what's inside the bag," he said. "You can take your time, because I'm going to need a while to get things set up in here." His voice was calm and even, although she detected an undercurrent of excitement.

Lavender smiled, her cheeks flushing with anticipation. Her spine tingled. She had never seen Ron so authoritative and sure of himself. Clearly, he had put a lot of thought into whatever he had planned. She was starting to believe that perhaps he did understand what her note had meant. She couldn't wait.

"All right," she said, gamely. "How long do you think you'll need?"

Ron glanced around at the rest of the bags, his gaze lingering for a moment on a particularly large one that contained what looked like an oversized suit box. Then he returned his eyes to her. "I'll tell you when I'm ready, Lav." He gestured toward the bedroom doorway. "Oh! But one more thing --"

"What?" She purred, flashing her doe-eyes.

"I'd like for you to think about something while you're waiting."

This was unexpected, certainly, but she'd play along. "All right, what should I think about?"

"Have you been a good girl this year?" Ron grinned, clearly enjoying her confused expression. "Now, go on. There's lots to do in here. Also, don't even try to eavesdrop because I'm putting an Imperturbable Charm on the room."

"What makes you think I'd try to eavesdrop?" Lavender asked innocently, although the idea had crossed her mind.

Ron shrugged. "Well, because I would." Then he put his hands on her shoulders, planted a kiss on her forehead and steered her in the direction of the bedroom. "See you in a bit."

* * *

In the bedroom, Lavender did as she was told while trying not to let her imagination run wild - at least not too wild - about what might be going on in the sitting room. She switched on the wireless to distract herself. With a somewhat disinterested-looking Rufus watching her with his tail flipping idly back and forth, she brought the larger bag to the bed. Her throat constricted and her heart fluttered in her chest like a gaggle of butterflies as she unfastened the ribbon from around the handles. With trembling hands, she withdrew three pieces wrapped in plain silvery gray tissue and fastened with a simple gold sticker emblazoned with the letter "V" in cursive. For a moment it reminded her of the days when her mum took her to Diagon Alley to buy her uniforms for Hogwarts; she'd always liked how the sales witch carefully folded and wrapped each item in tissue paper like a special gift before placing them in the bag. Lavender, being an impatient child, had always wanted to wear her new things home with her, which her mum had never allowed. But in a way, it had been better to be able to walk down the street holding a bag full of new things. The promise of eventually being able to wear them had given her a thrill, even though she knew rationally that dozens of other children were getting the same uniforms. But that one was for her, and her alone. She was special, whether or not her Mum thought she was or not.

Humming along with the Celestina Warbeck Christmas song on the wireless, Lavender began to strip off her clothes piece by piece. She was about to shoo Rufus off the bed, as she felt somewhat uncomfortable with her cat watching her get naked even though obviously he didn't care what she did. Rufus managed that for her by suddenly leaping onto the floor and darting underneath the bed, which Lavender referred to as his "Kitty Cave". It was as though he knew there was mischief afoot, and he wanted no part of it.

"Smart cat," Lavender murmured with a little smile as she pulled her jumper over her head and tossed it aside. She took the floral hairband out of her hair and shook out the thick dark blonde curls that fell just below her shoulders. Then she shimmied out of her skirt and paisley-print knickers, noting that the crotch of those knickers was a tiny bit damp as she tossed them on top of her jumper. She reached behind her back, arching her shoulders to find the hooks on her bra. It was always a massive relief to get rid of that blasted undergarment; her heavy breasts heaved forward and she took a few long, deep breaths as she stretched her arms over her head. Lavender had always been curvy, with wide hips and somewhat chunky thighs. She wasn't fat, although she had put on a few pounds over the years; as the proprietor of a bake shop, it was hard not to. But her body wasn't exactly the type that girls aspired to have - even though the boys certainly seemed to like it well enough (Ron in particular, she thought with flushed cheeks).

Despite her impatience, Lavender carefully peeled off the gold sticker on the first piece, and gently folded back the tissue. She felt the familiar thrill rush down her spine. Inside was a neatly folded pleated dark gray woolen skirt, not unlike what she'd worn at Hogwarts, although it did appear considerably shorter when she held it up to her waist. The next piece was a V-neck cardigan with cardinal and gold trim along the neck, sleeves and waist. She had a feeling she knew where this plan was going as she unwrapped the third piece. Inside this package was a set of white knee-length stockings and - she inhaled sharply and let out a little squeal of delight - a low-cut white bra trimmed with lace. She'd never seen one like it in her size before, and it felt wonderfully light and silky when she picked it up. Where in Merlin's name had he found it?

Biting her lower lip excitedly, Lavender dove into the pile and began to dress. First, she slipped on the skirt, which fell only just below her bottom. Then with a certain measure of trepidation, she reached for the bra. To her surprise, it fit her perfectly and without a hint of the binding on her breastbone that was so common with the thick bras she normally wore. She was comfortable, and she looked incredibly sexy with her breasts pushed up and together; but perhaps most importantly her breasts were well-supported without a hint of strain on her back. She was so happy she almost wanted to cry. No matter what happened from this point forward, this was undoubtedly the best gift she had ever received.

* * *

It had been awhile since she'd worn a Hogwarts uniform, and she hadn't missed it. She'd found them very unflattering and the skirts were itchy. But if it had made her look as sexy then as she did now, she might have actually liked it. She smiled and gave a satisfied 'hmph' as she made last-minute adjustments to her cardigan, tugged up the knee-length stockings, and fixed her hair around her shoulders. The V-neck in the sweater dipped just low enough to skim the lace trim on her bra, which of course meant that her breasts were on full display. And for once, she didn't mind. She would probably live in this bra from now on.

"You can come out now."

Lavender giggled, turned the knob and stepped cautiously out into the sitting room with her hands clasped tightly at her front. What she found was a huge ornate gold gilded chair with deep red velvet cushions stationed on a pedestal in front of her fireplace. A portly bearded, white-haired man wearing a bright red velvet suit lined with white fur and shiny black boots seated on top of it. The tree was overrun with gifts; there were dozens of boxes wrapped in tempting colourful paper and shiny ribbons. The lights had been dimmed, and the entire room was cast in shadow save the glittering lights of the tree. The firelight behind the huge chair made the figure sitting in it seem quite ominous despite his Christmas suit and his rosy cheeks. She stiffened slightly, hesitating just outside the doorway of her bedroom. Her heart pounded.

"Erm…Ronnie?" she squeaked, eyes darting around, trying not to meet the gaze of the strange man with the sharp blue eyes that looked oddly familiar. Then she realised what was going on. She stepped farther into the room, peering into the face of the man in the chair. "Ron, is that you? How in Merlin's name did you do all of this?"

"Come forward, young lady. Ron is not here. You will call me St. Nicholas."

The voice was low and gruff, and if she didn't know Ron well, she might have mistaken it for that of a stranger. But she heard a faintly familiar inflection in his tone, and thus she stepped forward with a smile tugging at her lips. She almost wanted to laugh, but somehow sensed that the moment was meant to be serious. So she held it in as not to ruin the mood for Ron. She noticed with some degree of pleasure that his eyes dipped approvingly toward her ample breasts; she thrust her chest forward just a little more to encourage him. She was so glad she wasn't wearing any knickers. One flip of her skirt and her goods would be on full display.

St. Nicholas spread his legs slightly, and patted his right knee. Lavender was sure she could detect a bulge in his pants, despite their bulk. "Come sit here," he said.

Lavender obeyed. Stepping onto the pedestal, she perched on his leg, shifting around a bit until she was balanced with her toes just touching the pedestal. The soft velvet felt heavenly on her bare thighs and bottom. For good measure, she rolled her hips forward just enough to let the fabric slide along the lower half of her pussy. She hissed, her clit aching. St. Nicholas's arm came around her back; his hand curled around her waist, while his other hand rested on her bare knee, stroking her thigh dangerously close to her crotch. The already snug cardigan felt even tighter on her body, and she felt her nipples harden into peaks.

St. Nicholas leaned closer, so his breath was warm on her neck. He smelled faintly of Firewhisky and something sweet: he must have had some of his Mum's eggnog, spiked with the liquor.

"Tell me, young lady, have you been good this year?" He arched a thick white eyebrow at her.

Lavender hesitated, crossing her ankles. She felt an almost unbearable urge to slip a hand under her skirt and fondle herself to ease a little of the growing arousal pooling in her belly. Instead, she cleared her throat, and met his gaze fully. "Define 'good'," she said coyly, batting her lashes. She pursed her lips and made a kissing sound.

"Mmm, a bit of a smart one you are," he answered, in a tone that bordered somewhere between admiration and disapproval. "Get up. Since you haven't been a good girl, it's time for me to punish you."

Surprised, Lavender slid off his lap. She felt his hand on her back, guiding her forward, and she realized he was bending her over his knee. She felt the briefest flicker of anxiety, following immediately by a rush of excitement. They'd never done this kind of thing before - and honestly, she hadn't thought of it when she'd written her note. She'd never imagined Ron capable of it. He'd always been a bit…clumsy in bed. Certainly eager and enthusiastic enough, but they had no real rhythm to their shagging.

Her skirt rode up as she stretched out across his lap with her bottom arched in the air. She felt his hand slide down the curve of her bottom, warm fingers tickling the folds of her pussy. A low groan escaped from St. Nicholas's throat when he realized how wet she was. Lavender surreptitiously snuck her left hand under her skirt and rolled her thumb over her clit. Her hips contracted, and she bit her lip to keep from moaning. The need to have his cock inside her was palpable. Her body tingled with desire.

She licked her lips, her heart racing. She closed her eyes, trying not to focus on her angry, burning clit. She wanted to roll her hips along his thigh but something in his tone told her not to. Just as she was starting to wonder if he had changed his mind, she felt a hard, searing slap across her bottom. She shrieked, her eyes shooting open. Then came a second slap, followed by a third a few seconds later. The motion of her body jerking forward with the force of his slaps precipitated the soft velvet sliding over her clit, and she felt her climax building. Her entire lower body was on fire. Her breasts felt as though they would split the threads of her cardigan.

"Fuck me. Oh please, fuck me. "

He hesitated, and she felt his growing cock nudge her side. She was encouraged. But then he cleared his throat. "Be quiet, naughty girl."

She whimpered, and closed her eyes again as she prepared for the next slap. Instead, she felt her arms jerk forward involuntarily, her wrists pressed together. A silky red ribbon wound around her wrists, tying just secure enough to keep her from breaking the bond but loose enough so that she wouldn't lose circulation. Then his hand impacted her bottom for the fourth time, and a fifth. The discomfort only served to raise her arousal to new heights; she was on the verge of orgasm, and she couldn't take it anymore. She flung herself upward, arms over her head. She brought them down around his neck, and in a surprisingly limber move, she straddled herself across his thighs, arching her pussy toward the bulge.

"I don't want to be a good girl, St. Nicholas. Good girls are overrated. All I want for Christmas is for you to fuck me hard, over and over again. Fuck me like the naughty girl I am."

She had never talked dirty before, but now that she was doing it, she found it quite liberating. St. Nicholas's hands circled her waist, drawing her closer. She gazed deeply into his eyes, tracing her tongue along her lips. His cock was straining in the velvet trousers. Then he murmured a few nonsensical words under his breath, and the velvet trousers parted. His cock emerged, massive and swollen with veins popping out of it. Lavender let out an involuntary squeal; she'd know that erection anywhere. Then he lifted her off his thighs and guided her onto his cock. With a deep, animal groan, he slid into her up to his balls. She rolled her hips, brushing her breasts over his face.

Suddenly she heard a tearing sound. The cardigan split open and his hands were on her breasts, squeezing and fondling them through the low-cut bra as she rode him with their thighs slapping angrily together.

"Ron…" she moaned. "Oh Ron, this is perfect. It is exactly what I wanted. I love you."

"I love you, too, Lav."

Then the white hair started to change, with Ron's familiar ginger bleeding into each silky strand. The beard slowly evaporated, and the portly stomach shrank. The suit was ridiculously big now, hanging on his frame like he was a little boy playing dress up. But his cock clearly did not belong to a little boy. His hands slipped down from her breasts, smoothing down her back and over her bottom to hold her down as his hips stiffened and jerked up. He arched his neck, throwing his head back against the chair with his jaw clenched. Just as Lavender felt her own orgasm burst, Ron exploded inside of her while bellowing her name. Then his hands moved up into her thick wavy locks, combing through them roughly as they continued to ride out their climax with their lips locked. She lifted her bound wrists and lightly stroked the hair at his neck.

"My Won-Won," she whispered, flicking her tongue along his jaw.

"Told you I figured it out," Ron quipped, with a lazy, satisfied smile on his face.
Comments 
21st December 2012 20:48
Mmm, well done Ron. Sometimes he gets there - and when he does... :)
5th January 2013 00:15
My favorite pairing in all favorite pairings. Ron/Lavender owns my heart and soul, so thank you for writing them!!!!

Bollocks, she really should have just kept it simple and asked for baking supplies or perfume or something mundane.
Heee!!! This is the Lavender that I love.

I adore the idea of cat-owning Lavender and one who owns a bake shop. There's something inherently comforting in that idea of what she becomes.

"What makes you think I'd try to eavesdrop?" Lavender asked innocently, although the idea had crossed her mind.
Oh so coy! You just know she was rushing straight in the room to put her ear to the door! LOL!

She wasn't fat, although she had put on a few pounds over the years; as the proprietor of a bake shop, it was hard not to.
I love the description of her body type. I love non-romance novel type bodies—the real woman is a lovely thing. Also, damn, if I was anywhere near a bake shop (much less a proprietor!) you'd have to widen the doors for me to come inside.

"Come forward, young lady. Ron is not here. You will call me St. Nicholas."
Oh dear god, I am officially giddy and grinning like a loony-bird! Thank you so much. You can't even know how much I needed this tonight.

OTK spanking—one of my favorite kinks!!!

Holy fucking hell—this was SMOKING HOT! Gee whiz! That whole scene will play out over and over in my head tonight.

Thank you so much for that amazing gift. Now THAT'S the Ron/Lavender that I LOVE!
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