Title: Forgiveness Not Given
Author: elfflame
Based On/Inspired By: Forgivness by gypsyflame
Characters/Pairings: Severus/Draco, Blaise/Draco & Lucius/Draco implied
Rating: NC-17
Content/Warnings: Implied incest (from source fic), punishment, cross-gen (teacher/student)
Word Count:~2000
Summary/Description: Snape calls Draco to his office.
Author's Notes: I really wanted to do Snaco, as it had been too long since I'd written them together, and then I read Forgiveness, and I couldn't resist. Unfortunately, the bunny I gave in to wasn't exactly a happy one, but hopefully the two will wake up and realize they deserve to be together. *nods*



Being called to Snape's office wasn't unanticipated. If Draco were honest, he'd have expected it much sooner than it had happened. After all, Snape had been watching him since the Welcoming Feast. The only person he'd ever paid more attention to was Potter. But after six years of punishing Draco at school, Snape had probably expected him to come to see him long before now. It had just been the way things worked. The fact that he'd been avoiding the man would hardly have gone unnoticed.

Draco wondered which excuse Snape would use to say he needed discipline. After all, there were so many to choose from. Picking on younger students; arguing with Potter; even sneaking around the school after hours—though perhaps that was one he didn't know yet?

Steeling himself and pulling his mental shields in place, Draco raised his hand to knock at the door—and was unsurprised when it opened before he could.

"I was wondering if you were going to just stand there all evening," Snape said. His expression was familiar, but Draco was more used to that sneer on his face being directed at Potter.

"I was…" Draco bit his lip, not sure how to explain his worries without it sounding like just any other excuse.

"Trying to find a way to get out of your punishment?"

Draco felt his cheeks heat, but shook his head. "No, sir."

Before he could say more, Snape stepped aside and waved him in. "Come in, then. And let's hear what you have come up with."

"What do you mean? Sir," Draco added quickly when he saw Snape's face darken.

"Whatever you have been up to, Draco, it is to stop now. Is that clear?"

"I…don't know what you mean, sir. I've done nothing but…"

Snape slapped his hand on the desktop, making Draco jump. "Do not take me for a fool! I have known you and your father far too long!"

Draco felt his cheeks burn once more at the mention of his father, and he looked away. "What is it that you think I have done, sir?"

"Sneaking around…you're doing something in the Room of Requirement…what did your father put you up to?" That wasn't good. If Snape knew what his father wanted him to do…would he help? Hinder? Try to take credit for it with the Dark Lord?

Draco could see Snape visibly try to regain control of his temper, though his voice was still stiff when he began to speak once more. "Tell me, and I can…help. It would hardly do for you to get caught by the headmaster or Professor McGonagall. Or one of the other teachers. I can help you, Draco. If you will just let me."

"You can't." Father would be furious. Especially if Snape tried to take credit. Besides, even if Draco could allow himself to trust Snape in this, his other task was definitely something he had to do without him. For more reasons than he could name, even to himself. "Please, sir…if you're going to punish me…can we…just get this over with?"

Jaw clenching, Snape turned away. "If that is what you wish, so be it. But you will come here tomorrow at the same time. And every day. Until you are ready to talk. Is that clear?"

"What? Why?" Draco felt a bubble of fear settle in his chest, making it hard to breathe or swallow. "Sir, please…" If he had to come here each night, there would be no chance to seduce Blaise as he'd been ordered to. Let alone time to work on the cabinet…

"Because I told you to," Snape said, turning away to get the strap he kept for punishing Draco.

"But…sir…"

Snape whirled to glare at him. "Be silent! Unless you wish to tell me what you are up to, I do not wish to hear about it! Is that clear?"

Draco swallowed, then nodded. He was trapped, and he knew it. Not to mention there was a part of him now that wanted to get out of the tasks his father had set for him. If he had not had those tasks, he'd have been here that first night. He'd missed seeing Snape at night. But now…he just couldn't risk it.

"Get into position, then. And if I have to ask again, you will regret it."

Draco felt his cheeks heat, but did as he was told, opening his trousers and stepping out of them, then removing his shirt folding the clothes and setting them aside before moving to Snape's desk and bending forward, bracing himself against the edge.

The memory of the first time doing this was somehow stronger than it had been in years. He'd grown so used to this in the past few years. At home, it was easier to remember why he was being punished, even if he did enjoy what came after. With Snape…things were different. Sharper. In ways he was still unable to name, even after months of trying to understand his conversation with his father at the beginning of the summer. He'd known things were different for a while now, but that conversation had crystallized a few things for him.

Like the fact that even though this had started as punishment, what he had with was more Snape. And though Draco knew Snape felt it too, he could never let Snape know, or it would end. He definitely didn't want it to. Not ever.

Just like he could never tell him about his assignment to seduce Blaise. Draco knew that Snape would never touch him the same way again. And that was the last thing he wanted, even if he had been avoiding this.

Snape came to the side of the desk, and looked down at him. "I think we will make it ten, tonight. And twenty tomorrow. And so on until you're ready to explain yourself."

Draco's eyes widened again. "What?"

"You heard me, Draco. And every number you miss will increase the count by two."

"No, sir…please…"

"What? You think ten is too much?"

Feeling his face heat, Draco shook his head. "Not…not that, sir, but…ten more each day…? Please…"

"Well, if you don't wish it, you know what to do, don't you?"

Draco swallowed, but nodded. He could never admit to Snape why he couldn't say. He wasn't sure now what to do. Going to his father would only get him in trouble He was sure Lucius would just say that if he didn't know how to handle Snape by now, then he deserved every bit of the punishment he got. He could certainly never admit to his father that his true problem was that he didn't want to upset Snape. Whether or not his father already knew, saying the words would only give his father more fodder to use against him.

"Good. Then we will begin."

The strap stung more than father's paddles, but less than the cane. Not that that made it easier to concentrate enough to count. By five, Draco was already losing track of the numbers in the sting of the strap from his blows. His erection wasn't helping, either.

At seven, Draco slipped and said six instead, and Snape, growling, lashed him again, harder than before. "What number was that, Draco?"

Draco gasped. "Ah! Seven, sir! I'm…s-sorry…p-please…"

"Stay silent unless you are counting, Draco. You haven't finished your punishment yet."

Trying to remember himself, Draco nodded, bracing for the next blow, gasping as it cut a path of fire across his arse, barely managing to gasp out "Eight."

The next two were just as hard, and Draco shuddered, somehow remembering to count them, but the ones that followed caught him by surprise at first, and he failed to count the lash that followed the tenth, so Snape hit him again. "Count!"

Draco was so hard now, remembering what came after ten was enough to cause a fresh fall of tears. "Sir…please!"

Snape lashed him again. "That will be sixteen now, Draco. Shall we go for eighteen?"

Draco shook his head quickly. "E-eleven…" he managed, waiting for the next blow. He was burning and tingling all over, and if Snape didn't stop soon, he wouldn't be able to help himself. He was ready to beg as it was. If he had to be lashed even longer…he'd never manage to hold back. It was all he could do to keep the "Please" unuttered with the next lash. "Twelve!" he said, hoping that being quick about it would keep the word from slipping free.

Snape's blows never faltered, and the sting grew until even the throbbing of Draco's erection faded, the only thing he was able to concentrate on any longer the next number, until he managed to stutter out "Sixteen," and then it was over, and Draco's face was soaked with tears. But he knew the punishment was not over.

But when Snape stepped away, the silence grew between them, and Draco realized why that couldn't happen. Not today. Because he couldn't put into words why he was being punished. Even though they both knew.

"Well?" Snape asked, his voice acid.

Draco felt his cheeks burn again. He knew what Snape wanted, and he wished he could give him what he expected. He searched desperately to find a way to get forgiveness from Snape without telling him what he'd been up to. But he knew Snape wouldn't allow that.

But he had to try. "I'm sorry, sir," he whispered, hoping that would be enough. If not, perhaps begging would? It had always softened him before.

"And what are you sorry for?" Snape asked, his voice still angry.

Draco winced, and his cock gave a throb, even as a tickle of fresh tears sprang to his eyes, hatred for his father rolling in his stomach. "That I…can't tell you, sir."

He jumped when Snape slammed his hand on the desktop. "Out. I don't want to see you again until tomorrow evening."

"What?" Draco looked up at him, eyes wide. This wasn't how this worked. Surely Snape wouldn't leave him like this? "Please, sir…"

"Get out! Now!" Snape's face was scarlet and ugly, and Draco shied away from him, trying to ignore the pain in his heart and the throb at his groin as he turned to get his clothing. He deserved this, and he knew it.

"Yes, sir," he said softly.

Every long, stretched-out moment hurt. He kept expecting Snape to stop him. To take what he always had. But Snape turned away after only a moment, and Draco felt something shatter inside him. A fresh well of anger at his father erupted shortly after, and it was the only thing that allowed him to finish dressing with any dignity at all.

By the time he was fully dressed, his erection was mostly a memory. Even if his heart still ached. He glanced at Snape once more.

Snape didn't bother to turn to look at him. "Get out. I will see you tomorrow at the same time. And if I have to come find you…" Snape left the threat dangling, and Draco winced. He didn't want Snape angry at him.

He had to fight with himself for a few minutes before he could turn away. "Yes, sir. I'll…be here."

It was a long few steps to the door, and every second that passed, Draco expected Snape to pull him back. To keep him here. To forgive him—somehow. But he didn't. And each step closer made him ache inside a bit more.

When he reached the door, he turned to glance at Snape one last time. His heart stopped for a second when he saw Snape was looking at him, and the expression on his face cut deep.

He was used to disappointment from his father, but the mixture of disappointment and longing on Snape's face cut so much deeper than any of the disappointment he had ever faced from his father. It was almost enough to make him turn back to him and beg his forgiveness. Then Snape turned away, and the moment was lost. But a thought kindled in Draco as he reached for the door. If Snape's forgiveness meant more than his father's…perhaps the choice had already been made for him?

It gave him a lot to think about as he headed back towards the Slytherin common room.