I really appreciate Percy's process of sublimating his loneliness and homesickness and horniness into his fantasy of Sally, and how he teeters on the edge of her reality. He knows but doesn't want to know, and yet, it's clear that he could easily slip—that said, I'm not that worried about him slipping.
And despite Percy's care of Sally, there is something so convincingly selfish about his characterization here that resonates with me; I don't like it, but it's real, and your story feels real: Percy at his best and worse, most desperate and self-assured—you've balanced everything quite nicely here.
And despite Percy's care of Sally, there is something so convincingly selfish about his characterization here that resonates with me; I don't like it, but it's real, and your story feels real: Percy at his best and worse, most desperate and self-assured—you've balanced everything quite nicely here.