Severus smirked. “Indeed.” It took two swishes of his wand to remove it. Levitating it before Weasley, he said, “Souvenir?”
Growling under his breath, Weasley leapt off the examination table and dashed out the door. Potter coughed. “Thanks.”
Severus hummed. “Learn from Weasley’s mistake. Avoid fornicating with fruit.”
Potter grinned. “Oh, I only stick my dick inside arseholes.” Glancing at the thing still floating in the air, he shuddered. “That looks too much like a—”
“Quite.” Severus smirked. “So, are you currently—?” He paused.
“Seeing anyone? No.” Potter gave him a slow once-over. “You?”
“No.”
Potter nodded. “I’ll be back, I just need to check on Ron.”
Severus inclined his head. “Very well. And Potter?”
“Just fix it!” Weasley, face red, averted his face. Potter stood behind him not even trying to conceal his amusement.
Lips pursed, Severus examined the…fruit? Vegetable? The thing Weasley’s cock was…inside. “How does it feel?”
“Does it matter? It…won’t come off.”
“Do you frequently stick your dick into unsuspecting flora?”
Potter laughed out loud.
“No!” Weasley huffed. “Please just…get it off!”
“You’re sure?” Severus murmured. “Did you…get off?”
Potter was making choked noises.
“I hate you,” Weasley growled.
Severus smirked. “Indeed.” It took two swishes of his wand to remove it. Levitating it before Weasley, he said, “Souvenir?”
Growling under his breath, Weasley leapt off the examination table and dashed out the door. Potter coughed. “Thanks.”
Severus hummed. “Learn from Weasley’s mistake. Avoid fornicating with fruit.”
Potter grinned. “Oh, I only stick my dick inside arseholes.” Glancing at the thing still floating in the air, he shuddered. “That looks too much like a—”
“Quite.” Severus smirked. “So, are you currently—?” He paused.
“Seeing anyone? No.” Potter gave him a slow once-over. “You?”
“No.”
Potter nodded. “I’ll be back, I just need to check on Ron.”
Severus inclined his head. “Very well. And Potter?”
“Yes?”
“Don’t bring any fruit.”