We've been through a lot, lately. We've lost loved ones and colleagues, and this war has left gaps behind in our lives, whether it was because someone left Atlantis or because they were lost in the battle. I won't lie and say that those holes ever fill in entirely. My truth is more that you learn to live with them, and you learn how to support the ground that's left, so it doesn't all crumble. There are always going to be moments where I think about the friends I've lost, and one in particular. I often find myself wondering what he would say about the person I am now, about the choices I've made - especially when it's one that has put me in the crosshairs. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, all of these moments have a tendency to stir up immense emotions. Or they don't - and that's okay, too.
There's usually a lot of talk about the stages of grief, but I don't like to talk about it that way. That way makes it sound like there's a specific timeline, specific steps we all take, when that is rarely the case. Grief differs between people, it differs day by day, and that's all completely normal. What you feel right now might be different from the person next to you. It might be different from how you feel tomorrow, or a week from now, or six months from now. It's not linear in the way we've been lead to believe. Sometimes you cycle back to emotions you've already felt. Anger, regret, helplessness, betrayal, loneliness, isolation, disbelief, even thankfulness - this can all be part of the process. You might have trouble sleeping. Your appetite might change. You might just feel tired, or maybe you'll feel energized and like you can accomplish a whole lot in one day. You might be angry at the person who is gone, or at those who took them from you, or at yourself for thinking you didn't do enough. There's no one way to grieve for someone or something.
Lean on each other. Be patient with one another. And remember our doors are open for anyone who wants to talk. Or you can message me here if that's more comfortable.