NO EXITS

( ... )

BUCKY.

Thank you.

Okay, real talk. Does anyone out there do like, tarot cards? Or some kinda channel-ey mind powers-ey thing. Could even be a Zoltar crystal ball, I don't care.

Also if you see a watermelon with a face around, it's mine. It donated some seeds for a garden in the green clearing so we might have watermelon sangria soon if anything is actually allowed to grow here, you're welcome.


( private message - dan )

I want off this ride. Why is it that in every universe I'm an outcast?

[TW in comments for alcohol withdrawal talk.]

DERLETH ATTACKS!!! DAY 7!!!

This has been fun, hasn’t it? Idyllic suburban life was usurped by an alien incursion with a 50-foot alligator overlord. Some fought back, some fell, and some became brainwashed by pods to do the bidding of the Lokian Empire and the Supreme Loki. But every Sci-Fi movie has to tie up loose ends and send the audience home with a sense of resolution, right?

Around day 5 of this week, a number of Dunwich’s residents snapped out the thrall of a life that was not their own. Then, those with powers and abilities began to see those restored. Bad news for the Lokian Empire! They counted on the submission of weak Earthlings, and specifically did not include a countermeasure against Derleth’s ragtag community coming together to mount a siege on the Lokis center of command: Town Hall.

( Ready for the final push, team? )

The university is overrun. We need a place to regroup. What about the high school?

Check in. Who needs help?


(OOC: Eliot doesn't realize their are Lokis or pod people not on their side, so this post is not filtered.)


[MAGICIANS + FRIENDS + TIM]

Where are you?

Oh? Did you think this was going to be some cute Leave It to Beaver sitcom all week? Well, I hate to break it to you, but this reality just slipped into 1950s B Movie territory.

ALIENS from the PLANET LOKI have been LIVING AMONG YOU! Now is the time they’ve decided to STRIKE! Their sleeper agents go ALL THE WAY TO THE MAYOR as COSMIC BRAIN REPROGRAMMING RAYS emanate on strange signals coming from A GIANT SPACE LIZARD!

THE ATTACK HAS BEGUN!!!

( Details! )

WYNONNA:

Have you been gardening in the backyard?

[Later, after Dan and Wynonna burn down the shed behind the inn]


LYDIA:

Pack a bag. We’re leaving town.

Dunwich Public High School is having its homecoming party very soon. We are still looking for volunteer parents for chaperone. Please reach out to me if you would like to volunteer your time.

Think of it as community service, preventing teen drinking by standing by the punch bowl to make sure nobody spikes it.

Filter: High School Teachers

This is a reminder that we will be having our monthly staff meeting this coming Thursday at 4PM for anyone who is able to come. I've taken into consideration previous suggestions on how to increase incentives for people to actually show up, so I've put in orders for coffee, bagels, and sandwiches this time. No promises this will continue. Principals don't exactly make Top Boss level money.

Filter: Darcy Lewis

I need a sisters' night out at some point this week.

Ready for a blast of a time tonight, ladies and germs? I can't think of a better way to spend that hard-earned bread than to come out and see me, Richie Tozier, at the theater - got a new act and new jokes at the ready, a variety show you won't want to miss. Sixty-nine cents a ticket, come one, come all!

By the way, did you hear about this guy Tom who was getting a check-up at the doctor's office? "I have good news and bad news," the doctor says. "The good news is that you have twenty-four hours left to live." Tom is flabbergasted, he says, "that's the good news?" But then the doc says, "Bad news is I should have told you that yesterday."

( cut for image, for purposes of ~visual aid~ and gail made the banner, thanks gail )

Looking for an evening of spine-tingling chills, supernatural thrills, celestial secrets, sinister scares, and spectral confessions? Search no further! The Keystone Inn Seance will take place this Wednesday promptly at 10 o'clock. All are welcome! (Provided that you're at least eighteen years of age and not afraid to get a glimpse into the afterlife.) Cost is $2 per person. 9 seats available. First come, first serve! And while we can't guarantee which soul will be filling that tenth seat, we can promise that it will be someone from the other side. WYNONNA: Were you able to replace that bell in the parlor? I want to make sure it gives a clear ding during the performance. The sound was a little too tinny last week.

( ... )

[Voice to Text Post]

A lot of people mentioning how they feel like they're being watched and/or having nightmares.

Anybody else NOT experiencing these things?

Well I'm glad I wasn't crazy, but I'm not sure if I'm happy this monolith showed up finally.

( ... )

( ... )

I do not want anyone to be surprised should they see me in the corridors; it is not my intention to frighten anyone. However, I will be staying in my quarters for the remainder of this week should I be needed.

Let's try to stay quiet while whatever dumbass plan plan Strange is working on. I'd rather not draw attention to the rest of us.

DAN TORRANCE:

Hi Dan, I know we haven't spoken much before, but I wanted to check in to see how you were doing. It can't have been easy seeing what you did.

ROCKET:

You okay?

Okay I know things are super bad and I should ca and all and there are scary monsters outside but what's up with the second and third floors of this place? Sometimes I think I hear voices behind the doors and I've tried sliding notes under them to tell them to shut up but it doesn't do anything?

Also why is the west wing empty? And if it's so empty, why are the doors locked? Doesn't the president live in the west win

[FILTERED AGAINST LOKI (MCU)] I don't know if anyone is friends with the obnoxiously emo long-haired Loki, or if he's even alive, but that other guy from his world just died saving my life. Fandral, I think his name was? I would reach out to Loki myself but he seems kind of histrionic and he killed me during amnesia week. And I'm afraid he might get hysterical and get the rest of us killed cause more problems for us. So, if someone here thinks they can break it to him more easily then we should probably jump on that before he comes across the corpse outside of Butler Hall. [...] My condolences to anyone who was close to Fandral. Or to Wynonna. If anyone needs me I'll be in my room because apparently these things can kill both gods and really badass monster killers and that's a little disconcerting.

( . . . )

Anyone got a bottle of whiskey I could trade for?

Great. More eldritch horror monster fucks. Just what I've always wanted.

[ELIOT WAUGH]

I'm hiding out in my room for the foreseeable future after I try to get some food and not die in the process. You're welcome to join me.

Hey, everyone do me a quick favor and find a stable and safe place to hang out for the next 15 minutes? Preferably one that isn't near the squirrels, just in case. We accounted for the squirrel factor, but y'know. Science is about the journey to the right answer. And maybe even the friends we all make along the way...

Long (tall?) story short: Rick and I think we have this thing all figured out, so brace up!

[[OOC: Here's the inflection point of the plot! Campus will return to normal size the morning of Day 6. Your character is welcome to remain size-altered if you'd like and would like to keep exploring that.]]

[Private to Loki & Fandral]
I'm back to my correct size so if you two are still interested in that threesome, I'm game.


[Private to Dan]
Are you still a giant or did you get that girl to cry on you?

[Text to Dan]

So... what nonsense are you dealing with this week? I'm about two and a half feet tall and highly irritated.

I have an absurd amount of money left over so if anyone wants to join me at Via Napoli for dinner tonight, let me know and I'll make reservations. The more the merrier. Who knows when we'll get a chance to eat pizza again, right?

[Stevie]

You settling in okay, kid? Anymore pink mishaps?

[This is a video recording. It starts with a very unflattering shot of a very drunk Rick Sanchez. The camera quickly flips. It's half Victorian Frankenstein type lab. The other half is piecemeal parts that have been built from other things.]

I'd ask which one of your fucking dillholes have been in my lab, but no one's dead body is outside the lab's entrances.

[A loud belch. Followed by a nauseating swerve of the camera. In a tank, floating in clear fluid, is what looks to be a human-sized Wasp version of Rick. In the background is what looks to be a 14 year old boy in a yellow shirt. He's sitting on the floor, slumped against the wall. The top of his head is open, revealing mechanical pieces.]

Where the fuck did all this shit come from?

[Rick presses a button on a blue box and out comes a blue alien creature who yells:]

I'M MR MEESEEKS, LOOK AT ME!

[Mr Meeseeks's arms are up in the air, daring you to look at him. Rick groans.]

Mr. Meeseeks, close Mechanical Morty's head.

[Mr Meeseeks does, and then POOF disappears.]

NONE OF THIS SHIT DOES ME ANY GOOD.

It's nice to have a body again after that madness last week. Thank you to whoever's in charge of this place and gave me my own room (no offense, Margo).

To whoever might be Sam Winchester's roommate - is he untied yet?

And are we seriously in Florida? Or is this a fake version of Florida?

FANDRAL.

Stop Allmothering me.


DAN.

We good?


WANDA.

Training? First day of the new week? Bright and early? You can bring breakfast.

Who's haunting the cafeteria by stacking chairs?

A lot has happened, I thought we could share what we know.

I think the network is connected to all of this somehow. This isn't something I know, more like a theory, but a couple months ago we were on an alternate Derleth. My other self used magic to create an unhackable network, but I don't remember most of it. It feels like it may have actually connected us somehow, even across alternate timelines. I think it's why when most people disappear, sometimes it's a different version or timeline that appears in their place.

And speaking of disappearances, I asked The White Lady where people went when they disappeared for my wish. They go home, is the short answer. It's hard to put the knowledge she gave me into words but the time they spent here folds in on itself, it's there but they don't remember, like it never happened. I know that knowledge won't be a comfort for all of you. Sorry.

I would have brought up the information from my wish sooner but shit happened like it always does.

Anyone else care to share anything they've learned?


[TONY STARK]

[Photo Attachment: Julia's notes of how much of the potion she tried and the effects, detailing observations of healing after three small doses.]

[GUY WHO SHOT HER]

Hey. I don't blame you. You did what you had to do.

Well that fucking sucked.

Who died? Who's still here?

Did I see Quentin and Alice on the network? Coldwater, get your sexy ass over here so I can kiss you. I'll kiss you too, if you want, Quinn.


[Private to Eliot]
Are you okay? Where are you?

I wish I could eat popcorn and watch everyone take that murderous arsehole down now that they know who it is. Finally.

[posted after Loki finds Rick's body]

Sorry to break it to you guys, but someone killed grandpa.

WHO: Wynonna Earp, Dan Torrance
WHEN: Day one, first thing in the morning.
WHERE: Their dorm room
WHAT: When they wake up, they wonder who they are.
TRIGGERS: TBD

( ''Oh no, what did I do?'' )