NO EXITS

Okay, who's tagged themselves? Let me know and I'll cross your name from the list. The results of the census spell for our side:

Malachi Allen Aziraphale Bucky Barnes Sydney Barrett Bill Batson Baymax Kate Bishop Tandy Bowen Sharon Carter Carver Rupert Chatwin Hugh Christian Ciri Caduceus Clay Lara Croft Rey

Orlin Dax Percy de Rolo The Doctor Elsa Fandral Fen Geralt Margo Hanson Alison Hargreeves Steve Harrington Jo Harvelle Eleven Takeshi Kovacs Loki Laufeyson Loki Laufeyson Sylvie Laufeydottir

Erik Lensherr Wanda Maximoff Mobius Laura Moon Matt Murdock Kady Orloff-Diaz Pikachu Peter Parker Alice Quinn Harley Quinn Ben Reilly Rocket Natasha Romanoff Kylo Ren John Silver River Song

Alina Starkov Ava Starr Timothy Stoker Stephen Strange Mad Sweeney Seventh Sister Thor Odinson Richie Tozier Vax'ildan Eliot Waugh Julia Wicker Joseph Wilson Rose Wilson Sam Wilson Sabine Wren Yennefer

[CADUCEUS CLAY + ALICE QUINN]

You're my plan B. What do you need to possess or move anyone that dies or refuses to tag their own?

[LOKI (EACH FILTERED SEPARATELY)]

I need help finding mine. Can't tell if she's avoiding me, but locator spell isn't working.

So, many of you have expressed reservations and distrust around your other half. They're hard to get a read on, they've obviously been through worse than we have, and most of them look like they weren't in the best shape to begin with based on what I'm reading. Are we in agreement so far?

Most of you weren't here a few months back, but someone stumbled onto a cursed karaoke machine. The whole campus went pop-rock musical for the week. I swear, it was not like Schmigadoon, the musical numbers were better. The point is, people sang what they were feeling. Unlike Schmigadoon, they didn't have the option not to sing, everyone broke down eventually.

My ideas are...

Option One: the most drastic option, we release the karaoke machine for a day or two, hide it somewhere on campus, see what kind of songs the other side ends up singing. Pro: we'll hear everyone sing. Con: we'll hear everyone sing.

Option Two: slightly more subtle, we throw a party with karaoke. I can enchant the stage so only those who volunteer to sing reveal how they're feeling once they step up to sing. Pro: not everyone has to sing. Con: not everyone has to sing and we might miss something.

What do you think?

Hugh, the party last night was fun and just what some of us needed. Thanks for hosting, though let me help you next time. Eliot and I were the queens of ragers festivities at the Cottage back in school.

Fen, what did you find out about that Tim guy? Anything?

Everyone else, is there anymore booze on campus? I could really go for a triple vodka tonic right now.

Hey we have a few vampires here that helped out during the wampa attack. If you're able to, can you please come to the clinic and donate blood? No biting necessary.


[BAYMAX/MEDICAL TEAM]

Sorry to spring this on you. Can you help with this? There's someone in need but I'm not sure if they want to be named specifically. I said I would round up volunteers.

*So technically this should have happened back on day two/three after this, but I'm posting it now. Liberal doses of handwavium applied.

PRIVATE TO ELIOT WAUGH

You've barely talked to me since I showed up. Did the last version of me that was here piss you off or something? Like, what's up?

Oh, come the fuck on. Did someone piss off the White Witch from Narnia or something?

By the way, El, I had to dig that paper airplane of yours out of a tits high snowdrift. You better have a drink and something warm for me.

My tits are freezing. Pretty sure I already got hypothermia in my nipples.

I miss something?

My dearest friend,

Welcome to Derleth.

I am so sorry I could not be there to greet you myself, but I trust you'll find your way around soon enough. Most of the students have not yet arrived for the new semester and so I've arranged for [your?] lodging on campus. You'll find a key in your pocket. Just like old times, eh?

Should the experiment go as planned, for one week we will be able to displace time and space itself. I believe with my calculations we will be able to control the effects and no one shall be the wiser. To anyone not directly involved it will be imperceptible.

Feel free to wander the campus in the meantime. We'll begin the experiment at [muffled] Hall, on Thursday, precisely at midnight.

We'll show them, won't we?

Un Sacrificium Parvis ob Adagnitio.