NO EXITS

I'm going to down this champagne and then I'll go look for Teddy.

Also, hi. I'm new to all this. Call me Billy. I really liked the paper airplane. Nice trick. How'd you magic that up? Like, I'm self taught but I never thought to do that. Be a good thing for the groups I've been in for sending secret messages...

I drink coffee, not tea, but I think I found my favorite souvenir and I'm absolutely buying it.

Ok, but hear me out. "Just know that none of us mean you any harm” sounds like something a mad scientist would say while his evil assistant comes out of nowhere and sticks a syringe in your neck. Especially with that creepy voicemail. Just saying.

The letter said this place runs on an internal calendar. What day is it? And is that really Disney World, or one of the dangerous circumstances mentioned in the letter, where the whole point is to make you think it’s Disney World, but it’s really, I don’t know, a supervillain’s lair? Actually, that would be a pretty kick ass lair. The castle especially. Or the big round ball thing. I’ll bet it’s cool on the inside. I’ve never left Pennsylvania before, well, unless you count the Rock of Eternity, but that’s technically another realm of existence, which begs the question so really hoping it’s the real thing.

IKEA HEIST PEOPLE:

Shrink ray and anti-shrink ray is a-go.