blackpoint - the au community

I'm going to be taking a break from school, so who wants to hire a very employable young adult? I can type around 93 wpm, am team player, have excellent communication skills, very good phone manner, can file like no one else, capable of using computers like a non-old person, and love to research. Also, I took self-defense courses at Snow's & Charming's School of Kicking Ass if that counts for anything.

Please hire me. I don't want to be a mooch.

FILTERED TO HOOKHATTER FAMILY + SIGNIFICANT OTHERS:

That time has come, family of mine. MSF is sending me (us) to Syr Lebanon for a couple months. I'll have my phone and some network availability, but Chase'll probably end up with more free time than me since he's usually with the kids or doing jack-of-all-trades stuff. We're headed out this coming weekend.

Stay out of trouble, don't panic if you don't hear from me everyday and email me with general life updates? There's always teleporter options if there's an emergency, but it has to be an actual real emergency.

Make sure Liam stays up to date on his vaccines, and everyone get your damn flu shots.

so if i'm not public and dinosaurs aren't real if say a hypothetical fucker says he's gonna sue cause i knocked his teeth out and then OL bit his arm he doesn't have a case yah?

should've let her finish him. this is a fucking headache.

I gave this lecture to my students earlier today, but given that we have plenty of students here on the network, I figured why not share?

It's nearing the end of the school year, and we're all sick of each other and want to go lay in the sun, but since exams are on the horizon, our suffering's going to continue. Sorry, life's not fair. However, here are some tips for studying that helped me when I was your age and hated smug bastards like myself. See, I'm not particularly smart. I do all right, but I leave the heavy thinking to my girlfriend. But you don't have to be smart to do fine in school if you have a few tricks up your sleeve, and no, I don't mean writing the answers on your wrist and then asking to go to the bathroom during a test; unless you have a goddamn doctor's note you're going to hold that, sir or ma'am.

But yeah, tricks. Tricks like:

• Sleep. Not like, taking a nap forever to put off actually reading the chapter, but get at least seven hours of sleep before a big test. Your brain remembers shit better after a good rest because biology; I don't know why because I'm not a science nerd, but I swear it works.
  
  
• Make up a rhyme to remember stuff. If you're really fucked, put it to music. Your brain is wired to remember words when they're attached to a beat, and to this day the only reason I remember how the hell the Spanish-American war got started is because I memorized "The Maine exploded and was damp / Cubans were sent to concentration camps / They were starving as they hung around there / but in the US, sympathy went spare / They had guns, they had men, they had knives that cut / and in hardly any time, we kicked Spanish butt". I mean, it's pretty terrible to rhyme shit around concentration camps, but I got a solid B on that essay, and I still remember it to this day, so whatever. You do you. Just don't sing it out loud because that's really terrible and offensive.
  
  
• Flashcards are a classic not because flashcards are actually magic, but because you had to write them. Writing makes an extra area of your brain work, so you're more likely to remember whatever you write than if you just stick to reading it. Typing doesn't work the same way, so sorry - gonna have to be a caveman and write.
  
  
• If you don't know an answer to an exam question, skip it for now. The teacher may have included information later on in the test that helps jog your memory. Remember, there's nothing wrong with partial credit, so just try to write something. Also, don't be like me and draw dinosaurs that look like your history teacher instead of answering questions. That shit got real.
  
  
• Study with a friend, and by "study" I don't mean "make out really hard on top of a textbook". Osmosis only works in chemistry class. Probably.

Because somehow my counterpart seems to think I'd be better at school shopping than him, I'm going to be in Honolulu this weekend for a day or two. If anyone wants to join Holly and I or take pity on me and lead the charge, please do. Regina, I'm looking at you.

EDIT: Friends and family - August and I are getting married in Honolulu on Saturday at noon. Wear whatever you want and no presents, but make sure you're there.

Hatter-Joneses: Can we use your place for the reception?

so many regrets I think I've come down with the flu. If anyone needs me, I'll be in bed.

Help. I got followed home.



If you've never seen a dinosaur and a dog cuddle, you're missing out.

Stuck as to what to do on Valentines Day? Lonely and sure you're going to die alone, your body eaten by wolves (you wish)? Single and ready to mingle, or at least tingle? Take the El Cheapo way out and come bowl with ~ME~ on Saturday. What's a better ode to the power of love than rental shoes, stubbed fingers and greasy pizza that's been sitting under a heat lamp since the Cretaceous period? NOTHING.

For those assorted couples who can keep their pookie eyes to themselves, come on by as well! If you violate the uncoupling code and get nauseating, in twenty years the bowling alley will be the site of an urban legend that culminates in the line "...and then they never found the lovers' heads...". This is intended to be a safe place for grouchiness and singleness and self-esteem crises, not an opportunity for you to host a speech about how you finally found ~the one~.

If I sound grumpy, it's because I am. I know I'm supposed to be cool and aloof and not care about Valentines Day, but I'm not, so. This is me being passive aggressive about it. Or is this aggressive? IDK IDK. COME BOWLING.

HPD, the gift basket of awesome coffee and chocolates are from me, don't let Parrish steal it all. But thank you guys for the appropriate "I'm from the future, here's my credentials" paperwork. And for not assuming I made everything up.... Since I only made up about 20%!

Now I have to work on my "trust me, I'm awesome" speech for DWB/MSF. I don't want to expend my dinosaur threats too early.

Family - you're all getting flu shots today.

I'm used to getting pulled back to Hawaii for food and family squabbles, but not literally getting pulled back in time. Must be a major Mad Hook fight.

[Future Neverland!BP Grace! Deets in her journal!]