July 2016




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Oct. 23rd, 2015


Me and Ivy are gettin married on Halloween! Danny you better be there! And any of Ivy's pals!

My Halloween costume is a bride. :D :D

[Filtered to John/Feathers]

You don't got to come if you'll be sad, but you're invited just fyi.

Sep. 11th, 2015


Right! So.. that little thing called prison? Much nicer here than back home, and I haven't yet been murdered for being an apostate or made Tranquil because I'm dangerous. They've even fed me! The bed has a cushy mat! Could be far worse.

But right still prison. Anyone able to, uh. Help with that? It was an honest misunderstanding, I swear.

Aug. 18th, 2015


Okay, can someone that isn't a bat spar with me? I need to punch things, not be criticized every five seconds while punching things.

Aug. 14th, 2015


okay are people shipping me with b-man because there's this and this and I'm like no. he never smiles people. never. SO DULL.

unrelated but hey red


Jun. 22nd, 2015


Vacation time! Or, well, we're calling it a research retreat, but let's be honest, two weeks in the most-remote, gorgeous, and unpopulated regions of Maui? Vacation!

You see, darlings, my fellow botanists and I are gravely concerned about the plight of the Haleakalā silversword. It's only found at very high elevations within the crater of the Haleakalā volcano, and I'm afraid that it's a very fragile, dear thing. It can only flower once, so its window for pollination is brief, and unfortunately excessive cattle grazing and an alien species of Argentine ant that feast on the silverswords' main source of insect pollinators are doing quite a number on the flower's overall population.

I'm terribly excited! Now then, as I will be gone for two weeks, I trust Ella to do a wonderful job in my absence. Don't do anything I wouldn't do, sweetheart!

[ Filtered to Harley ]

I've left detailed instructions on how to care for everything in my stead. The dahlias should be quite happy to be left to their own devices for a little while, but make sure you chatter away to the pitcher plants! They're going to miss their mummy. And remember, do not use the cacti for bludgeoning weapons! I don't care how prickly they grow!

The combination to the experimental greenhouse is 55403. Only open it if your life is in danger.

[ /Filter ]

[ Filtered to John Blake ]

Keep an eye on the clown, will you? She's likely to get bored, and that would be unpleasant for everyone, wouldn't it?

If you're a good boy, I'm bringing you back a present. And it's not even carnivorous!

[ /Filter ]

May. 21st, 2015


[ Filtered to John Blake ]

Sweet-pea, I've got a question for you if you could spare a moment for little ol' me.

[ Filtered to Harley ]

Have you seen the Jo Harley, darling, when you're awake, I've made you breakfast.

May. 6th, 2015


I'm suing! I don't even look like a clown! Also whose that guy I'm leaning on? I only got two friends, Red and Mr. J and he ain't either of them. And Kitty, sometimes, when she's being nice.

Apr. 23rd, 2015


Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

HIYA! It's so sunny here, not a Bat or Bird in sight! Everyone's smiling, and they're not even full of Jay juice, so how's about that. I told the mooks who dragged me outta the water that I'm an honest citizen now, but they said there's this magical doohicky, and I'm like, story of my life, y'know. A girl tries to get her act together but people always believe the bad rep. :(((( I tell ya it's enough to break my sweet little clown heart.

Oh well! I'm always a sunny side up type of gal anyway, so who wants to give me a tour? Pleeeeeease?

Mar. 24th, 2015


Finally. We were shielded from the worst of it here in Hawaii, but nevertheless you could feel the stillness of things as November turned to December and half the world leaned over for its annual nap. But Persephone's gone back to her mother's house, buds are forming on the vine, and the world is filled new, new new again.

Spring! My season. Who wants a kiss? I'm in such a good mood it won't even be that toxic. What's a little dizziness against the beauty of spring?

Jan. 26th, 2015


I'd like to give a warm welcome to the Lili`uokalani Botanical Garden's newest intern, Ms. Ella Booth! We're terribly excited to have her charm and expertise as we prepare our gardens for the upcoming spring.

Ella, I've got a few papers for you to sign and a few shots you'll need to take since you'll be hanging out more than most with me, and I want to make sure that I wouldn't be a single bit of danger to you.

Dec. 30th, 2014


To all the new arrivals - hello, sweeties. I'm Dr. Pamela Isley, and I work in research and botany for the botanical gardens out of Honolulu. If you happen to notice a blonde, irrepressibly cheerful clown in your midst, send her my way, will you, and keep heavy objects out of her hands?

I'm not one for New Year's resolutions - I go by the natural clock, not one dreamed up by some sixteenth century pope. It's hard to avoid the optimism that goes hand in hand with the holiday, though, so I thought I'd write down my hopes for 2015:
  • I wish Astrid would flower; I'd dearly like to see it.
  • I'd like my public interaction component of my job back, even if the vast majority of the public are simpering morons without the slightest bit of common sense or decency.
  • A bigger greenhouse for my apartment would be a good project.
  • My above-mentioned clown friend.
  • Greater production and customer retention for the green industry.

Oct. 10th, 2014


Poor little me just got put on lab duty for the next few weeks, so I'm afraid my stint with the public at the Botanical Gardens is on indefinite hold. I'm just no good at discussing climate change with skeptics! I get so terribly flustered when they deny scientific fact, and then inevitably they begin to counter my perfectly legitimate concern with 2014's answer to manifest destiny and the next thing I know, the potted plant our admin keeps on her desk has sprouted fangs and vines and is attempting to have an early dinner.

Oopsie. Does anyone know how long this state lasts? I'm so flustered, and terribly vulnerable...

Sep. 11th, 2014


Hello again. I know you'll hear about this event on the radio and in the papers, but I thought I'd extend my personal invitation to my favorite portal refugees. The Koko Crater Botanical Garden and I are working together to produce a Friday evening program: Dine and Vine. Come enjoy one of the hottest - and driest - areas of Oahu and feast on a collection of small-plates from local (and organic) restaurants. A small selection of wines from local wineries will also be available for purchase, but do make sure you're of legal age, won't you? I'm terrible at remembering details like that, but thankfully they have me doing a lecture rather than serving the food which is just as well, given how breakable most of you are.

I would be delighted if you could come. $15 at the gate gets you six small-plates and a non-alcoholic beverage, and free attendance to any of the lectures. Mine is this Friday: "Explosive Chemistry: Volcanic Soils and Their Effect on Agriculture".

I look forward to seeing your beautiful faces.

Jul. 24th, 2014


Oahu. I'd recognize the yellow ilima anywhere.

If this is a prank, you won't be laughing for long.

Jul. 23rd, 2014


happy batman day! )

Nov. 12th, 2013


I did acid once. It was kind of like this. Only, more floating llamas, less cops telling me I'm fictional and usually have breasts.

Not that I'm against breasts. Or a well-fitting catsuit. I just tend to prefer them under me, not on me.

Anyway, Sebastian Kyle. Hello, nice to meet you, where's the exit, etc.

Sep. 26th, 2013


I do not need two hulking masses stalking me.

Aug. 22nd, 2013


Well, that's disappointing.

Aug. 11th, 2013


...And once again, I'm reminded why it's never a good idea to agree to "One more drink, darling."

May. 18th, 2013


You've been quiet.

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