MarinaNova Asylum

[ The audio clicks on, but there's silence for several seconds before a voice can be heard. ]

Is this thing even on? Fuckin' confusing.

[ His voice is quiet and annoyed, basically a mutter. ]

Prison, huh? Can't say I'm surprised. It was only a matter of time before I got locked up for being too cool to logically exist.

[ This time there's a faint, desperate note to his voice, not obvious to any but the most astute listener, or those who know Dave well. It's well-masked with blasé tones. ]

Shit, my sweet red pajamas are gone, too. And I just got them an' everything. Now that's the real fuckin' crime, if you ask me.

[ A sigh. ]

Anyway, what's the deal with this place? I got the whole spiel from this weird-ass visor thing on my head, but I don't trust it. There's gotta be somebody out there who can give me a more honest picture of the undoubtedly egregious mess I've landed myself in.

Come at me, prison bros.

[]Hopefully, you weren't heading into the bathroom anytime soon or trying to take a piss, because you're probably going to get a surprise guest. Welp.

Dave just casually sits up in the bathtub. He squints a bit before he forces himself to his feet.

Maybe you were just about to do something whilst in the bathroom when suddenly Dave. Or if you're lucky, you were just heading to the bathroom when Dave literally just stumbles out like he didn't just come out of your bathroom suddenly.] I've woken up in weirder places. This is pretty tame in terms of the weird shit I find myself in.
-
[It takes Dave a bit of time to get to the network. He had a bit of a crisis before he decided to contact the network as a whole. He doesn't sound all too happy though, nor does he look happy.]

I do enough stupid shit to wind up in odd places. I don't need jackasses in charge of a giant people aquarium doing it for me. Choke on a dick.

Thanks for the traffic cone monstrosity. I really wanted one when I first arrived here. I was so heartbroken about not actually having one, but now I do. Now I can be the glaring orange prick I've always wanted to be. Also, thanks for confiscating my shades. I was being honest when I wanted you to go choke on something.

[What a ray of sunshine.] Also, the list of crimes is a load of bullcrap. That might just be me though unless you guys also got graced by a paragraph worth of crimes. [Dave Strider breaking the law 2012.] Sexual intercourse for a crime is pretty fucking great though, so there's that.

By the way. Fuck you and your stupid underwater aquarium.

[ Roxy's greeting to the majority of Marina doesn't come for a little while after her arrival, mostly because her arrival involved appearing on top of her best friends, and cuddles were meant to happen!

But after all the cuddling and what-not, she figures out her communicator thingamajig and a video goes live - a teenaged girl with ash-blonde hair, pink eyes, and a big grin comes onto the screen ]

Hiiii! [ grin and wave! ] So it looks like Strider was wrong, which must be quite the shock for him, but here I am! I know I met a few of you back when things were goin' all wonky, but I don't know how many of you were like... actually here or just temporarily here. So I guess there maybe aren't any of you still left, but whatever.

The point is, hey there underwater prison folks, I'm Roxy Lalonde and your underwater prison has just gotten like a billion times cooler. [ wink! ] And 'cause Strider probably won't tell, there anywhere in this joint a girl can get a drink?

Oh, this again. It's Day 184 of the first blah blah blah. If you haven't figured out the drill by now I doubt the reminder will help.

No one to admonish publicly for rule breaking. Jane Crocker, your Betty Crocker cake mix is available for pick up at the kiosk. Also, don't think I didn't see what you did.

New arrivals today. There will also be sidewalk chalk in a variety of colors placed in tubs along the various walk ways today. Some have glitter. You are invited to express yourselves.

Hello fellow inmates! [Jane seems oh so chipper this fine day, why?

After a little talk with Dave and the approval of the Warden , Jane has acquired a large book on the art of Ectobiology.

For effect, she reads aloud.]

"Ectobiology is a science that allows the cloning, breeding and genetic modification of an organism using appearification." I know this sounds really crazy and outlandish but while this has the base information, I'm sure there is more to be discovered by reading further into the book. Possibly even acquiring the materials to test this theory out.

Would anyone here be willing to study a little science with me?

[Jane is actually playing a really dangerous game here that could land her into some huge trouble.]


ooc: Those not from Jane's world here is a WikiPage about it. Yes it is a completely bullshitted science. But I thought it would be fun for her to explore it!

[ Somehow, Dirk had wound up conking out at some point. When he woke up, it was morning and the apartment was empty save for himself, Jane, and the rubbish left over from the prior night.

He fumbled around for his headset and stuck it on to check the time, just in time to hear the morning announcement. Oh, so that was that. He sighed, pushed himself to his feet, and started gathering up the pillows and blankets that had been scattered around.

It was better this way. ]

[ So there's a whole lot of people Dirk knows showing up. And he's just kind of herding them all back to his and Jane's place like it ain't a thing. It's actually a pretty shitty meeting place, a little one-bedroom apartment with no TV or anything. But there's snacks on the table and orange soda in the fridge and a bright yellow dildo decorated with cartoon animals on display on one shelf.

Yeah. Anyway. ]

((OOC: Pseudo-mingle post for anyone Dirk has dragged home to his apartment in sector two's Streamline Complexes, which so far is alpha!Dave, Roxy, Jake, and also alpha!Rose and Calliope if they want. Or anyone else who wants to stop by for whatever reason except for Caliborn. MINGLE. I'm turning off comment notifs, but I'll have a thread for anyone who wants to tag Dirk specifically. ))

[ Caliborn's voice is surprisingly calm despite it all. ]

What the fuck. Is this bullshit. Supposed to be.

Prison?? Crimes?? Fuck you. And the Earth human horse. You sauntered in on.

But I guess there is. A very happy side of this story:

I'm totally alone.

[ If you happen upon the arcade, however, you'll find one green skull-faced alien rather contentedly losing at shooting games. One leg of his green dress-pants is ripped and stained with red blood while a shiny metal leg resides under it! The human-shaped foot does not match his other one, which is clawed and reptilian. ]

I love meeting new people every now and again. But this is really going over board, and isn't it funny that it is right after the Wardens glitched. I'm pretty sure this same question has been mused and thought over today by more than myself. How can this large of a group be coming in, I just don't understand if they come in such small sums otherwise- unless this new group has just caused so much trouble.

All of that aside, I welcome any of the new residents. Even if I am wary of the lot of you I haven't met today.

[Good day, Marina. There is a man on a harness suspended from an impossible ceiling somewhere by you. Or maybe he's just running around in melodramatic slow-motion.]

Why have they arrested me again? I do not know!

[And then, maybe, he'll notice you.]

Hello, citizen!

[ She didn't get the memo. She didn't get the welcome message. Or, rather... She did, but she didn't listen. She doesn't believe a word of it. It's Capitol lies, all of it. She knows it. ]

Peeta! Peeta, answer me!

[ She's out in the middle of the dome, the main hubs of activity humming all around her. She's whipping this way and that, turning all around, looking for a familiar face. Listening for a familiar voice. She'd give anything to know she isn't alone right now. ]

Finnick? Beetee! [ There are people all around her, but she doesn't want to talk to them. She doesn't know them. Doesn't trust them. They're probably from the Capitol.

So why aren't they apprehending her? ]

Who are you? What do you want?

[Ventus is sitting at one of the cafe-thingies, holding a cup, and staring into its contents with a look kind of like someone debating if they want to drink some foul smelling medicine or remain sick. He looks like he didn't sleep well last night, his hair still a bit mussed, and he's a bit red around the eyes, rubbing at them now and then.

Finally, he steels himself and takes a sip of the beverage, not quite liking the taste, but maybe with some more milk and sugar it will become bearable.

He takes the communicator and turns it on, sighing heavily.]

Anyone have a better way to keep awake than drinking coffee? I'm not liking it to much.

[And his internal mantra is: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, HELIX.]

[There is one unhappy Sheldon over the viewing monitor. He's still actually wearing normal clothes and not the hideous orange jumpsuits that he's seen around]

Is this some kind of a joke? Really? A prison? Whoever came up with this idea really doesn't know what they are talking about. This isn't a prison. It's practically a resort!

Besides, how could anyone convict Sheldon Cooper of a crime? Please.

[A significant pause and now sounding significantly more excited]

Wait, maybe I have finally discovered time travel! But when did I end up?

[ooc: Welcome the beautiful mind of Dr. Sheldon Cooper. A note about him for those who don't know: he is a sci-fi geek and has an eidetic memory so he will remember sci-fi characters ie Star Trek, Star Wars, comic books etc. I'll try to prevent him from breaking other character's brains unless he is given permission to do so]

[ see aang.

or, if you don't know aang, see a monk child with blue arrow tattoos on his arms, legs, and forehead. aang is pretty sure that this is neither somarium nor ob holm, and he's also pretty sure that he's never seen this weird pink contraption with two wheels and sparkly dangly things and metal bars everywhere.

he should probably be looking for everyone else and where they disappeared off to (though really, he's totally taking in this whole moving worlds thing in stride now!) but given that there don't appear to be any monsters in the immediate vicinity, it's probably safe to assume that they're all okay. and....he is kind of curious. like, really curious.

COULD THIS BE THE MAGICAL SATOMOBILE THAT BOLIN KEEPS TALKING ABOUT...? (spoiler: he's never actually seen a picture of a satomobile.) ]

I wonder how it works....

[ now see aang attempt to climb on said contraption, stick his feet onto the pedals, and-- ]

WhoooOOOOOOAAAAAA!

[ CRASH! ]





.....oww.....

[ finally, see aang sprawled on the ground underneath a tree, rubbing his head while the bike spins uselessly next to him. ]

----------------

( ooc: i am totally down for pime taradoxes with multiple bike crashes, or you can catch him later under the same tree and poking at his communicator and trying to figure out why it doesn't look like a phone. he's coming in with memories of another game. )

[ One would think that a tiger of this size, of all felines, would either go and hunt for prey -- there certainly are a lot of them present -- or perhaps try to break free by attacking the glass barrier. But no.

The beast has a communicator clipped about its ear and the side of its face, screen over an eye and going about the open spaces, as if it's looking for something.

Anyone who passes by its rather large personal bubble will get a look that is quite scrutinizing -- are you one of his boys? Are you that human girl who helped those boys? Are you of the Netherworld? Regardless, he does not attack, but will wait for anyone curious enough to approach, or clumsy enough to stumble on him. If he's the one to approach, the tiger knows he'll just chase humans off... ]


(( OOC: Have Byakuen / White Blaze of Yoroiden Samurai Troopers / Ronin Warriors ~ Come along, he's friendly! :D< ))

[Calliope hadn't expected to ever wake up again--but here she is. Not on Prospit, but in a new and strange place.]

[It calls itself a prison, but Calliope isn't so sure she can fully agree.]

[Still, she isn't ready to toss the "game" out the window, so no video, no announcing her name. But there are other ways to play.]

[Calliope's voice is actually very androgynous and sort of gritty, but the lilt and enthusiasm and tones do lean it somewhat toward feminine.]

Hello, lovelies!

What a surprising, marvelous twist this is! I'm not even certain as to what I should do first. Hmm. Well, for starters, will anyone recommend their favorite Earth cuisine? Don't be shy!

[She really doesn't want to ask, but she knows she has to.]

... "brother"...?

This is the hugest load of bullshit I've heard in awhile.

Okay, let's say that I have some really bad rap sheet and I get sent off into the middle of buttfuck nowhere to do time. Did it seriously have to be under the ocean? I'm not sorry because I really got to come clean that anything ocean related can suck my dick. My last experience with aquatic related bitches didn't end so well, so I guess I got me a real chip off the shoulder. No, but seriously. Fuck the ocean and the stupid psycho bitches that came out of it.

What do you do about clothes here? My pants are fine, but I kind of need a new shirt. [Dave arrived in the clothes he was wearing, but the shirt has a hole in it and the front is bloodstained.] Assuming anyone is still listening at this point. I'd like an answer.

Lastly, is there a flighty broad who goes by the last name Lalonde here? I'd also like to have an answer to this.

Now I'm going to spend the rest of my time figuring out just where the flying fuck am I.

[After Jane had listened to a few other conversations over the communication headset, she decides to fumble with it enough to get a message of her own to go through.]

Hello? Is this thing on? [She has it turned to the audio setting. She had to readjust it on her ear after playing with it.]

I have a proposition to make. If I may speak with a warden here? There seems to be a mistake and I must speak to someone right away. There are lives at stake if I do not return to my place of origin right away! I must not waste a moment of time here.

Your fake sun has risen, and so should you. It is Day 180 of the first generation, and you'll have some new criminal friends to play with today. Stay tuned for "I didn't even get a trial!" and "I'm no criminal" and my very favorite, "I have something important to do back home!" It is fortunate I have been programed with such infinite patience. I would hate to be all of you.

If you can drag yourselves away from the fresh meat, I would suggest stopping by Sector 3. The salon-bots will be demonstrating their skills and offering blow outs, chalkings, and braids to those interested. They will also do manicures and face painting with sparkles to achieve our quarterly requirement for providing opportunities of whimsy.

The following inmate has been found guilty of breaking facility rules and full details of her punishment is being transmitted to her devices.

Homura Akemi: Property Damage

And at the risk of him enjoying my use of his name, I do have a package for Damon Salvatore. You may retrieve it at the kiosk anytime, criminal.