DISORDER JOURNALS

[ ORDER ]

Is everyone okay?

I have Umbridge. I almost let her She's very badly hurt beca but I have her.

[ ROBIN, FRANCINE, & FERGUS ]

Something I need to t I was involved in the thing today but I'm okay. Just a broken rib.

Well, after a year of living on Knockturn Alley it's finally happened. I was pickpocketed earlier today by a boy who needed help finding a lost puppy that probably didn't exist. I'm trying not to be too upset with myself -- it was bound to happen sooner or later.

Also, someone told me I seemed like I would "really love" the movie The Shape of Water but I looked it up and I'm a little confused.

[ ORDER ]

Hi. My friend Richenza Selwyn died today at the match and Graham Montague said it wasn't the Death Eaters. And now the Prophet is saying she died fighting off vigilantes. I was just wondering if anyone saw her or knows what happened to her. Thank you.

[ ORDER ]

Hello! I thought I should properly introduce myself to everyone.

My name is Rolf Scamander! You’ve probably heard of my grandfather — he literally wrote the book on magical creatures, haha! I work at the Silvanus Kettleburn Nature Reserve and have access to a lot of creatures who may be helpful in the fight against Death Eaters. I also can obtain (through means that may not always be legal) other creatures we can use. For example, I sent a box of ashwinders to someone’s home and then their home burned down! Ashwinders only live for an hour so you don’t have to worry about them being harmed by the Death Eater.


Also, we can send Death Eaters to the Isle of Drear! It’s very dangerous!

I have other skills (dueling, limited sleight of hand, crossfit) as well, but I thought it best to address the whole magical creatures thing. I think that’s it? I’m very happy to be here!

Today, at the Silvanus Kettleburn Nature Reserve, someone brought in a cursed duvet they thought was a Lethifold.

[ FRANCINE, FERGUS, ROBIN ]

What if someone (not me) liberated Rodolphus Lestrange's horses?

[ DEDALUS DIGGLE ]

Are you okay??? I saw hoot saying you'd DIED but then the Order said you were okay!

What sort of Death Eater goes around calling people nerds? Beyond that, what sort of Death Eater has the time to hack a blog?

[ FRIENDS ]

Hello! Don't be alarmed, but there were two werewolves in my flat when I came home last night. I'm fine! They were upset I disrespected Fenrir Greyback and said I wasn't afraid of him. Thalia did a number on one of them, but they called her a raccoon! She's so obviously a jarvey! CoMC should be a required class.

[ ROBIN ]

Would you be willing to help me redo my wards? I can pay.

The Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures is not without its flaws, but handing it over to Fenrir Greyback is disgusting. Non-humans absolutely deserve representation in the DRCMC, but Greyback is a murderer who likes to turn young children. The current administration has made it clear it cares very little about the well-being of humans and non-humans alike.

[ ANGELINA ]

Hi.

[ FRANCINE & ROBIN ]

Guess what!

The wandless are
I think the Death E

Next week is Rare Creatures Week at the Silvanus Kettleburn Nature Reserve. If you're interested in learning more about unique and unusual magical creatures, there will be guided tours highlighting some of the more uncommon creatures in the UK. But I'd like to talk about one you won't find on any reserve: The Quintaped, rated XXXXX by the Ministry of Magic.

The Quintaped is exclusive to the Isle of Drear for a very good reason. According to legend, there used to be two different families on the Isle of Drear: the MacBoon clan and the McClivert clan. There was a lot of bad blood between these two families, which resulted in a duel between the family patriarchs. After the McClivert patriarch was killed, the McCliverts transfigured the MacBoons into deadly and monstrous five-legged beasts. They were resistant to all attempts to untransfigure them, and the monsters eventually devoured the entire McClivert family.

The Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures attempted to untransfigure them as well to no avail. Which is unfortunate, because the Quintaped is carnivorous and especially loves the taste of human flesh. The Isle of Drear is so dangerous that the Ministry of Magic made it unplottable a few couple hundred years ago.

If you're interested in learning about more unusual (and slightly less deadly) creatures, stop by the Silvanus Kettleburn Nature Reserve next week! :-)

I'm normally not much of a Celestina fan (sorry!) but the new song is really good! But I've also heard that it's really calming to spirits? So anyone with a bit of a poltergeist problem should probably look into it!

The Faris Spavin Animal Shelter is hosting an emergency adoption drive this Sunday morning. The influx of Wandless in Diagon Alley has unfortunately resulted in an influx of animals that need to be rehomed. There will be cats, dogs, kneazles, crups, owls, toads, even a few more eccentric animals -- I'd adopt them all myself if I could! There won't be any adoption fees at all, so this is a great opportunity to expand your family. :-) If you can't adopt a pet right now, you should stop by anyway!

Thank you! I hope everyone has a pleasant day.