DISORDER JOURNALS

QUIDDITCH

i think it's time we had a little scrimmage. i'm feeling rusty and that's not going to fly

FRIENDS OF ANGELINA AND FRED AND ANGELINA AND FRED

so idk if you're all aware that jokes about angelina and fred being married are one step closer to being true but i think we need to celebrate this momentous occasion! preferably with a very ott party of some sort

JESS

i have to tell you something

quiz time, everybody!

( which order member are you? )

maybe we should start putting bounties on the death eaters' heads instead of innocent peoples'

ORDER

i know there's a lot of stuff right now but we said we were going to keep an eye on eddie after everything with lestrange so here goes.

eddie told me rabastan wants him to try to get info about the order from me. i'm obviously not going to give him any and eddie doesn't want me to give him any. we're going to handle that part, maybe stage a fight the next time lestrange brings it up to him, but i thought you should all know to be careful not to answer any of his questions about the order if he asks them just in case lestrange is putting him up to it.

but what i'm more worried about is that eddie told me lestrange was willing to go as far as hurting him to make it seem like he needs our help. eddie said he was talking about breaking his bones. and i don't really know what to do about that. i don't think eddie does either. i don't really think he should have to but all of this is insane.

G16/17

sooooo how are we celebrating april fool's day this year?

RHYS & NORA

i'm sorry i haven't reached out to either of you yet. it's been a busy few days making sure everyone's been safe on our end. how are you both?

EDDIE

hey

ORDER

rhys and nora just dmed me to say rodolphus lestrange attacked them and destroyed the gentle green. they've been hiding my parents at the inn. they sent me a picture if any of you want to make sure it's them. there's five other people with them who i don't know but i'm guessing they were living there or something.

they don't have anywhere to go right now. is there a safehouse or anywhere safe we can let them stay?

JESS

mum and dad are definitely alive. i think i might be about to see them with my own eyes.

today's the first day of spring and the easter bunny came early this year



he plays dress up as a hitwizard almost as well as this

ORDER DMLE

sooooo what's the deal with ar dawlish?

LEON

oh hello, you

ORDER

so! i talked with the quidditch players and a few of them are interested in joining. oliver, grace and will really want to help. i think they'd be great and with some training, i think they'd have a lot to bring to the table. roger and keaton weren't as sure about joining, but they still want to help the death eaters' victims if they can.

i've also got the coordinates of some of the purists. no death eaters from the looks of it, but definitely enough to make a point. becca's been a champion. she's got caroline's rune in place and she's pretty sure no one suspects a thing.

i ALSO [...] talked to layla. she said she wants to give us a heads up about what the death eaters are doing if she gets any advance notice. she told me that yaxley asked the death eaters for suggestions about how to rein the aurors in after he saw that hooter. i don't know what he's planning on doing or if she's even telling the truth or if we can trust her at all but she said she let my pa owen, you should maybe be extra careful.

JESS

i have to tell you something. about mum and dad.

in today's edition of dances with wrongly maligned and unemployed vigilantes, dogs

QUIDDITCH

so now that my secret's been out to all of you for a while, i want to float something by you. you've all done really amazing work to help the muggleborns and your hearts are all in the right places. i know most of us are out of a job now (except maybe roger, i bet your second career is exploding) and looking for ways to help out. i also know that re professor lupin's talked to some of you already about helping the wandless.

so i guess what i'm trying to say is, what do you think about working with the order of the phoenix? like...officially?

HESTIA

hey

ORDER

so how'd we do tonight? did anyone see the explosions? kinda wished we'd just planted them ON the death eaters but it was still pretty cool. hugo nott's face was completely worth it.

fred's pretty banged up and i think i've got a dislocated shoulder so if anyone feels like setting some broken bones and putting my shoulder back in its socket, we could use a hand or i can probably get us to leon's if he's not busy.

let's clear a few things up:

• no one ever followed harry potter around with wide eyes, except maybe draco malfoy, who has clearly always been o b s e s s e d with him. and maybe luna lovegood but that's just how her eyes look
  
• the rules we broke in school were stupid rules. dolores umbridge is nothing but a woman-sized troll
  
• not that it matters, but i wasn't hiding my parents or anyone else. when i said i didn't know where they were, i meant it
  
• henry o'leary can eat my ass
  
• i never wanted the reason for my being promoted to be something like taking a muggleborn's place. i planned to give it back when we put an end to the mrc
  
• anyone who wants to put my terrible temper to the test, go for it. but think carefully before you do, because i'm violent and tempestuous and i will end you

GWEN

i'm upset but ang told me what happened and i get it.

whichever one of you delusional losers went around hanging up nott posters today, you're wasting your time. tinworth is never going to elect that idiot, no matter how many temper tantrums you throw here.

ORDER

so ang and i ran into a death eater in our building putting up nott posters. we're both fine, we're not hurt and we put out the fire but the one of our neighbors is trapped in his flat. there's runes on his door. can someone plz come help?

FEMALE FRIENDS

ummmm so i know everything is awful and going to complete shit right now but eddie won a spa day at that knockturn party and he asked me to go with him and i'm not completely imagining that he's into me, right? cause i'm like 99.5% sure i'm in. like i'm gonna get it this week. it being the thing. you know. taking it to pound town. emerging from my seaweed wrap a whole new woman. calvin harris' impending 2 become 1 remix. you get it.

and please say hello to the newest member of mine and ang's family. her name is eupraxia wilhelmina anastasia chelys, esquire; hellion and she's a badass party turtle for hire. 🐢

also, was anyone else's wireless acting weird yesterday? mine kept whistling and tbh i was starting to think i'd gone mad but it's been quiet today, so maybe not.

and thanks for the bday wishes, everyone!

ROGER

hey, i missed you last night. i hope you're feeling better 💙

ORDER

the death eaters attacked tinworth last night. they [...] murdered several of mine and ang's neighbors and left them in front of ar. robards' house. he thinks it's because he announced that he's running for wizengamot and i'm sure he's right. maybe we should do more patrols in tinworth. the crazy shit never stops happening here.

also george and i are going to check out another plant tonight in mould-on-the-would. my brother told me there have been a few people brought in with burns from there who said it's been breathing fire. given how the last couple of these things have gone, can anyone be on standby in case a bunch of death eaters show up?

horoscopes from the onion. more like horrorscopes, am i right?

sagittarius
you should avoid making any financial decisions next week, as the pain you’ll be in from all the third-degree flash burns will probably affect your judgment.

guess it's good it's my bday week and i can let everyone else make the financial decisions for me! but maybe i'll stay away from the candles on the cake this time.

ROLF

heyyyy

MONTAGUE

i have something to say to you

i found the newest rich person prestige trend, just in time for the holidays! tiffany's calls it everyday objects, i call it nonperishable chic.



i bet the malfoys are going to get draco some of these so their precious baby angel can stack them like blocks 👼🏻 tres cute~ when he's not playing with them, they can make a pyramid and use them as a home decor sick reminder of all the wandless they've doomed to starve in diagon alley.

ps #eattherich

pps instead of buying this actual garbage come donate to charity next saturday instead ✌🏾

so did the pitch do their halloween edition early or something?

MAGPIES

i didn't just imagine wadcock was there, right? it was actually him? i mean kind of

ORDER

i guess the death eaters are going to use inferi against us now.
if living out the plot of a zombie film is your thing, i guess it's your lucky day.

soooo despite opinions to the contrary it ACTUALLY turns out angelina has the ~gift of prediction~ (i don't know if that's a thing, i just made it up) and everyone should bow down.

um so on a related note basically you're looking at another the magpies' new starting chaser. it's coming a few too many years early and at a huge cost to our team, but i'm honored to accept the position. i've got some really big shoes to fill and i hope i can be even half as great as my predecessor. when this is all over, he'll get his rightful spot back because he earned it and i'm going to do the same. in the meantime, i plan to kick some ass on his behalf.

killing people for saying you're wrong doesn't suddenly make you right. rip johnson wadcock, cannon, wizard, martyr.

DREW

can i stay at yours tonight?

LEE

i need someone to tell me if i'm being an idiot. [...] well like i actually need someone to tell me i'm not being an idiot but if i'm being an idiot i need you to tell me.

BAZ

this isn't what i meant when i said it wasn't the cannons' year. i mean obviously. i mean are you okay?

someone tell me a joke. like a really good one, like a tears running down my cheeks clutching my stomach COULD pee my pants but i won't joke.

i'll also take memes. i guess. BUT ONLY FUNNY ONES. like ykw self-fellating or snatchers spontaneously combusting funny.

DREW

what are we going to do about dad?