DISORDER JOURNALS

Did anyone see the lightning last night? It was just amazing to watch.

FRIENDS.

Hey. How is everyone? What are you doing with your Sunday? (If it’s Sunday dinner, I want in, my family are all kinds of busy today. No, I don’t feel shame in asking.) It’s super weird adjusting to being back home and not being around people all the time.

ABERFORTH.

Hello old man. You’ve been quiet. Are you okay?

Becca can you see this?? Are you out?? Are you safe??

GRACE.

Hey. You okay? Are there any updates on Lee?

ANGELINA, GEORGE, PERCY, OLIVER.

Hey. Any updates? Can I bring anything?

FRIENDS incl. ORDER.

Hey, does anyone want some good news? I have some good news. That post isn't a fake and Joseph Bell is back awake and around and about. I don't think we should go spreading where he is but he's going to get round to everyone and talk to them and — actually if anyone knows a good way to fill him in on the last few weeks other than where he's asking on the network that'd be a good call too.

♥ to everyone who sent him well-wishes. You're all the greatest.

ORDER

Hey. Been chatting with our Death Eater hostage today about some of those bigger picture things, since IDK what'd happen around names and stuff. Anyway. Please take the following with a smallish pinch of salt:

To confirm everyone's suspicions, it looks like the Imperius that Thicknesse is under is def. Manbun Yaxley's. At least it was at the start, and given they're around each other a lot at the Ministry I'd say it's a safe bet it still is.

And the other most interesting bit I got out of her was that YKW and the high ups seem to be convening at Malfoy Manor for whenever they have to do meetings. Also that it's warded to high heaven so any kind of attack on it would have to be super carefully planned, but not enough details on what the warding entails.

I hope it's something. Sorry it's not more. I'll keep trying.

ORDER.

I know this has been discussed in bits and various places and with various people but — to put everything on the table in one go in as rational a way as I can:

Layla Fairbourne wishes to surrender to the Order and leave the Death Eaters. This will be happening by the 10th April, allowing her a brief amount of time to get her affairs in order.

The proposal I would like to give as it stands is: she will be apprehended at a time of our choosing and without her knowledge, surrender her wand and remain under arrest at a secure location (tbd), impart any information she or the Order deems important to Order members without resistance. This way we don't have the added uncertainty and problems that could arise from an active spy situation, or if this offer to surrender turns into another an act of betrayal.

If anyone could suggest or give guidance on such a location and warding a place to be entirely secure, that would be welcomed. Because of the nature of this situation and the possibility that it could be a trap, I want this to be done right and would need help if anyone can offer it?

In the event of the overall defeat of YKW she will be required to stand trial.

This is a way to get one less Death Eater on their side, some useful information and could be of further use down the line. It is worth noting that prior to this surrender that she has knowingly given up information relating to Death Eater crimes, has staged a situation relating to Hw J. Bell with his knowledge and participation in order to avoid further crimes, has attempted to warn known Order members about Death Eater movements (notably during the raid on the MRC) and has handed over the @deatheaters Hooter account.

Well. I guess that’s what I have to propose.

I appreciate Hooter’s new Death Eater a Day calendar but that last one was weak. Tell us something we didn’t already find out yesterday!

I’m also seriously debating a bingo card style betting pool for who’s named next, if anyone’s interested about joining in.

LEON.

Hey Leon. I’ve had some people ask about Joe and obvs I don’t want to ruin what you’ve got set up so should I just keep everything as vague as possible? Please lmk. And thank you again for doing this for us.

PERCY, OLIVER.

Alright, I need your help writing this thing or I’ll forget one of the points for discussion.

Hey, DMLE. I’m just going to address you as a whole but really. You know who I’m talking to.

My brother is innocent. I’ll swear it on anything you like, I’d swallow a gallon of veritaserum if I trusted any of you enough to only ask me that question. He’s a good wizard, a hard worker and is good at his job. He loves the rules so much that he properly reads those little booklets you get in board games rather than the first sentence and bullshitting your way through Cluedo for an hour or so then realising you did it wrong like everyone else does. He’s the best big brother in the world and he always looks out for me. He’s put up with so much shit because of what I say on here, and he’s done nothing wrong.

You’ve all just assumed that he’s breaking the law without thinking of how much he cares about the law. And he’s been HURT and I don’t care what you believe but your job is to protect people in need and uphold the law. That’s what Joe was doing when he got caught up in that fight. He was protecting people. He wasn’t there to cause trouble and you know he’s tried to stop the Order many times before.

Anyway.

I don’t care what you have to say in response to this. Don’t say anything. Do something. Help him. Help others. They’ve done nothing wrong and it’s supposed to be your job.

At least he’s safe from you all now.

Holyyyy shit I just got the funniest letter. Graham Montague wants to interview me!! And I’m not even famous yet!!
😂😂😂

BELLS.

Can he do that??????

Me today.

Angelina, Alicia, Lee.

I know the past few weeks have been trying, and I want to do something nice for Fred and George... anyone else want to help me?

George.

I have a page full of bad jokes about ears just for you.

Hey, Death Eaters. Since you’ve hurt my friend and my mother this week, is it easier if we just shut up? Because I sure as fuck won’t sooooo good luck. You can spook us all you like. Go for it. Waste all your energy on being assholes, it’s probably the only thing you can do. Or better still just shut up and leave us alone.

🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼

Sooooo journal wards are mostly working, right?

OLIVER + PERCY

Hey, um, not totally sure how to say this but — Layla said I could speak to you two. I met up with her the other day and talked about things and she said I could talk to you two so um — you've been talking to her too apparently. actually, could we just check it's only you two seeing this first??

I know Tinworth likes to have the monopoly on horrors but today I found out that in Norway there's a town called Hell. Imagine being born there. Imagine your mother saying "Go to Hell" just because she wants you to go into town and pick up some eggs.

Does anyone else know any funny place names? Asking for a bored friend.

"Purist Bullsh*t: I'm Not A Death Eater But I Definitely Believe In Their Elitist Crap is a captivating read with more -- and more obvious! -- nonsense than Lowe's last waste of paper and ink. You'll find yourself rolling your eyes ceaselessly if you're anything like me, dear reader. A book only suitable for reading at a Death Eater & Pals Ball and not for any rational reasonable thinker, Purist Bullsh*t will be around forever until we as a society start professing this obsession with magical blood is as dumb as it is offensive." -- Katie Bell.

:)

I know our national newspaper is in the business of selling lies nowadays, but it’s a bit rich of them to call Alicia a notable liar when she’s one of the best and most honest people I know.

Or maybe the definition of “liar” has changed??? Is it Opposite Day???

I know yesterday was supposedly the most depressing day of the year but idk I’m feeling it today. Everyone else I see looks tired too so it can’t be just me.

ALICIA.

Any news? 💕

Good to see that the appetite for Christmas shopping hasn't completely gone! Don't forget you'll get my A+ customer service if you go WWW for your present buying needs!

WARDED TO FORMER DA MEMBERS

Hey, I guess you've all seen the -- well, the shit that's going down at Hogwarts according to multiple sources. And there's still some left there from when we had the DA, and I know they're all spending time together. Anyway, so if anyone wants to meet up with them over their school holiday I think we should and just hear them out and see what we can do to help. Even if it's just lifting their spirits a bit while they're away from the castle, but I'm sure if we all put our heads together we can do more.

Fred, George - I think you volunteered the shop as a meeting place? Any ideas as to when we should try fit it in? Some evening sometime?

Give me a shout if you're interested and I'll keep you in the loop!

If anyone likes 90’s dance hits, come to Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes today because every time someone calls me (WORST day for this nonsense, I already yelled STOP at my dad down the phone) we’re getting treated to the same one. Again and again.

Related: does anyone know how to fix this?

Announcement time!

The press release is going out today but Mum wanted me to draw attention to it here. After twelve years as manager of Wigtown Wanderers, and eighteen with the team in total, Jacqueline Bell (aka Mum) is stepping down at the end of the year to focus on her family, writing her memoir and her charity work. We'll be holding a party at the end of the year to celebrate her career and doubtless she'll be doing some other kinds of commemorations with the league. Joey, Dad and I are ridiculously proud of her and all she's achieved during her time at Wigtown and we all look forward to sharing a few drinks and telling stories about her playing and managing days at the party.

In other, very important news, two of your favourite former Gryffindors have birthdays in the next week. Personally I'll accept flowers, gifts and assorted tributes and insist that you all shower Alicia with love, gifts and adoration too. Also we should all go get drunk sometime.

Hey, can I get #PHOENIXFACTCHECK for more things? I mean, how useful would it be to have that for everyday life? To tell your parents that whenever they said "if you keep making that face it'll freeze that way" when you were a kid? a handy everyday myth-dispeller?

In all seriousness, I think it's a good thing to keep an eye on even if you can't believe everything you read online.

LAYLA.

Hey, can I pick your brain a second?

It's a bloody JOKE SHOP WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

I've got a bit of a headache coming on so I'm crowd-sourcing ideas. If you had a friend, who was a gorgeous brilliant Quidditch-playing badass, and it was her birthday soon... what would you get her? Asking for a friend. Obvs. Not me.

Is this stupid week over yet?

FRED & GEORGE

I thought I'd come by early today and there's -- something. At the door.

The best part about being a (newly) gainfully employed person is -- no, not my great employers who def. did not ask me to write that -- but being able to go to Quidditch on a day off without a guilty conscience and the should-I-be-doing-something-productive feelings. Super excited to see my favourite ex-teammates on the pitch today 😊 If anyone needs me I'll be cheering them on.

Also it's just nice to feel like you've got a routine going the other days of the week.

That was a good festival, except the Dementors. There's nothing like having fun and then the feeling being sucked away instantly. Good job, forces of evil 👍

ORDER.

Hey folks. I don't know about any of you but I live on an island with a small population, so after discussing with Mum we've actually been talking to Muggles in our community saying we're collecting warm coats and blankets for homeless people in cities. Obvs didn't mention the wandless aspect to them, or much else to Mum. If anyone else lives in a sparsely populated area let me know and we might try there too. But it's a relatively quiet way of getting supplies for Fred's thing. Just wondered if anyone wanted some help on that.

I know far, far better people than me have moved back in with their parents but no one really warns you about just how awkward it is to start with? Say, when I was a kid I had to account for my every move. I don't feel like I have to now, but it's almost a habit. And don't get me started on the arguments about how my socks really don't need ironing, or the times they forget I'm there and slip into habits from when I was away at school.

The fridge is never empty though, that's pretty good.

And I def. got away with burning their copy of the Prophet today.

Ugh, anyway, it's only going to be temporary.