Musings

[All sent around midday today.]

[ Text to A. Gideon ]

i fink i ent in kanzus nemor

[ Text to S. Djaevelen ]

did you see me at all last nite? [...] or yesturday?

[ Text to S. Hawthorne ]

hey luv hows the wethur owtsid now?

[ Text to V. Anna ]

long tim no heer

[...] or wuz et?

[ Text to I. Hughes ]

did i partee wiv you last nite?

[Locked to C. Callahan.]

I'm sorry for confusing you the other day.  I'm hoping it won't happen again.

[Locked to R. Ignace.]

Ms. Ignace,
Thank you for speaking with me Sophie the other day.  I appreciate your taking the time to converse with me her in French.
Sincerely,
A. Henderson

[Phone call to A. Black]

Ring, Ring

Might I ask if anyone has been contacted about building a bloody ark?

[Posted absurdly late/early on the day of the shooting, depending on your perspective, and copious amounts of alcohol were probably involved.]

[Click for foul language and drunken ranting about how much Job hates people. You have been warned]( Read more... )

[C. Callahan]

[After tendering her resignation the week previous, which amounted to saying, 'Goodbye Joe, I'm getting married.']

Does the stage miss me, darling?

[R. Morgenstern & W. Cooper-Delaney]

Willow, you were planning on being in the wedding, I hope? Please let me know if [...] you'd prefer not.

Themes for the wedding. I was thinking in terms of colors, like a purple--lavender flowers? Irises? White lace? Help!

[Public]

One, or two?

[Posted at approximately 1 am]

ok so i no pplz hav bin takin bowt bat this n bat that wiv pplz stabin ech ovur n stuf but that ent imporunt

hoos seen that comix cum owt todae? wiv bat n that chik fiurflie

pplz shud be takin bowt that cuz seerislee hoo caers bowt sum gai in bat eers no offens bat wen thers a hot chik in FISHNETS to luk at?

i relly hop fiurflie is reel to cuz dam has neon seen her?

[Posted at around 10:30 pm on Thursday]

HAY YOU GAIS

i hav a qweshtun for you

WHOS YOUR DADDY????

First of all. I'm fairly sure what's going on is a VIOLATION OF RIGHTS. My right to a head free of outside thoughts and external invasions, and your right to keeping your deepest feelings to yourself. I don't want them, and I'm pretty sure you don't want me to have them; overall it's just a lawsuit in the making. Speaking of, to whatever sick, degenerate FUCKTARD is causing this: expect to hear from my lawyer once I manage to intimidate one into representing me pro bono. If I'm getting them from other people I can only assume SOMEONE is getting mine, and I'd LIKE THEM BACK. Or at least compensation for your idiot decision to steal them.

I would apologize to anybody who got mine, by the way, but it's not my fault the cumstain responsible shared. So instead, I just say YOU'RE WELCOME. Hopefully it gave some entertainment to an otherwise boring afternoon.

On a related note. If you are on the Board of Directors for Thomas, Inc and/or a soldier (no clue in what war, I would be more specific but apparently your brain isn't. WW1 or later is the best I can estimate), I would really appreciate it if you could get in touch with me. I've got a few questions for you both. You can reach me at [insert phone number and email address here] or just reply here.

[ Text message to A. Gideon ]

[Sent immediately after this]

gid i fink i hav cancur

[Posted at around 3 am on Tuesday]

so hoo reeds the papur nemor i no wiv internetz its lik wy reed but reedin is importunt cuz you lurn fings

lik hoo red abowt dat gai the sadist?

he kild lik all thos bad gais and it wuz owsum cuz its lik somtims you haf to kild the bad gais othurwis hoo can stop dem frum beeein bad all the tims? its so COOL

so all you pplz winin bowt oh dat gai isnt doin stuffs or dat gai shud be doin stuffs are just not sein all the cool stuffs goin on

its sad wen pplz mis cool stuffs

Restless. Just got home from work. My feet throb, eyes sting and I smell like I bathed in vodka, syrup and cigarettes. And despite the fact I'm exhausted I cannot seem to relax. Someone should bore me to death, that would certainly help. There must be someone here who can tell the perfect boring story.

Anyone?

[On Friday, March 18, the hung over creature stirs from slumber. By late evening, he's semi-functional and capable of basic cognitive thought. After a long, hot shower to wash off the dried blood and loosen up his muscles, the beast turns his attentions to some suspicious photos on his cell phone. In addition, he finds a suspicious new entry titled 007. As he nurses a mug of coffee - with bourbon in it, but who's counting? - he dials the number, and speaks the second the line picks up. His voice is distinctive, garbled Irish and American gutter-trash with overtones of hung-over and possibly-still-drunk slur.]

Is this James Bond?

[About five minutes after the blackout hits and doesn't seem like it's going away, the fourth floor of the Bathos is filled with music. It's loud, it's raucous, and could easily be heard from a few floors up and down - especially since all TVs have now been silenced. The person playing the song sings along loudly to the chorus, nearly screaming the word "blackout" when it comes up.

One can only hope he hasn't changed or charged his batteries recently.]

[These are put up after this, late on 3/8 (last Tuesday)]

[ Locked to J. O'Sullivan ]

[Connor actually uses capital letters in addition to spellcheck for this message. It takes some time to compose.]

Captain O'Sullivan. Do all air force pilots retire and become teachers?

[ Locked to A. Gideon ]

u got my fone call rite?

[ Locked to S. Djaevelen ]

u feelin bettur lad?

omg con someone just offered to take me flying!

March 2 is the feast day of Saint Agnes of Bohemia. She was gifted with divine prophecy and the ability to heal the sick. Not to be confused with Saint Agnes of Rome.

[ Text to S. Hawthorne ]

u ok? havnt seen in a wiyul

[ Text to A. Gideon ]

wut wurk u got?

[ Forum-Lock to V. Anna ]

whens ur nex bloos nite luv?

[ Locked to T. Pecker ]
[This takes several hours to type - Con has put a lot of effort into actually using spell check this time.]

listen up. i'm connor callahan and i'm saras friend. she told me wut happened on saturday and that your sending her to urop. i'm watching you. keep your distance and dont try anything. lass has been thru enough. i dont need her feeling responsible when i put a bullet in your head. play nice and i wont have to. you understand?


[ Locked to S. Djaevelen ]
[This doesn't take as long - Con stopped caring.]

weeks lik dis maek me miss nam

wanna shot fings?

"I had a friend who was a blues freak; he turned me on to blues. He was the same age as me and he understood rock'n'roll - he knew what Elvis, Fats Domino and Little Richard were all about, but he said, 'How about this?' It didn't take my love of rock'n'roll away and it added the real blues to my consciousness."

"The blues is real. It's not perverted, it's not thought about, it's not a concept - it's a chair. Not a design for a chair, or a better chair, or a bigger chair, or a chair with leather or design - it's the first chair; chairs for sitting on, not chairs for looking at or being appreciated. You sit on that music."

- John Lennon

Okay, so can somebody here tell me why they closed the Golden Dragon?  Two years it's been here, and now they decide it's hazardous to your health.  So is smoking, and MSG, but you still run across both every day.

And if you say it's got anything to do with the disappearance of cats in the area, they've never confirmed it.