Musings

[Posted on Creations forums, but (interestingly) not cross-posted to the hacker's blog. Obviously Boris doesn't use his real name for much.]

Don't worry, Monarch, step on out of the closet, we all love you!

[ Text to A. Morgenstern ]

I spoke with Jonathan about his penchant for calling me Daria. He informed me that he teases to demonstrate his approval of your choice and women. To show that I understood, I lead him on with a vivid story about a party I was planning for your siblings. The story ended with my admission that I had hired a prostitute for the occasion that had once been a man. He didn't seem to appreciate it.

[ Locked to G. Dailey ]

( In which Daryl asks a very reasonable favor. )

[ E-Mail to M. Morgenstern ]

Dr. Morgenstern,

I hope you have been well since I last saw you. I am contacting you to inform you of a case that I am working on that could benefit from the expertise of someone in the medical profession. Would you be interested in sharing your insights with me on this matter?

Thank you,
- Daryl

[Group email: J Morgenstern, A Morgenstern, L Morgenstern, M Morgenstern, R Morgenstern, O Monarch, D Galakis (I hope I'm not forgetting anyone)]

Hello family.

I hope this letter finds you all well. I know that I don't often email all of you in a large group like this, but I am writing because Mother has seen fit to finally let me escape her maternal crutches and live on my owe like a normal adult. Her one requirement was that I go with everyone else and settle in Seattle. I don't no how a long move is any better than simply finding an apartment nearby, but I didn't want to make her rethink her choice once she a greed. I imagine if I step out of line, I well be whisked back to Mother's so protective arms.

As it is, I am now residing in Seattle. My building is called The Bathos. Or maybe just Bathos. I'm not quite sure which. Surprise! I'm getting to know my apartment and running into things steel. I anticipate many bruises over the next few days because I'm too stubborn to use my cane in my own house. My lease states that I am allowed to have a dog, so I might finally get one. I wanted a helper monkey, but that idea was shut down. No fun.

So that is my important news. You may have noticed that my translation software has been on the frizz again and I hope I haven't sent anything two strange to any of you.

Your sister,
Iris

[This includes: O. Monarch, D. Galakis, J. Morgenstern, M. Morgenstern, L. Morgenstern, and R. Morgenstern]

Advanced warning: Daryl and I are looking at September third or tenth for the wedding. Any of you have objections to being groomsmen? Except Ro and Dagny; you can be bridesmaids.

[ A series of Text Messages to A. Morgenstern ]

( In which I begin to wonder if Daryl's source should have been the Runaway Bride )

[ Locked to R. Morgenstern ]

We need to make more headway on the wedding if we wish for it to take place in this decade.

[ Text to K. West ]

I don't care that you are the Chief of Police and thus extremely busy. We are having dinner. Tonight. There is no way out of this.

[ Locked to M. Main ]

I'm collecting the files on the Night Terror's past victims in Seattle and looking for a pattern that in of itself can implicate Charlie.

Since I will be spending the foreseeable future dealing with the explosions that happened yesterday, I would like to kindly send a message to the individual responsible for them. The police do not agree with you that might equals right. Just because you can blow people you're not fond of sky high does not mean you should, if for no other reason than that the hammer of the law will strike down upon you with force.

Unpleasant business aside, I'm a relatively new resident of the area, and I'm curious if anyone knows a good magic shop in town. Or a good coffee shop, while you're at it.

So. I got the most interesting message from your fiance. But colour me confused. I have no idea how to respond.

Is this for real?

I'd make a crack about the snow, but I think about a dozen people have already done that. So I won't waste anyone's time and get straight to the point. Name's Dagny Galakis, I'm new to Seattle, I'm looking for a job. Blah de blah de blah, I bet you guys all have heard this before. If anyone's hiring, I can give you a resume on demand. I've got work experience, so don't worry about having to show me how to turn a cash register on - I've got that covered.

Thanks in advance, chumps.

I'll be out of town for the next few days; I'm meeting Daryl out east. Then I'm moving with her to Bora Bora and never coming home If the lot of you could refrain from burning down the city, turning into crack heads, or inciting a mob of panty-less woman to rise up against you in the mean time, I'd appreciate that.

I don't normally do this, but does anyone know of any good bars around here, except for the irish pub on Main? Bumbling idiot spilled a drink  I got in a bit of trouble  he deserved it. I'm looking for a new place to spend my free nights at when I'm not working and my search isn't going that great.  Five dollars to whoever points me in a good direction.

[Phone call to A. Morgenstern]

Ring Ring

How likely is it that your being a mask is going to result in an ICBM exploding in my apartment?

Those who have been attacked by the birds and are in need of healing medical treatment, I am free to help whoever needs it. I do not charge anything, I am just looking to help. You may message me publicly or privately if you need help.

[The morning after this]

As a vigilante, do you know of any discrete individuals with healing abilities?

[Posted during this ongoing conversation]

[ Locked to A. Morgenstern ]

Rowan has brought to my attention that we must set a date for the wedding. Did you have any in mind?

[ Locked to K. West ]

This is a bit premature, as a date for the wedding has not yet been decided, but I wanted to inform you that you will need to be fitted for your garments as a member of the bridal party. I will take it upon myself to choose times that fit your schedule, or if need be, to change your schedule to accommodate.

[ Locked to S. Duncan ]

This is a bit premature, as a date for the wedding has not yet been decided, but I wanted to inform you that you will need to be fitted for your dress as a member of the bridal party. Should you have any ideas for the garments, please let me know. Relying solely on Rowan's tastes is a bit disconcerting You are welcome to offer input at your discretion.

What the hell is going on with the damn birds? If something's messed up in this city, chances are it's our doing, and you all know I'm right.

Are you CPR certified? This very educational video has convinced me we should look into CPR certification.

[Locked to the Morgensterns]
Back in Aubade, for now. A, thanks for helping Hayley out for me. Ro, I'm impressed you haven't yelled at me yet. I'm real thankful, and I'll remember it come Jewish Christmas.

[Group email to A Main, H Radcliffe and W Lowell]
We all settling back into a normal life after the flood and the shooting, or do we have to get the girls to show some leg to the press to get things back to running smooth?

[Call to V Anna, from his office]
Ring

Might I ask if anyone has been contacted about building a bloody ark?

[ E-Mail to A. Morgenstern ]
[Sent not long after this]

Mr. Morgenstern,

I hope you're doing well. I've contacted Mr. Monarch, and we've been talking about future plans. He wants to move Valerie and Willow to another apartment where they can't be traced, somewhere outside of Aubade or Bathos. I've found somewhere that will allow them to move in within three days if I put down two months' lease upfront. [...] Mr. Monarch told me to contact you about transferring to me the $1,263 dollars necessary for me to secure the apartment. I hate asking people for money even if I'm being told to

Thank you very much, and I hope you stay safe.

- Hayley

[ E-Mail to O. Monarch ]
[Sent after her e-mails with Adam conclude. The e-mail itself is a forwarded e-mail that had been sent to Hayley's account from "CherryField Management." The e-mail welcomes her to CherryField and includes the lease contract, pertinent information, and receipt for the $1,263 paid from her account.]

I can go pick up the keys on my own in three days, after which you can move the girls in whenever you want.

[ Texts to both E. Sablier and B. Sablier ]
[The texts are separate, but identical.]

If anyone calls asking about an apartment I rented, don't panic. My boss needed a backup plan and it couldn't be under his name. I'm not going anywhere.