TARDIS Communication Network

Notice to everyone on board, and that means everyone.

I want each and every one of you to come into the clinic for an exam. If I can get everyone listed, then we can keep better track of things here, which means if you end up ill or need help, we can treat you quicker and with less errors. Is that understood? It will only be a brief physical. I'll ask a few questions and if you're good you can have a lollipop.

Let me know when you want to stop by. I'm always here.

To the Doctors and Medical staff:

There is something I need which I'm sure you have in stock. The device is common in the future, from what I understand, and I'm willing to trade on your terms for it. I obviously don't have money but there are others things I could barter.

Does anyone want to help me set up a Christmas tree and decorate a little bit? Maybe it will feel a little more like home.

Would anyone mind telling me just where in the hell I am, and why my pager doesn't seem to be working? I mean, don't get me wrong. I don't mind the pager not working if it means I don't have to deal with Newbie paging me time after time after time after time with the same annoying eety bitty problems that a monkey could solve. But since I've never been here before and I'm not even sure where here is, I think I'd like someone to tell me what's going on. Hmmkay?