Considering how focused this generation is on digital media... do they even hire newspaper boys anymore? Is that still a thing or should I try to find something else I can do to bring in money?
[The image shifts and turns as Steve tries to figure out the device. It closes in on his face as he inspects the screen. Finding nothing to work with he sets it down with a sigh.]
Disappearing paper. Transdimensional travel. I'm dead, right? I died in basic and my brain's just making this up.