I Resist the Muses

You want me to talk about my family? I guess I never really got along well with Mum and Dad anyway. I mean, they sent me to Experiment House. It wasn't the best sort of school. I spent a lot of time hiding out behind the woodshed.

Scrubb's got his cousins (he says Harold and Alberta weren't great shakes as parents). They're all right, I guess. Just the oldest one, Peter, is very proper and sober all the time. Comes of being High King for so long, Scrubb says, and Edmund's not much better, but Scrubb doesn't talk about why. I don't want to ask him either. Aunt Polly and Professor Kirke are nice, but they're closer to the Pevensies and each other.

It seems I've chosen my family now. There's Scrubb, and Puddleglum and Glimfeather, and Rilian. I didn't know that his mother used to be a star. Tirian and Jewel and Puzzle, of course, and Poggin. I spend a lot of time out in the forests, but Lucy's closer to the trees than I am.

I'm not always sure I belong with all of them, but I'm there anyway.

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Scrubb's still a prat sometimes, but his parents are worse. My parents are just dull and boring. I remember the first time I met his cousins. Susan's like some of the older girls at Experiment House, but when she glances my way, I see something in her eyes that none of them had.

Scrubb invited me to this party. We're all getting together in London, those of us who've been to Narnia. Polly's like an aunt, and Digory's an uncle to three of the Pevensies. Scrubb and I stand off to the side, with Susan half a step further behind us, and he takes my hand. The movement is quiet, shielded by our bodies, but Susan sees it. She smiles knowingly at me, but it isn't like that. He's just Scrubb, and I'm just me. I don't want to grow into something I'm not, and I start thinking maybe Susan doesn't want to either.

Maybe she felt like she had to, though, if she couldn't get back to Narnia the way Scrubb said she couldn't. If I didn't have hope like that, I guess I'd want something to replace it. But right now I'm good, and if Scrubb and I are told later we can't go back, well, maybe I'll try to get to know Susan better. She seems like she'd be nice enough if she could stop trying so hard.

ooc: xposted to jillpole