AUSTIN FREENET

SENT FROM: callahan
TYPE: public message
TIME: December 2nd, 2:30pm

Thank you to all who nominated and voted in the very important Austin's Battle of the Santas. After a round of nominations and an even more exciting round of run-off voting, the people of Austin have spoken! Here are your selections:

Capitol District:
Santa Claus: Isaac Callahan
Mr. Claus: Kāne Van Dale
Elves: Nina Clarke, Kevin Clarke

LBJ District:
Santa Claus: Beau Waites
Mr. Claus: Nathan Posey
Elves: Nick Choi, Luc Flores

UMCB District:
Santa Claus: Pete Whelan
Mrs. Claus: Shelby Thomas
Elves: Lita Singh, Rose Montgomery

Greenbelt District:
Santa Claus: Max Mendelson
Mrs. Claus: Violet Holladay
Elves: Pikachu Garcia, Ryan McCormick

Congratulations to all. Don't forget that the Battle of the Santas will be happening at the LBJ Community Center on December 5th. Photos will be $10 and all money raised will go towards Austin's new orphanage foundation.

From the desk of Isaac Callahan,
Department of Justice Commissioner
Interim Mayor of Austin

Two additional notes:
1. I swear on the Texas State Constitution that I did not stuff the ballot box to win the role of Santa Claus.
2. If for some (absurd) reason you wish to withdraw your candidacy, please send me a private message.

From: mayor_clarke
To: ms_vaneeden, zachattack, journeyman, silvereagle, chiefkulseth, ricochet, callahan, legallyblonde, fireinthehole (group message)
When: November 9, 2019 -- 7AM
Type: Private Group Message

( Read more... )

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From: quidproquo
To: shadowed
When: November 9, 2019 -- 7:15AM
Type: Private Message

( Read more... )

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From: quidproquo
To: inthemiddle, 3dani, heykitten (group message)
When: November 9, 2019 -- 7:20AM
Type: Private Group Message

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From: quidproquo
To: sewwhat
When: November 9, 2019 -- 7:25AM
Type: Private Message

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SENT FROM: sweet-tart
TYPE: Public post
TIME: 11/8/19, 5:45AM

Happy Thanksgiving Austin! I hope everyone has awesome plans to celebrate with family and friends! But please be careful and avoid the turkey hangover. ;)

From: mayor_clarke
To: ms_vaneeden, silvereagle, chiefkulseth, ricochet, callahan, legallyblonde, fireinthehole, yolo, pikachu, firebird
When: 12:30PM

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From: mayor_clarke
To: burgerking, burgerqueen, sweet-tart, chiefkulseth
When: 12:35PM

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From: mayor_clarke
To: snapshot, chiefkulseth
When: 12:45PM

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From: mayor_clarke
To: callahan & inthemiddle
When: 12:50PM

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From: mayor_clarke
To: ms_vaneeden
When: 2PM

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SENT FROM: daddy_daycare
TYPE: public post
TIME: October 7th, 1:30 pm

Greetings Austin! My name is Beau, I'm a new schoolteacher in town and I'm looking for a few businesses, offices, or individuals that would be willing to host some field trips for some very energetic, very eager-to-learn preschoolers. I know having 10-15 little munchkins running around a place of business might not be everybody's cup of tea but if I could get a few of you to humor me, I'd love for my students to be able to experience Austin in a fun and educational way! If you have any questions about what the field trips would entail, or are yourself looking for a preschool or daycare for your own kids, please feel free to reply to this post, or shoot me a private message at your earliest convenience.

Unrelated but equally important, I heard there was a place called The Bar that was looking for part time work but when I dropped by it didn't seem like anybody was home? Did it shutter its doors or did I just drop in at a bad time?

Last thing, I swear. Anybody out there do alterations or tailoring? There's something about this Texas air that's got my three kids growing like weeds. I swear the oldest has shot up half an inch since we've moved here, and it's only been 2 days. If there was somebody who was handy with a needle and thread I'd love to throw some hems their way to be let down.

Sorry this post became a sort of "catch all" to all of my newcomer problems...it's the first time I've had more than two minutes to myself since we got to Austin and if I don't get it all my questions out in one fell swoop who knows when I'll have the chance next?

From: mayor_clarke
Type: Public
When: 9:00AM

Citizens of Austin,

As we begin to move forward from the tragic incidents experienced during the September 2019 events, our office is nearing the completion of its investigations. Our intent has been to determine probable causes, identify known and likely catalysts, and create plans for prevention.

We know that as the days pass and people fall to the virus, we are losing important and loved members of our community. Know this is not something that I or this office takes lightly. The nature of our world today is such that blanket promises cannot be made, but our goal is to honor their lives with improved prevention, security, and city-wide strength.

We have been in contact with state and city heads from other regions within the United States as well in order to learn more about and identify best practices. Barricade reconstruction and reinforcements continue in earnest and the information we've gathered has led to an improved understanding of the nature of the zombie virus and how it spreads.

I invite all citizens to contact me directly via this Freenet post if you would like to learn more about next steps.

Yours,

The office of
Mayor Nina Clarke
Austin, Texas

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From: mayor_clarke
To: ms_vaneeden
Sent: 9:05AM

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From: mayor_clarke
To: ricochet
Sent: 9:10AM

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From: quidproquo
To: shadowed
Sent: 9:15AM

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From: quidproquo
To: callahan, inthemiddle, heykitten
Sent: 9:20AM

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SENT FROM: sweet-tart
TYPE: Public post
TIME: 9/7/19, 5:45AM

Good morning everyone! The Doughnut Hole will be changing our hours of operation temporarily. If you're looking for your coffee or doughnut fix, come visit us between 6AM and 11:30AM. We're sorry for the inconvenience to those who need their afternoon pick-me-up, but we promise it isn't permanent! We'll also be running a special to make up for it! Buy any size drink and you'll get half-off your doughnut purchase!

Have a wonderful day!

SENT FROM: mayz
TYPE: public post
TIME: 9/2/19, 8:45 AM

omg it's RAINING. like, actual real rain. not a single blobby horror falling from the sky as far as the eye can see. i mean, god, remember how much that sucked? i never thought i would be so happy to look at rain and not have to worry about whether the landscape outside was about to turn into an infectious wasteland, but let me tell you I AM THRILLED TO PIECES ABOUT IT.

if it's still raining when i get home from school this afternoon, i am totally going to go out in the backyard and just ... idk stand out in a for a while and really really appreciate how normal it all is.

SENT FROM: inthemiddle
TYPE: Public Post
TIME: August 10th, 2019 - Late Morning

Hello Austin! Erase whatever it was you might have had penciled into your calendar for tomorrow night, because The Bar is hosting Austin’s very first speed dating night! You read that right, Austin’s #1 bar is branching out to help anyone and everyone looking for love to find that special someone.

Come out and be bitten by love! If nothing else we promise it's better than a zombie bite!

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SENT FROM: Demi Rafferty
TYPE: Group Text
TO: Bishop Coldiron, Arthur Jenner, Pikachu Garcia, Noa Bellamy, Sasha Whittaker, Bunny Dolan, Ryan McCormick, Violet Holladay, Nina Clarke, Savannah Posey, Pete Whelan, Lita Singh, Kitty Gilmore, Nathan Posey, Luc Flores, Nick Choi, Dani Diaz, Mina Kulseth and Bea Rodriguez.
TIME: August 10th, 2019 - Late Morning.

> Cancel whatever plans you might have tomorrow night because this is an official invitation to come out and be bitten by love!
> There will be booze, attractive people and hopefully good conversation.
> If there’s not don't blame us, we can’t control every conversation.
> Cherry and I would love to see your bright and smiling faces at The Bar on September 1st.
> Scratch that, they don’t even need to be bright and smiling. We just want to see you there!

SENT FROM: sweet-tart
TYPE: Public post
TIME: 8/8/19, 6:00AM


Good morning Austin! All your coffee and sugary doughnut needs have been solved!
The Doughnut Hole in the UMCB district will be open for business starting this morning!
So, if or when you’re on your way to or from Walker’s you should stop in!


TODAY'S MENU:

Chocolate Old-Fashioned & Assorted Cake with Sprinkles

Passion Fruit Poppy Seed (Raised) & Boston Creme

Every purchase of a doughnut comes with a free tall drink of your choice today.

SENT FROM: boomboom
TYPE: Public Post
DATE: August 5th, 7:45pm

And here I thought Austin was supposed to be civilization. I'll reserve my impressed gasps for when I get a classroom and students.

SENT FROM: legallyblonde
TYPE: public post
TIME: July 6, 6:30 am

Couldn't sleep and decided to finally get around to clearing out the closet in my bedroom. Course none of the clothes fit me and I swear the man had more clothes than the woman because there are so many suits. She had good taste in jewelry though.




This got me thinking about all the other people like me with houses full of clothes we can't wear... We should start some kind of community clothing drive seeing as I don't see the Gap reopening in Austin any time soon. Would anyone else be interested?

From: mcdreamy
Type: public post
When: 7/2, 8AM



Woke up in the middle of the night to this, bricks in my living room and kitchen, Hellhounds and zombies and soldiers duking it out in the front lawn. I mean it's not typically how I'd repay someone who put his ass on the line to help but i guess we all have our own way of saying 'thank you'

And now I have to go to work so here's hoping when I come home there aren't zombies living in my house.

FROM: burgerqueen
TYPE: public post
WHEN: 6/8/19, 11am

Who loves burgers and fries? If you're in the Barton Creek Greenbelt, it's your lucky day! Announcing the opening of Burger She Wrote - your soon to be favorite place to grab a bite to eat. Stop by and say hi, we'll make sure you don't walk away hungry.

Look for the big yellow truck, you won't miss it. Menu and location will always be evolving, so if you want us to come to your area just let us know. We'll do our best to oblige.

FROM: burgerqueen
TO: jurisdoctor, journeyman, and paced
WHEN: 6/8/19, 1pm

Hello! Olivia told me to get in contact with you all regarding a food truck potentially coming to LBJ tomorrow. My name is Violet, my partner Ryan and I have a truck where we make burgers. We're in the Greenbelt today but can be anywhere tomorrow and LBJ was suggested.

From: cherryontop
To: all usernames
Sent: 6/5, 11:30AM

If you haven't gone to get your rations yet, I highly recommend it today because we got actual steak sandwiches in the little bag!! If they are trying to win us over by giving us real food... I mean, I think it's working!!!!

--

From: cherryontop
To: bellagio
Sent: 6/5, 11:40AM

How are you??

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From: cherryontop
To: anyone whose username is not bellagio
Sent: 6/5, 11:45AM

Maybe this is a sort of unusual use of the Freenet, but I was wondering if there are any gay women out there who would be interested in someone really pretty and smart? Or bi/pan/sexualqueer women, whatever! Either way though, my friend is a real catch. I would absolutely date her myself if I wasn't straight.

Here are some things to know about my friend.

-- She's really pretty!
-- She likes to cover up her rockin' body with sweater vests and frumpy skirts, so if you're into that sexual librarian aesthetic she would be perfect for you!!!!
-- I'm not making up the part about her rockin' body by the way. Even though I'm straight I have seen her without her clothes on many a time!!
-- She is very smart and well-educated!!
-- She has resting bitch face which makes you feel very successful when you get her to smile!
-- Racists need not apply because my friend is super proud of being a WOC!!!

If you are interested in dating my friend, please send me a private message in order for me to screen applicants.

Type: Public- sent to DogPark and Friends
From: SomeTHING
Posted on April 2nd

Winona Margaret and Jackson Lee Morgan-Coldiron

Jackson was born 7:36 and Winona was born 7:45 PM on March 10

Winona was 4.2 and Jackson was 4.9.

Both are in good health. Mom is recovering.

( click here for picture )

Type: Public post
From: dixiesticks
When: March 07, after this

three little piggies hiding from the big bad wolf downtown. they huffed and they puffed and they squealed. that's what you get for putting your little piggy hands on girls. who's helpless now?

somebody might want to get them before the zombies do.

revenge is a dish best served now.

From: quidproquo
Type: Public & private posts
When: 3/5, 9:52PM, after this group message

You'd think that after almost three years, my mind would have learned that dreaming about fluffy bacon pancakes and cheese omelets is only going to wind up badly for both of us. (Me and my mind, just to be clear.) I'm no psychologist, but I vaguely recall from Psych 101 something about how the mind tries to protect us from mental trauma or recalling things that would upset us. I've got to tell my subconscious that recalling all of my favorite breakfast foods isn't doing me any favors.

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Private between quidproquo & duende

I was very sorry to hear about Mr. Heim. Can you tell me anything about what happened?

This is strictly off-record, for the record.

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Private between quidproquo & legallyblonde

Be careful. Aizik Heim's gone missing from the UMCB.

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Private between quidproquo & 3dani

I'm not sure if word's gotten around over there, yet, but Aizik Heim's gone missing and I thought I'd let you know. I swear, one of these days I'll have a pleasant reason to initiate contact with you. How've you been, by the way? (I ask that knowing that the answer may be colored by the news I've just told you.)

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Private between quidproquo & callahan

Aizik Heim's gone missing. I assume kidnapping, but that's all I've got to go on right now. Waiting for details; will pass on all I know. The APD's being left out of it, too.

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Private between quidproquo, andhobbes, & sirkay

All A-OK over there?

SENT FROM: firebird
TYPE: public post
TIME: March 4th, 3:48pm

i finished my latest cross stitch



anyway so i was out raiding the michaels, looking for more pattern and came across the grossest fucking thing

behold



dorogoy, now we know what to do when dozor sheds so much

[private to dog park]
and i made something for all the officers too. vic'll bring them to chapel

( we ride together, we die together )

From: dixiesticks
Type: public
When: 03/04, evening

baa-ram-ewe! baa-ram-ewe! to your breed, your fleece, your clan be true! sheep be true! baa-ram-ewe!

do i have your attention? lovely. some announcements, pardon the length but i have been away for a while. it is so hard to get a phone around here these days, isn't it. not to mention hair dye. you vain little sheeples, you.

i would like to thank my generous friends from the puppy pound who took such great care to liberate us poor souls that shared your fate. i was getting real tired of being beaten for looking at someone wrong
sincerest thanks to you sirs. may your coats stay shiny and life not be ever so ruff for you mutts.

dear ollie. go suck it.

pernell reason. be very afraid of what lurks in the dark. it might glitter and laugh. you and your men like laughing, don't you. this time i have a knife.

to my dearest clyde. i know you are out there, waiting for me to return to you. don't fret, my pet. i will find you. i promise.

now who went and cleared out the treasury? it was my favorite place to get decor for my humble abode. shame on you. shame.