net.

As much as I hate being stuck anywhere... current weather report for New York City is 30 degrees, DC is 30 degrees and snowing. And out here in the desert, it's 80 degrees and pretty much bikini weather.

I'm not going to check the weather report for Malibu, since I'd like my glass to remain half-full.

Anyone doing something today for St. Patrick's Day?



[Clint Barton]

Was that you?

I swear, I must be the only person so easily bored by Las Vegas. Fake or not.

And does anyone else find the talking statues in Ceasar's Palace as creepy as I do? I guess it's one way to educate tourists about the Classics but, tacky much?

[Tony Starks (all) + Howard Stark]

what have you all thought about, I'm regards to a business venture here? I'm assuming some raw materials might be hard to come by, if we want to take on manufacturing, but I'd be a lot less worried if you should probably have something to do besides taking full advantage of the complimentary everything in this city.

How sad is it that I'm reduced to having nobody to talk to about my problems except for a stupid electronic journal? What am I, a thirteen year old girl? Christ.

Anyway.

Talk about going from the penthouse to the gutter almost overnight. I had it all... and then the next morning, I woke up and it was all gone.

The Corps? Gone. Babs? Gone. Worst of all... Teresa? Gone.

I had the love of my life. After all these years I had her. She showed up here, and she actually WANTED to be with me. I felt like maybe, just maybe, there was some part of me that was salvagable. That maybe deserved  to be happy.

But I see what I am now. I'm always going to be the killer who doesn't deserve happiness. Who was I kidding to think that someone as good and proud as Cap would ever actually consider me a friend? Or that a woman as perfect as Terry would ever be with me?

Face it, Wade... you're garbage. It's all you've ever been, and all you'll ever be.

Wherever you are, Terry.... I miss you.

God it sucks to be unkillable.... when all you want is to die.

The French Connection: fine cinema.

[SHIELD]

With the influx of new inhabitants, please sitrep your quadrants. Additionally, filling in our ranks will be important. If you have potential recruits, do let me know.

[FILTER: Wade Wilson, Steve Rogers, Sharon Carter]

Agent Deadpool: I should hope you will think twice about ever suggesting that my actions (or my niece's actions) are determined by our menstrual cycles. This is your only chance, sir. And it is the only one - thanks to the Commander's good will and your unfailing loyalty to him - you are likely to receive.

...Tony?

I feel a little as though I'm waking up with an unaccounted for hangover.

Fucking Ragnarok.

I miss the sun.

Public service announcement: Everyone stop getting shot. Jesus.

[Tony Stark (63)]

so like where the fuck is Steve then.

Having been here nearly a fortnight, I still find myself on somewhat uncertain ground with this age. I have been watching the television to gain a better understanding, and find it puzzling how much time is spent on selling items--carts and the like. Pardon, cars. Is that truly what entertains people in lieu of drama and farce these days?

I suppose it is better than the shows on The apparently called Learning Channel.

[Filtered to Logan]

Your Jean Grey mutants. Can I ask about them?

Okay, so now that I've got the weird out of the way. Or, I mean, at least better established that what's going on here is weird, and what I'd look like if I were a woman. I guess it's time to figure out what we're going to do about it, so.

Avengers? Assemble.

(I'm Tony Stark. Obviously)

Situation Report.

So, it looks like what happens in Vegas does actually stay in Vegas.

What's up with that?

[The Winter Soldier]

I ran into some trouble, but the package has been delivered.

[Tony Stark (AU)]

Real sorry about today, Tony.

But I'm going to need you to stay out of my way.

[Tony Stark (AU)]

.... So I just saw Steve.

Approach Commander Steven G. Rogers (codename: Captain America) and Agent Natasha Romanova (codename: Black Widow) with great care if you must approach, but I recommend not at all. Both are known associates of the terrorist known as the Winter Soldier. If you catch sight of them, report the location immediately.

[SHIELD + Avengers]

Effective immediately, Commander Steven G. Rogers (codename: Captain America) and Agent Natasha Romanova (codename: Black Widow) are no longer serving members of our SHIELD organization. Any intelligence as to their whereabouts are to be reported to me immediately.

In their absence I hereby name Agent Clinton Francis Barton (codename: Hawkeye) and Tony Stark (codename: Iron Man) as the replacement handlers for their cells. If this is your cell, I expect you to show these agents the same respect you showed their predecessors.

Team Leads and Handlers: [SECURE WEB ADDRESS] holds a map drawn of the city and the outlying areas drawn into four (4) quadrants, one for each team. Divide them equally amongst you and organize your patrols forthwith. I want to know about any anomalies, and I wan us to track them.

first: firing arrows indiscriminantly into the city limits - total failure.

second: my phone won't call out in this jankyass city so now i have to use this dumbass private network thing.

third: i had a dog with me and now he is gone and he's technically not even mine, so.

four: has anyone seen a one-eyed dog, i guess.

I could have sworn I saw Leob

Anyone got some money I could borrow? I lost my Colonial bank card when all our planets were nuked.

...

What I need is a quart of Bushmills and a girl who can say damn without a blush and in a few hours time it will not matter where I am, who I am or what I am.

Hi everybody. Hi new people.

[SHIELD: All Units, Avengers]

I guess it's time we all talked about that to do, you know, about the elephant in the room.