Mission Atlantis

It's time to liven things up around here.

This weekend, I'm taking over Meteor. There will be drinks, dancing, debauchery... all the makings of the best kind of fun. Dress code is optional. Doors open around 6-ish Saturday night and close whenever I feel like it.

Who's in?

What the fuck is Chipolte, and why can I only eat burritos today and drink lemonade?


🌯 - The replicators only give food off the CHIPOTLE MENU. & 🍋 - Something is up with the water on the ship today. It's all coming out as lemonade! All of it. It seems something went wrong with the replicators and water systems today. Engineering must fix it!

Well, hello Poseidon! I'm one of your newest arrivals. The name's Stede Bonnet, but it seems many of you probably know my co-captain Ed. Anyways, delighted to be here and I look forward to getting to know all of you and this ship. She's quite gorgeous and spacious.

And quite frisky, as she gave me a welcome present of turning Ed and I into our five year old selves.

"Earl Grey Tasting Day" could mean anything. I thought we were tasting Earls and thought that sounded suspicious but the tea isn't half bad.

Hey! Purple hair guy! You want the video footage of your arrest? Cause I have it.

As for the rest of you. Meteor Bar is back and I don't plan on stopping the drink pouring until the supplies are empty. You're welcome.

This might be a weird thing to confess but I think talking to animals is just as cool as talking to other people so whatever. I keep finding myself talking to this lil bird and I keep getting the feeling they're talking back.

Edenia is a very lovely planet. I love just being out in the open with nature like this.

However, my kid is determined to befriend every animal he finds. While it's adorable, I'm also worried he's going to get bit by something, as he can't seem to understand that no, Ethan, you can't pet all of the wild animals.

Luckily, most of the animals are smart enough to flee when he starts running towards them, asking if they want to be his friend.

Really, it's his father's fault that he's like this.

Not to slander my mother's cooking, but last night was probably one of these best meals I've had in my entire life.

If anyone needs me today, I'll be in my suite, likely falling in and out of a food coma.

Best vacation ever! I got invited to some swanky dinner party. Luz, you're in charge while I'm out. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

Do you hate heights? What about heights and high speeds? Then you're really going to hate the air taxis. I'm pretty sure the one I just took broke the sound barrier — it was amazing. Not something I expected from a sightseeing tour. They should really advertise those as an amusement ride.

Is anyone else going to the cocktail class at Meteor? I'm hoping to learn to mix some fun drinks.

It seems very strange to call this a ship when there are no sails and no water. But I heard tell that there's some people I might know here. Stede? Ed?

Name's Jim.

To everyone on the Poseidon:

Our intrepid Commander of the Magical Department and expert on all things dad jokes and music trivia Dr. Stephen Strange is too modest to tell you his birthday is on Saturday, November 18. You're all invited to help me bully him into celebrating with us at the Meteor Bar for a few rounds of drinks and karaoke.



See you at 7 p.m. tomorrow. Bring your best (or worst) songs. And if you're too shy to sing, I'm pretty sure listening to me struggle through a simple melody will help boost your confidence.

With love,
Someone Who Is Too Invested In Birthdays

Not the ship I was expecting to find myself on but it's also not the first time I've found myself somewhere unexpected.

Guess I should introduce myself. John Constantine. I dabble a bit in magic. They've got me housed in Deck B - Number 5. I'm also a Taurus for those of you wondering.

Right. Now that's out of the way. Where can I get a drink?

I'm still not fully convinced that I haven't succumbed to a fever if I'm being honest.

To the people who greeted me when I arrived my apologies, I genuinely thought I had been kidnapped, hence the screaming, I've calmed down now.

My name is Eloise Bridgerton, I'm from England and apparently very far from home. I've rarely been anywhere without a chaperone so this is a new experience for me.

[Filtered to Bianca DiAngelo]

Ms. DiAngelo, it appears we will be sharing the same accommodations, I'll try not to be too much of a bother.

Filtered to Edward Teach

Captain Teach, we've not been properly introduced; My name is Tinkerbell and I believe you recently found out some information about me because of this weird bonding/secret-sharing exercise the ship has put in place. If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine we can just go on knowing what we know.

How interesting we have a few of our esteemed colleagues singing love songs to each other and today I get a ridiculous little paper talking about love. It would seem someone is attempting to tell us all something.

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[ SECRETS PLOT related ]

Bianca Barclay's birthday is tomorrow. She's my rival — competitive and exacting — and nothing less than a ship-wide competition will do for a celebration. So Thing and I are hosting a race.

The rules are simple: teams of four will each sail a canoe out onto the lake. Once you reach the island in the middle, there will be a simple obstacle course waiting for you. Make it through to reach your team flag and retrieve it. You can send your whole team for this, part of it, or only one. It's your choice — but choose wisely. I designed those obstacles myself.

First team to return to shore with their flag will win the Poe Cup. It's a tradition at our school, and Bianca is very good at it.

If you insist on observing the tradition of giving gifts, she likes blue, silver, water motifs, and fencing. I could use help painting the canoes with appropriately intimidating imagery, and ideas on how to keep Bianca away from the lake today while I prepare. [...] Hosting birthdays is not my forte.

Because some people are animals (and I need to have it in writing to confirm I am, in fact, correct), I'm posing this to the wider group (and yes, there is a correct answer):

Water on the toothbrush before or after you add the toothpaste.