( Group Text to Nat, Yelena, & Bruce. )

( Text to Val )

[Texts to Remy LeBeau]

-- I don't know if you're even getting these.
-- But what the hell is going on?

> so while we were on that mission
> I ended up kissing Pete
> as part of our cover

> Pack your bags, Pryde.
> We're going to Madripoor.

[Texts to Rogue]

›› Want to join Kitty and I for mimosas and shopping today?
›› And you can help me talk some sense into her.

[after this]

I need your help.

(1) Friday told me that Drax hasn't returned after telling her he was going to get something to eat.

(2) Pinged his phone. He's in a nearby park but not answering: [coordinates link]

(3) Quill, want to go make sure he's all right while med clinic is on standby?

(1) I'm back, bitch!!!! Miss me?

(2) That's a stupid question. Of course you did. Give me money. I have a job still, right?

> Still sussing things out at headquarters.
> Returning tomorrow evening.
> How are things at the Professor's?

[After Thor's message to Steve]

We've been in interviews all day. Thor's going out with Steve but I just want to lay in bed and eat cheeseburgers.

Come hang out and keep me company?

[private to Tony]

(1) Okay. You were right. I can't stop thinking about flying and how much fun it was.

(2) What say we get Happy to come over this weekend, and you and I can go out in the suits?

(3) And if you start singing 'A Whole New World' or find some way to play it through the soundsystem, I will divorce you. Fair warning.

Happy Father's Day :)

[a few minutes after this airs]

» I expected it to be bad.
» but not that bad.
» I'm so angry I almost broke this stupid device

> I think New York airspace is finally under control again.
> I've had air traffic control in one ear and Ross yelling in the other ear.
> My head hurts. Do we know what the AF happened?
> With Loki or Thor?
> Also I'm gonna have to go to DC again. Do something nice when I get back. I'll have earned it.

> I wanted to check in but I realized I don't know what to say other than 'are you ok?'
> And I guess if you still want that date we're going to have to wait a while.
> I'm sorry.

I see our interesting times will never cease. Let me know where you'll be. We can meet up and help with some of the civilians and damage.

>> What's going on?
>> Are you okay?
>> Should I need to be worried?

(1) Okay, first off, please tell me you're aiding and abetting your crazy boyfriend because that video that's going around? Looks SUPER bad for you.

(2) Also I know he's not crazy but I'm not in a good mood right now.

(3) Also also, you look like crap. Are you okay? Are those Asgardians feeding you right? They know what vegetables are right? I'm totally swamped so replies may be delayed but all these weird texts are my way of checking in on you and telling you I love you.

( Group message to Tony and Thor )

(1) Suuuup bitch
(2) I'm back, yo!
(3) Sandwhich and cuddle time?!

(1) Girl.

(2) I haven't seen sunlight in days. My hands are chapped from constantly washing. I am living on granola bars, twizzlers, and questionable liquids.

(3) Tell me news of the outside world. Give me strength to go on.

[text to Darcy]

> Hey, wanted to let you know that press release is still on hold.
> Trying to do it near the Senate hearing, which kept getting pushed back.
> Because monsters.


[text to Bruce and Hope]

> You both have chemistry and genetics experience.
> Can you double check samples from the drones?
> I've ran them three times and it's looking like vaguely super and soldiery.
> Like someone aimed and missed the bulls eye by a couple of rings.


[text to Rhodey]

> Any government rumblings about where Godzilla's buddies originated from?

>> Well this will certainly help put a cherry on the PR repair.
>> What do we tell him?

( Texts Within. )

[text to Dr. Strange]

> Hey sir! So if you're busy I totally get it, but could I ask for a favor? I have a gift in mind for someone but it's all the way in Italy and I can't exactly afford to get there. It's not something that anyone makes anywhere else.

> If there's any way you could help me with the traveling part I'd owe you bigtime!

> I wanted to let you know that I'll be in Seattle at Christmas. Probably not for long.

> How are you? Any problems in this trimester?

(1) Okay, vacation take 2. This time, there shouldn't be any end of the world catastrophes, right? Right?

(2) Even this crazy universe has to give us this month to relax. That'd be the best present.

(3) Followed by you not banishing my parents to a parallel universe where Satan does Christmas, a la Krampus.

[Tony]
>> Don't wait up.
>> God I sound like you
>> I'm finishing some PR damage control.
>> I only have three more Skype interviews, and seven more questionnaires to fill out.
>> Make sure Morgan eats some vegetables with her pizza.

[Bruce]
>> When did you and Agent Morse start dating?
>> That's wonderful!
>> I can help you with the tux.

> I'm leaving.

[waits 30 seconds before sending the next text]

> It's only temporary.

> I know that you are busy seeing to this mess of Stark's making.
> I wish to convey my gratitude for your aid whilst I was unable to act for myself.

Texts to Thor:

[1] Your Highness, I regret to report that trouble has befallen New Asgard that requires your immediate attention.
[2] Your brother, Prince Loki, has fallen ill and I cannot rouse him.
[3] He was apparently testing a Stark device for augmented reality.
[4] I am taking him to New York to find out what is happening and get help from Tony Stark.
[5] Please come to New York. You will find us at Stark Tower.
[6] Please also let me know as soon as you receive these messages.

Texts to Jane:

[1] Doctor Foster, I regret interrupting your much-deserved holiday with Thor.
[2] An emergency has arisen with Prince Loki and I am taking him to New York for help. His peril does not seem mortal but I cannot rouse him.
[3] I have contacted Thor with the details and a request to come to New York.
[4] If you receive these messages and he does not, please ask him to contact me.
[5] Thank you for all your help and I am very sorry to disturb your private time.

>> Hey Doc
>> Had a good time last night
>> All things considered

I've heard from Thor about a decidedly odd matter. I'll be visiting him for a few days.

I'd like you to watch over the village in the meantime. The dungeon is complete and at your disposal should you need it for any reason.

The Valkyrie is away on the long task of gathering winter provisions for the entire village.

I do apologize for the short notice.

There is another plane of existence on this realm. I have learned greatly through research with Darcy about the various polter-ghosts that haunt.

I am at a loss why this terrifies Midgardians so. Should they not feel comforted by this? Knowing their ancestors are watching their every move, moving furniture so that they feel reassured?

This realm continues to confuse me.

[1/2] I seem to be in a of habit dropping down into a research rabbit hole and not resurfacing for longer than I'd like.
[2/2] Anyway, I'd like to say thank you for the lovely evening out the other night. I look forward to our next one. How have you been?

>> Finished with some debriefing in DC.
>> Flying back up to NYC tonight.
>> You two going to be around tomorrow?
>> Chance for me to check in with Miss Morgan?
>> I might have brought her a gift from the Smithsonian
>> You too Tony. Don't be jealous.

>> I can't find Bucky.

[Text to Nick Fury]

- Hey so.
- As the kids say.
- WTF.

>> Hey
>> You busy this weekend?

So, uh... did you have a chance to look over those test results?

(1) Okay. I'm as proud and child free as you, one thing that we never had to argue about but Stephen. Really. I mean, REALLY.

(2) Calling a pregnancy a 'demonic possession'? Sure, there's the throwing up and the weird sleeping and bad dreams and yes, TECHNICALLY, a foetus is a parasite. But goddamnit, don't freak me out about demons when it's just what happens when people have sex.

(3) I even called my MOTHER and asked her to casually pray for me, just to be on the safe side. She cried tears of happiness, made my dad get on the phone with her and I had to listen to a 3 way blessing. By the way, I'm dragging your ass over there for Thanksgiving this year.

(4) So. Long story short. No demons, just a baby that will one day projectile vomit. And projectile crap. Sometimes at the same time.

>> So, how do you feel about suddenly being in the future?
>> It's kind of weird.
>> Want to go grab a drink?

>> Meu drăguţ
>> Can you pick up a few things for me, before you get home?
>> Whenever you get home

Can I ask you a question?

About women?

> We have a new arrival, Ava Starr. She's having some phasing issues after the transference. I've escorted her to the basement of Stark's where the quantum tunnel machine is.

> I can open a portal so you can help her, if either of you are available.