Text to Jane
(1) Okay, first off, please tell me you're aiding and abetting your crazy boyfriend because that video that's going around? Looks SUPER bad for you.
(2) Also I know he's not crazy but I'm not in a good mood right now.
(3) Also also, you look like crap. Are you okay? Are those Asgardians feeding you right? They know what vegetables are right? I'm totally swamped so replies may be delayed but all these weird texts are my way of checking in on you and telling you I love you.