Knowhere IC

Um. So, I did a bad thing.

But it's okay! I swear! I've got it all under control. Everything is okay.

I didn't want the tribbles to just get sterilized and die out completely because they're so cute and lovely, but I didn't know they reproduced... you know asexually? (I honestly thought it would take two! I'm so dumb.) I, uh, ended up with about ten of them because I took one with me when we evacuated.

I spoke to Mercy in medical and she agreed to neuter them or spray them or whatever and they're in there right now under surgery. They're going to be up for adoption once they're all healed in two weeks. I'm going to keep one. Does anyone else want to adopt the others?

[Filtered; James and Lily Luna after this]

We're going to earth. We've got to get off this thing if there's any chance in hell you spawn the future, Jamie.

Once these things are frozen can anyone perform surgery on something that small? Stop them from breeding? We'll have a chance then while they're still to stop them from multiplying. Or some magical fix? I don't know much about magic...

We'll need someplace to send them too.

Delta's been crunching numbers and he's been so uptight about it he won't let me think.

We noticed food start to go missing on the 19th at around 11am, that's about 110 hours ago. The tribbles reproduce every 12 hours, with litters of up to ten. If we say it took about 100 tribbles to make that much of a dent in our food supply back on the 19th, and average each tribble having 6 babies each..

If we started with 100 tribbles on the 19th, saying each has 6 babies every 12 hours, at 110 hours.

And assuming a few have died off since then (what's the life expectancy on these things?)..

We should have about 1,007,769,600 of these things on Knowhere as of right now. By tomorrow at this time, 36,279,705,600.




We need to start killing these things. Right now.

[Edit]

Harry? Carlos? Li-Ming? James and Sirius? Am I missing any wizards?

Someone gave me a hug.

A hug.

And not like a fleshy human hug where some idiot wraps their arms around another idiot, but a stupid hippo-looking stuffed animals that vibrates when the idiot on the other end of the wifi pushes a button.

I don't need a fucking hug.

What I need is to get laid, because I haven't in like three days.

I will find you and I will skin you and wear your face as a hat.

So how does one go about getting an apartment here?

The talking dog isn't sure if my Mum or Da are here. He said the last name sounded familiar, though? Has anyone seen a Ginny or Harry Potter running around? I've never been this far from home. I think they're probably worried about me.

Because, you know, I'm in space for some reason. This is completely crazy! I'd like to go home now. I already miss Hugo. He's not going to know what to do without me.

Ugh.

Listen up.

I am not nice.

So whoever has that notion in their head, just know that I would kill you for a Klondike Bar.

What are the good things everyone's missing from home today, eh?

Tonight, for me, it's grass. Reckon I might make some outside the barracks if anyone wants to spend some time outside on a proper bit of ground. Bring out your blankets, maybe we'll have a picnic or camp or something.

I've determined James and I are the freaks here. 'Dust Bunnies', gigantic fleas, and strange little pocket places are par for the course at home. It's all strangely comforting, really.

But, since we are the freaks, you lot must all be decidedly normal. How wonderful for you.

You know how I know James is more of a freak than I am though? He married a redhead and he actually likes the weather in England. We went to Spain on my request because I'm not a freak that enjoys the dreary clouds, he complained, but I was the one that burned.

That was different, and something I never thought in a million years I'd see. Good to see everyone seems safe, especially the people that had been stuck in that place for a bit. Thank you to the ones that found a way to get us out and now that I've had some sleep and eaten I can catch up on what I missed around here.

Jason is gone. I went to go see him and...yeah. Guess that's how today is going. I have to say I'm pretty tired of space.

Oi,

York. James and I are fucking off to earth for a week. My pasty self needs some sunlight before I turn translucent. If your ceiling falls apart while we're gone James will fix it when we get back.

Look after my bike while I'm gone, yeah? Don't let your homicidal friend put her murdery hands on it.

Um, so when did the barracks get a sky..? I mean, I was just there the other day, and I went in today and.. there's the sun? And clouds?

It looks like rain.

What happened?

Who: James & Sirius
What: Sirius is upset, James helps
Where: Someplace in Knowhere
When: After this
Warnings | Status: None | Log - Complete

( He’d come back to himself in a moment, but for a minute he just wanted the comfort and it was always easier to ask as a dog. No one minded animals, everyone touched them much more freely than they touched people. Sirius knew this from experience, too.  )

Hey. If you live in the barracks, don't freak out about the ceiling, alright? We're going to set up sky in that building for a little while because everything about this place is fucking dreary. It's just some simple magic and if there's weather, you won't be able to feel it or anything. It's just to cheer this place up.

Good? Great!

Cheers, everybody.

Oi, you lot,

Sirius question:

When you get up to go to the loo at night do you all turn the lights on?

So it's been a few days and I haven't woken up from this weird dream. Figure I might as well say hello, my name is James Potter. Lovely to meet you all. I'm sure my reputation precedes me, etc. Are there things a magical person such as myself needs to know about the non-magical space... world? If it's a world?

Oi!

Where the bloody hell is that little bugger that doesn't speak English? I'm going to flush him down the toilet then pitch him down a flight of stairs.

Who: Sirius Black & James Potter
What: Two boys being goofy
Where: The barracks
When: Backdated to James' arrival
Warnings | Status: None | Complete

( They’d maintained their cheerful banter on levels of giddiness that both of them knew were lies. Sirius was freaked out and he knew James well enough to know the other boy was, too. )