You people are ridiculous. So you hate Christmas - well, suck it up, because you're not ruining this for everyone else around here. Don't you think I want to be with my kids this time of year?
Even if you're without family and friends, that doesn't mean you can't forge new ties or sit down at someone else's table to enjoy a feast. Anyone without family or friends is hereby cordially invited to our Christmas party. Unlike Kaya, I've actually celebrated it before.
And to avoid food poisoning, I will fix the damn bird. Gotta have some gumbo too.