Spinning Compass Network

Oh hello 2024, how are you all doing?

My twin sister married her very dull beau around this time of year about a century and a half ago. I am, of course, the kindest and most considerate of brothers and chose not to celebrate her nuptials with a simple pre-written card conveying my well wishes and general fondness for the happy couple. No, my messages were far more personal, mostly including puns that might cause my sister to shout in frustration so loudly that I might hear her even though we were continents away.

As, for obvious reasons, I cannot send her my regards, I have decided to inflict a pun upon you all. This was dear Evie's favorite, I know because it always had her howling with laughter. Or perhaps she was howling because I ducked when she launched her shoe at my head. No matter, enjoy with my compliments:

"Why should a candle-maker never be pitied?"
Because all his works are wicked, and all his wicked works, when brought to light, are only made light of.

Hey... Everyone.. I'm Reeve Adler.. Most of you may know my mom and dad, Scarlet and Blank Adler?

If you do, then you know me as a baby? Well... I'm not anymore, and I'm not sure why, but I'm from twenty years in the future now. Please, don't ask me your any of your futures.

I can't, and/or won't tell it to you, mostly because our futures may not be the same? ... Sorry, I've been told that I: "have my mother's beauty, and my father's awkward." Anyway! I'm happy to be here!

I don't know who to thank, so whoever you are... Thank you for adding my Daddy's name to the wall.