Welcome to Night Vale: In Character

Don't mind Cecil. He's sweet, but he worries too much about some things. The woods outside of town are completely harmless. Not the forest he said turns people into trees. That one is probably not so harmless. But my woods won't hurt anyone. In fact, sometimes people find what they need there.

So this is what happens when you die.

Gotta say, I was expecting a little less sand.

If someone's misplaced a god of thunder recently, could you please come pick him up from where he crashed into my apartment?

What the hell is this place supposed to be? If I wanted a sandscrub and a sauna, I'd have hopped a flight to Glen Ivy for a seaweed wrap and massage from someone named Ramon or Paul whose biceps are bigger than his head, not ended up in Hell Desert, Bumfuck Nowhere.

Who else is here and where's the door back and what the fuck happened?

I think I'm starting to like this place.

It's strange, but it's better than things were back home. Or the way that they were going to be.

There are some really nice things about this town, in any case.

brakebills group.

I wish Kady and Josh were here. And Alice. I know she did some awful things, but I'd feel better knowing she was okay.

caleb.

How are you doing?

You know you can come visit any time.

It has been way too freaking long since I've had a vacation, so I'm just going to roll with this.

Someone point me in the direction of a Mai Tai?

Getting dragged to another fucking world against my will. Must be a Tuesday.

Where's a good place to get drunk around here?