It's all AU.

"Hello," he said pleasantly. "Care for an ice cream?" He handed her one of two cones he was holding. "Don't worry, that one's a perfectly normal flavor -- mint, I think. Mine's tea. Did you know there's tea ice cream? I should've but didn't. Now, if we can get someone to make a celery flavor, I'll be all set."

The instant River Tam blammed into fake New New York, she *screamed*. Reeled back from the people all around who felt wrong, and tried to scramble into an alley way.

"It's very very loud in here," she whimpered, cowering and mentally flailing for the solid mental presence that had been shielding her, when her barely existent natural defenses had failed her for the last few months. Too. Much. Input.