Project Papillon [Network]

So now that we ain't all married any more I plan on going out tonight. My "husband" was a nice enough guy and all but I'm definitely glad I can walk wherever I want and do my job and stuff and I imagine he is too.

So if anyone wants to come along and celebrate bein' single with me I'll be at Mr. Crowley's bar tonight!

filtered from the law
And I'll be off the clock, just sayin'

As you might have noticed, Miss Harvelle is a vampire now. No, I didn't do it. Yes, I will take care of her.

She can't survive on animal blood. I would appreciate it if someone could find some kind of blood source for her, since I can't leave this apartment. Donations are accepted. She's barricaded herself in the bathroom, so if you have any well-wishes, by all means, let me know and I will shout them through the door.

Um, hi other person in my apartment. I went out to the living room when I woke up 'cause I was gonna run away but I guess I can't get too far away from you. I'm Becky. I really hope you don't take this the wrong way but I don't wanna be married or nothin' and it wasn't my idea so when you wake up and see this don't be mad at me.

Why is this happening to everyone? This is really gonna mess up business

...That is definitely the wrong redhead.

I'm already married to a brilliant redhead. I don't need another one. Or anyone else for that matter. Could we please rectify this? And quickly? I would quite like to return to my redhead, if it's all the same.

Hey! Whoa! Whoa! Wrong British guy, persons-or-potentially-just-entities-responsible-for-this.

You can't randomly marry an already married woman to someone else just for kicks because, hey, polygamy is pretty much illegal everywhere and even if it weren't, it's still wrong and I don't like it and I want to go back to my British guy now please and thankyouverymuch.

This is so cool.

Except not.