Gooseberry High

[Warded to Sophomores]

GUYS.

My older brother sent me an owl today. I had asked for some movies that aren't questionable sequels, but when I opened the DVD case, it wasn't what I thought it was (It was supposed to be Thor, btw, which I know is a sequel but has CHRIS HEMSWORTH in it so it's allowed) The movie disc says it's RATED R, though, and it sounds super exciting. It's apparently called Eyes Wide Shut? Which seems thriller-esque to me and means that we NEED to check it out since the fates have given us this gift.

WHO'S IN?

( MOVIE NIGHT )

Very funny guys. When I said you could borrow my jewelry for bait I didn't mean all of it and I meant for the day. So you can bring it back now.

[WARDED TO JACOB]

bro
i'm in a closet
some shitass freshmen LOCKED me in a FUCKIN CLOSET
you've gotta get me out

and this isn't some fuckin gay joke bc homophobia's not a joke k

[WARDED TO CRICKET; each is a separate attempt to ward her.]

where the fuck are you

hey crick sup
where u at

hey girl

sup

brolita help a bro out

you know those fuckin closet metaphors we talked about
it's not a fuckin METAPHOR rn

[WARDED PRIVATE]

this is some fuckin r kelly shit cept i don't have a fuckin gun or a wife or like
i dont wanna be in here for 33 chapters
its all weird n dark n shit n it's too hot

IT'S NOT A DUMBFUCK METAPHOR
a haiku by CASEY
trapped in a closet
by some dumbfuck freshmen twerps
what the shit to do

A FUCKIN LIMERICK ABOUT BEIN TRAPPED IN THIS FUCKIN CLOSET
a limerick by CASEY
there once was a bro called casey
last summer he fucked a girl called tracy
fuck this i'm bustin out like it's JAIL and i'm OUTTIE

[Casey proceeds to Kool-Aid Man his way out of the closet.]

[WARDED TO ROBIN]

where the fucks your shitass brother hang out i'm gonna fuckin kill

[WARDED TO TESS & RAFAEL]

vector or some fuckin narc's gonna tell you i broke a door
it wasnt my fuckin fault
the fuckin door had it coming

and like don't worry about the fuckin white knights that made it happen either i've got them covered k

CASEY out

[Kat, Riley, Quinn, Jesse, Diego, Chris]

Prefacing this with: Kat, I'm sorry again that all your jewelry got stolen.

ok but like

also


If staff does room checks, we're fuq'd.

If we bury our shit in the woods, is the Chupacabra/Anon gonna take it? Should I do a trial burial? HOW ARE WE GONNA HIDE ALL THIS BOOZE AND WEED??

Quiet tonight.

[Warded to Quinn]

So. I'm not sure what's up, but my cabin's completely empty. Want to come by for a while?