#culturejournals

just a friendly reminder that we have a division that is specifically in charge of dealing with pest infestations and it's called the Pest Sub-Division if that was too hard to figure out. they're the ones you want to deal with issues like the bundimun infestation a woman in Norfolk keeps sending in howlers about. also, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar, so if you want someone to help you save your home from being eaten, maybe try not insulting them. even if your insults are incredibly creative.

found a lotta ogden's premium laying around or sommat. ol' dung's in a sharin' mood.

Hey Class of '06, is it too early to plan a ten year reunion?

[Emmeline and Andy]
Girls' night this weekend?

[Emyr]
Late night tonight? I only ask so I know if I should get a lot of takeout or a LOT of takeout.

I am quite busy and have not been able to keep up on the latest trends - are caricatures "in" now? Thinking about bringing one into the office to take meetings for me when I have other matters to attend to.

(That was a joke. I wouldn't do that. I take my job very seriously, and the Minister's Office is no place for silly pictures.)

So I decided to brave Diagon Alley today because Scribbulus was having a back-to-school sale on quills and inkwells (and anyone who knows me knows I'm a sucker for office supplies). I was just about to Disapparate when a vendor called out to me. "A caricature for the missus!" he said. "Just what your home needs!" he said. "Your lucky husband will love it!" he said.

Well, I don't know about those last two things but I do have to admit that it's provided quite a bit of entertainment while P&P napped--honestly, I'm a little bit jealous that this cartoon is snarkier than the real me. But now the girls are awake, I've got an entry to write and the caricature keeps yelling obscenities that have bypassed hilarity and head straight into obscene.

Finite incatatum isn't working, so I'm two seconds away from drowning my sketchy self in a pot of boiling water if I can't find another way to shut it up.

Thank you, whoever sent me my caricature, but I refused the blasted thing for a reason. It's being suspicious and -- oh! It's gone. That bodes well.

[WARDED TO JONAH & ANNIE & AUGGIE]

Confess your sins. Was it one of you? Is this payback for the muggle dry run? Because it hasn't even HAPPENED yet!

[ooc: edited to include augie on the JAM filter, pretend it was JAAM all along~]

one of my wolves thought it'd be swell if we had a presence on the internet. i think i prefer using journals better. but who aM I TO TURN DOWN ANOTHER WAY TO GET CLOSE TO MY PREY? YOU ALL REALLY LIKE POSTING ALL YOUR PERSONAL INFORMATION ON THIS THING. I'M SURE YOU'LL ALL BE SEEING A LOT MORE OF ME IN THE FUTURE.


[ OOC: TW in Comments: cannibalism, stalking, descriptions of gore ]

Someone should come hike a mountain with me.

Okay, who did this.



THIS IS NOT FUNNY.

First day back on the job. Is it always so hard, leaving them behind?

WARDED TO GAWAIN ROBARDS

Would you be up for a working lunch tomorrow? I'd like for us to go through everything we have on the case so far, while we wait on the rest of the evidence. I think, too, we should consider going to the scene again tomorrow. See if we can piece together anything else. Perhaps schedule a meeting with the Hitwizards, to see if they can share anything about their Bones investigation that might assist in ours.

Do you think it might be worthwhile to bring on one of the younger Aurors? It's a big case, and we could probably do with an extra set of eyes. An extra set of hands for the paperwork, too. I was thinking about Shacklebolt. I think it would be good for him.

WARDED TO NATASHA

Do you have time for a quick catch-up tomorrow? An afternoon coffee break? I'm feeling — strangely rusty.

WARDED TO MINERVA, MOODY, FRANK, DORCAS & EDGAR:

I've managed to snag a spot on the investigation. Will keep you apprised as we go. And Edgar — we're going to catch them. I promise.

Today my grocer went on a rant (perhaps rant is too strong) about Quorn and meat substitutes in general. Now I'm second-guessing what to serve vegan dinner guests. Kale? Other foliage?

There was karaoke last night and not only did I hear the same Celestina song 4x (4x, for emphasis) there were 3 rousing editions of Spirit Division's big hit. I urge every single one of you who does karaoke to please, please be more original. My ears need it.

[ WARDED TO MWPPLM ]

Before Dorcas agreed to do afternoon training sessions with me, I honestly thought for a minute I'd be doing them with Moody and he would ask me 200 questions each time and try to make me admit I'm on drugs.

Its so dreadfully DIFFICULT being so famous. You get blamed for everything, good AND bad.

OOC: This would be Garnet Rivers, the vampire named on the WNN as a potential involved party.

My absolute sincerest condolences to the Bones family in this tragic time. May your hearts truly find some measure of peace.

That said, and not to brag, but Draco has mastered the art of rolling from his tummy to his side and has done so at least half a dozen times in the last several hours. He's certainly advanced for his age, just like his father, and his smile is utterly delightful, just like his mother's.

For anyone who hasn't heard, we've lost my parents, Simon & Marigold Bones.

Thank you for the support and condolences we've received thus far. We trust the DMLE in the investigation of their deaths, and have no further comment on the circumstances. We ask that you give our family time and privacy during this trying time. We know they affected many lives, and appreciate the wealth of kindness the wizarding world has shown them in return. We will miss them more than I can put into words.

If you would like to donate to one of their favorite charities in lieu of sending flowers, I've listed them below.

Thank you again for your support and understanding.

[charity listings]

[HESTIA, EMYR, ELLADORA & PRIYA]

Just wanted to let you all know that I made it back okay. I don't want to talk about it-

We didn't catch the guy, though. The vampire. Vampires, Merlin's-

You alright, Emyr?

I probably shouldn't have asked my daughter what she'd like for lunch, because this happened:

( Not an IC cut. )

I mean, it's delicious, yes. I'll just have to spend an additional hour jogging tonight.

my head is killing me and i woke up with this running around my flat making noise.

( not an ic cut )
who wants a cat?