Nov. 26th, 2018 at 6:21 AM
What: Journal Post
When: 11/26, Morning
Sometimes I feel so alone and it makes me feel cold inside. Even when I am in a room full of people, the loneliness covers me like a stiff, hard blanket. I try to make connections with people. But the fear always holds me back.
I am always afraid. I'm afraid of getting too close to anyone. You get close to people they get taken away or they die. You get too close to people and some of them aren't people at all. They're snakes in the grass. I am afraid of getting caught. I'm afraid of dying. I'm afraid of waking up and being too afraid to move.
The fear grips me like an iron vice and sometimes I think...I think is this all worth it? Maybe I was better off before. Stupid. Anything is better than that. No, I can't go back to that.
So I'm reaching out for a lifeline. I'm tired of being afraid and alone.
When: 11/26, Morning
Sometimes I feel so alone and it makes me feel cold inside. Even when I am in a room full of people, the loneliness covers me like a stiff, hard blanket. I try to make connections with people. But the fear always holds me back.
I am always afraid. I'm afraid of getting too close to anyone. You get close to people they get taken away or they die. You get too close to people and some of them aren't people at all. They're snakes in the grass. I am afraid of getting caught. I'm afraid of dying. I'm afraid of waking up and being too afraid to move.
The fear grips me like an iron vice and sometimes I think...I think is this all worth it? Maybe I was better off before. Stupid. Anything is better than that. No, I can't go back to that.
So I'm reaching out for a lifeline. I'm tired of being afraid and alone.