8:32 AM
TO: Lumos, Maddie, Betty, Chelsea
[1] SOS!
[2] It's happened again!
[...]
[3] Sorry! I'm not dying or hooking up with that guy from the Department of Mysteries again, even if it sounded like it!
[4] I need your brains to come up with good excuses to get out of this purist charity event without pissing everyone off.
[5] STAT.