The Exam: IC Community

Finally got proper footing once I got into this janitor closet on the first floor. Don't think it's gonna be a good time either way. Too much water and not enough fucking ways to get out of it. So if anyone's got a trick to get out of this, I'm all ears.

If I ever get my chainsaw hand back, I promise to repay you the favor someday when you need your life saved.

So, this is embarrassing. I'm not outside but I need assistance when someone is available.

Anybody caught outside of the main building, let us know where you are and who's with you here in this post. We can better coordinate efforts to get to you if we know where you are.

IM OUTSID E BUT DON WORRY IM STICKY HELP ERY1 ELSE 1ST

Might I inquire as to whether or not someone has seen Lee Sizemore? I fear he may have gotten stuck out in the storm, but if he is with someone then that would be better.

I know at this point we're kind of like 'oh, it's dark as fuck outside, wonder what will happen, maybe storm, maybe not, y/n??' And not to harsh anyone's mellow but this TED Talk is to inform you that there's a storm coming and it's literally going to chew up the hotel and spit it out in a pile of debris. I'm like the world's shittiest seer but that vision was pretty clear cut.

The erupting volcano was less clear cut, so I'm thinking either we all perish in the storm OR get burned up by lava in the next room.  Either way, it's crispy.

But maybe focus on the issue closest first, so.  Do we actually have a plan re: the super storm?  Like, yeah, we could bring the beach chairs inside but I saw that sides of hotel walls were missing so it might take a little more prep, if we can't figure out a way to stop it entirely.   
    
( I even drew a picture of it because that's what you do when you get psychic visions. )

There's like, lightning and rain and look, I already said I'm a shitty seer but doingmybest.gif

By now, I suppose some of you will have noticed that "Irma" and myself are still with you. You may be wondering why some of the "natives" from the last room followed you here. You may soon have other questions, and we are prepared to answer the ones we can.

My name is Helmut Zemo, of Sokovian Military Intelligence. My colleague is Sharon Carter, of the Central Intelligence Agency. And this is not the first time I have been in a place like this.

This puzzle doesn't fill me with a lot of confidence that the weather is going to clear. If I've got it right, it reads: For many days we had been tempest-tossed. Six times had the darkness closed over a wild and terrific scene, and returning light as often brought but renewed distress, for the raging storm increased in fury until on the seventh day all hope was lost.

… which is the opening sentence from The Swiss Family Robinson. If you weren't as big on books as I was as a kid, it's about a family that shipwrecks near an island and has to learn to survive there.

So maybe everyone planning around a storm has the right idea, is what I'm saying.

What do I do if I'm not any of those trees?

Everyone keeps telling me - or each other - not to get comfortable.

Screw that.

Worrying about might happen is just dealing with the same problem twice.

The way these puzzles are going, I expect pirates in our future... Aye matey. Pirate ship. Batten down the hatches?

Guess it's better than volcanic sacrifices.

This is not what I expected the afterlife to be like. I thought it would be really different, like some other world. It's good though. The beach is an amazing surprise. I hadn't been outside in so long

I just wanted to see all the people I'd lost again. Like my best friend.  Or my mom. and dad   Is there a way to find them here? 

Did anyone else look at that puzzle and think they had a stroke? Or is it just these meds.

Also I think I accidentally got myself adopted into a cult family.

I realize that some of you may not be interested in supporting a rebellion for a variety of reasons, be it the potential cost to you personally, the fear of retaliation, or the fact that you rolled on a bunch of us and you don't want us all to find out. And ind i'm not here to convince you. Your decisions are your own.

But for those of you who aren't interested in slowly starving to death in a Soviet Christmas Prison, I have a plan.

I think we've all noticed by now that most of the weapons we've been able to gather have been glorified gardening supplies. But those of us who've been to the yulelag all know that the prison has a pretty massive cache of axes and sharpeners. I think the move here is for as many of us as possible to go where the weapons are, and fight our way out.

I'll just come right out and say that I turned in several of you, I do not regret it, and I'd do it again.

Since you seem pretty familiar with the black market, can you do me a solid? John's really sick again. Like it's worse than last time. Can you get the right medicine? If not, let me know, I'll do it on lunch but I could get turned in by someone else this time.

I'm beginning to hate snow.

[FILTERED FROM IRMA/SOVIETS]
Anyone else getting tired of this place and want to do something about it?

[ZEMO]
Markus says you have spoken about a trade?

I'd question how often someone was going to get sick, but when you're starving and in the cold, I guess the answer is a lot.

So in college once, I had a roommate whose friend left a bottle of gin in our fridge. One night we got so fucked up we just drank everything else from the fridge with the gin, like, mixing it together - ketchup, mustard, the works.  Our vomit was super sad and everything also tasted and smelled like Pine-Sol for some reason.

That describes my experience in Christmas prison, for the most part. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.