Keys to Wonderland

[written on a sheet of paper that was meant to be a display sign]

Edited: one free samples per person

It's a mess.

If ever I could bring a downpour,

now feels like it would be a nice time.

[Fog]

Consider my bones chilled. I'm not quite afraid of anything- but such blatant sadism on the Queen's part is enough to make my stomach turn.

How are you faring?

[Chessica]

And how've you been?

Oh, well. It seems like it's as good as any other time to decide to pass by. It seems like I might be staying "around" for a while.

Maybe a little story will make things better, yes?

[Storm]

Darling.

[Rebellion types]

Ah.

What a pickle.

Another ingenious idea from the Queen. It's a great way of getting rid of those who have no right being here.

On that note, I found an Oyster, but as I've never had to capture anything before in my life, I made some rookie mistakes. Of course, that will never happen again. I have learned my lesson. So, I figured, in this case, it might not hurt having a helper. Of course, all the spoils will go to me. My helper could get something depending on the quality of work they do.

So, I'm 'the most peculiar kitty', now? Peculiar... I like that word.

Words are such funny, fickle things, are they not? I bet, if I wrote a word right now, no two people would look at it the same. That's the lovely thing about words, is it not? They can be everything and nothing all at once, and all because you -- the person reading this, that is -- has already made up their mind about what it is or isn't.

Reasons like that are why I don't like when people try to define me, since who are you to decide what I am, even if it's just what I am to you. You're nothing, that's what. Not from where I'm standing... but none of that matters, right, as you've already made your judgments. Maddening, that, but then again what isn't? Not that any of you lot seem to care.

Oi, Hatter, there's something I've been wanting to tell you. It's about your hat. I.. I've always admired that hat... Give it to me, would you? Bah, I know you won't, but I still had to ask. Honestly though, I really do love that hat. I would wear it to all the finest occasions...

[People of the Rebellion]

As I inadvertently kicked off this whole farce of a competition do let me know if there are any Oysters out there you feel are in need of an Invisibility Token-Charms. These will be given on a case by case basis and not for free, so be willing to offer me something in return.

[Billy (aka Caradoc)/Darius] (separate filters to each)

I've set aside some Invisibility Token-Charms, if you feel a need for one or two.

Random question:

Apparently Oysters are a thing that happens, alright. Do things from the other world (my world, in case there are, eh, several) appear here? Would they be at the market? Where at the market?

Just wondering, you know.

[Scrawled very nonchalantly in the corner of a napkin.]

Oysters, oysters everywhere
and not a drop to drink.

They're all the worst sort, too.

my brother brought home an oyster. an oyster, can you believe that? who in their right mind helps an oyster? he even gave her my clothes...




on that note: who would like to go out with my brother? he's very nice and sweet and works too much.

I've seen others having these pens and the writings on the walls, but I've never had one before now. I don't know if I'll have a lot to say, but I do enjoy reading. It took a lot to get this pen so I will have to figure out something more to say with it.

I'm writing on a tree and seeing words coming out of other trees, so I guess this is going to be seen by other people? I mean, it's crazy but I guess that's about right when you consider this is a totally realistic (in a way) hallucination, product of me falling into some stupid hole and probably breaking my neck or something. So now my brain is stretching my last seconds of life by giving me some chance to make peace with the world or something via ridiculous hallucinations.

I've seen it, there's at least two TV shows of that. With the cops and stuff. Sure, one guy gets run by a car and ends up in the forties, and I fall down through a hole and get...Lost meets Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, with Lucy In the Sky with Diamonds as the setting. Way to go, brain.

What's up with the roses, anyway?

I don't like calm nights.
They leave me alone with my thoughts.

It's not the alone part I mind, I quite like that. I like having time to myself, and I'm sure it's the same with most people- even on a smaller basis, everyone requires their me time.

But my thoughts are the worst company you could imagine. They run amok, tearing something wild through my head and generally being loud, thundering nuisances.

However that is quite enough about that.

If anyone is curious, next week, once the celebrations have ended- I can almost promise you at least one rain storm.

It could get quite bad.

This is not the first time I've woken to being soaking wet from random swims, but to wake up in an entirely different country seems strange. Or this doesn't look like any part of the United Kingdom I know.

Oh and to find a pen tucked into my skirt and writing scrolling by on a piece of wood. Maybe those pills were stronger than I thought.

There's been lots of people wandering through the forest lately, and some of them have had to learn the hard way that we don't take kindly to people not watching where they walk. Yeah, sure things look all tangly and overgrown, but that's someones' roots you're stepping on there and that's not cool.

You should've seen the last group start running when I had to warn them off, hahah, it was like they forgot how to use their legs!

'His eyes are wild, psychotic slits that bat-dance in your soul looking for good things to crush or bad elements to identify with.'

Sand. Sea. Sand.
Sea.
Sand.

I've never felt like a lobster before. Trapped in a net, caught in a cage. I've never had someone try convincin' me I'm dead, neither.
At least, not until today.
But. I'm all for new experiences. Like cake, with extra herbal ingredients.
I'm wet and the sand's dry. It's uh... yeah, confused. I'm dreaming. It's alright. I'm dreaming.

(OOC intro tomorrow)

I apologize to people I was conversing with at the market earlier today. I must have seemed awfully daft for the last while, before I left. I think I nearly forgot my own name. Which is such a terribly embarrassing thing to do!

So sorry for leaving abruptly, and if I called you by the wrong name. You are all lovely and memorable.

In other news, I have some of the most wonderful fabric in my shop right now, made by a very talented individual who may prefer to remain nameless? Either way, it is gorgeous, and perfectly unique - why the fabric will not even look the same on any two people. Currently I'm working on a gown from the fabric, and a very striking coat as well. And a scarf for myself, as I promised I would! I may make a few other small accessories as well, scarves or ascots or hair facinators as well. Every last bit of this wonderful material must be used! If anyone would like to come in and have a look at these creations, pop by Whimsy! OIr just come to say hello, I do love visitors.


[Rebellion People]

200 years is far too long a time. It pains me to think of all the strife caused to individuals of Wonderland. All of this 'celebration' only reminds me of it all.

So, what are our current plans. What can we do? What can I do? I feel the need, even more than usual, to do something.
[end privacy]

I'd like to file a complaint with whoever felt it was a smart idea to tie a red ribbon about my tail while I napped in a tree. I do realize there is an expression having to do with letting sleeping dogs lie, however I feel it's high time to campaign for one about not bedecking sleeping cats in ribbons. This is highly annoying -- not only can my paws not get a good enough grip on it to untie it, but I feel a compulsive need to attempt to catch it when I see it swishing arrogantly from my tail.

...and since I don't have any clothing nearby I can't shift to my furless form, as the locals don't seem to like a naked Cheshire lounging about. Their loss, really.

Now then, who wants to do this cat a favour? Or... should I keep my tail beribboned, to give it that more festive look?

[Storm's handwriting is thin, and flowing, with looping script and very little pressure on the pen itself. His handwriting dances between elegant and illegible, with generous spacing between words, and a large letter space. His message takes up almost half a sheet of parchment by itself, despite it's relative shortness.]

I'm under the impression that it may not rain for the next week. There's still a chance- if some ambitious tendril of hot air decides to ascend a little too quickly, there could be the smallest of rain showers. But it would be quick, and warm, and gentle. Little ambitious warm fronts usually make the sweetest little showers.

But after that, I'm not sure. I'm feeling positively torrential. I would hope no one's festivities are ruined, but that all depends, really.

I wouldn't take my forecasting too seriously, but I would get an umbrella, if you're the sort who becomes bothered by a little rain.

It is terribly rude to disguise one's self as a saucer and remain as such, even when asked to return to a form that includes a mouth.

They are trying to tell me that the saucer is just a saucer, but I know better. The saucer is yellow you see. That is very suspicious. Very suspicious indeed.

I want to smash it, but I already broke three plates last week. Yesterday is last week.

So. I am adding that saucer to my list of people I DO NOT LIKE. I am on to you, saucer.

People I DO NOT LIKE
- All cats.
- All birds that eat rodents.
- Anything that eats rodents, for that matter. Savages. Terrible savages. May your teeth fall out of your head and be replaced by jelly.
- The man that was wearing green striped trousers on the eighteenth Tuesday of four years ago.
- Whoever ate my aphid and honey scone three months ago (it was not me, I have it on very good authority).
- The man who dumped a pitcher of water on my head just because I fell asleep in his bed. IT WAS THERE and also, that water had lemons in it. The seeds got stuck in my hair.
- Barbers.
- The old lady who hits people with her cane.
- That saucer.