So, right.

Would anyone be interested in participating in a scavenger hunt? You know, like I'd go around and hide things all over the world and leave clues and whatnot, and people could box around to different places? I mean, it'd take me a bit to set up and whatever, but I guess before I bothered with that, I'd want to see if anyone was interested.

I mean, if we get enough people, I'd totally do it.

I could probably even come up with a really good prize. Like, I know where this bitchin' diamond mine is? If people were into that.

So, right, just, you know, drop me a message if you're down for a hunt.

( Omg, I'm playing with myself )

So, um, I'm guessing this isn't China. . . and that I'm not still on mission anymore.

Uh, soooo. . . Anyone know where the closest American Embassy is? I think I'm in space, but not on Mir or Voyager, so it's some other space station. Stardock or something like that.

Also, I seem to be missing about five of my team members.

There is a spider.

In my bathroom.

It's like, a friggen tarantula, or some shit.

It's huge.

Can someone who's not a jerk and going to tease me with it and who isn't afraid of them please come get rid of it for me?

[here] is where I am.

So, there's this really bitchin' thunderstorm here, out in like, west cape Africa or something if anyone wants to come watch it with me?

Right, okay, I'm [here]. In a little cabin deal, all by myself.

... no, that's not a hint. Seriously.

Los Angeles. How fitting. However, not the place where I imagined I'd end up. This isn't the way out. I'm also fairly certain that I didn't have a Blackberry that referred to itself as a 'godbox' when I left. Reluctant as I am to admit it, I don't... know what's going on. Locke? Richard?

...Jacob?

I have a lot of time to kill.

And I'm kind of bored. Or restless. Either way, I have tons of energy.

Does anyone need anything found? Or some chatty company? I can ski now! I totally learned a couple days ago.

So uh....

Accident'ly won a costume contest. Have tickets t' the midnight showin' film of dat movie.

Takers? I'm bringin' bourbon, de only way I can sit t'rough it.

Y'know, now that Spring Break season's windin' down, it's gettin' a bit borin' down here. Anybody got any ideas what t'do?

Gwai-gwai long duh dong!
(What the Hell!)

This ain' my bunk! Where the hell am I?

Somebody best give me some answers or'I'ma gonna be mighty upset.

So, right.

It's Saturday evening, and I'm bored.

So I'm offering free massages. I heard I'm pretty good with my hands.

And if it turns into sex a movie and popcorn, even better.

[OOC: thread is here; feel free to assume if you don't want to play though]

Heading to the Bahamas today, then maybe bopping out to Hawaii. Who's in the mood for some sand and surf with suits optional?

... yeah, you heard me.

- jaime

ps, I would definitely need someone to rub sunblock on my back.

Edited
Lily and I are here if anyone wants to join us.

This is nothing short of unacceptable and I'll not be treated in this manner.  Someone must - and indeed, will - pay for this, mark that. 

If there isn't a book about you, or a movie, or a TV show (and it isn't that Gilmore Girls one. Someone suggested it already. Soooo not me. I'm not that ... snowflakey)

... then where do you look for stuff about you? Does it mean I just don't exist? I mean, obviously I exist, but everyone else is all "oh, I saw myself on TV last night," or "oh, I read this story about how awesome I am," but me? I got nothin'.

I thought I found a book about me. Turns out it was about some elves and fairies and shit.

Unright.


Jaime Davies

You know, I've been here... a really long time, and I still don't get this whole holiday. Death and chocolate, and sometimes sex. Really, that combination made sense to someone?

I'm all about the second and third, though, if anyone else is interested.

Little box, with a link -

- blink -

new message from the outside world.

Searching for a man with a Universe? He could explain.

Yet he is a she and he is not here. No one is here. Am all alone in the world.

Little lost puppet, wishing on a star. How I wonder where you are?

Will continue my search.

So, with this whole world out there ...

... I'm bored.

Who else is here? C'mon. These phone dealies have to be good for something, right? Tell me who you are and where you're from.

I'm Jaime, I'm a mutant, and I'm from New York. Well, a version of NY, anyway. 'parently there's more than one. Go figure, right? Anyway, I find things. That's my big-bad mutant skill.

Uh . . . Okay, I think I took a wrong turn somewhere. Crap, this is why I don't usually drive . . .

What the fuck, is this shit?

No, I mean, seriously? Just. Wtf, wtf, wtf.

So, okay ...

... I got nothin'.

So, fine. Hi. I'm Jaime, and apparently I'm a new resident here. Funny, 'cause I totally thought I was still in my New York, but there's some freaky ass shit here that is clearly, clearly not belonging in my world. So I'm going to guess this shiny new phone I got with the cheerful little "Welcome to Hell" note on it is for real, huh?